


A Demolished Spirit (Countryhumans)

by Vattenbestaendig, Velho



Category: CountryHumans
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alcohol Withdrawal, America is being cute, Austria had an addiction to burn his skin, Austria has depression, Austria smokes cigarettes and weed, Author Is Sleep Deprived, Both authors are sleep deprived, EU drinks too much, EU is constantly stressed out, EU is workaholic, EU smokes occasionally, EU tries his best to help UN, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Everyone Has Issues, Everyone is worried about UN's mental health, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Japan is kawaii, M/M, Multi, Self Confidence Issues, Self-Destruction, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Hatred, Soviet is aggressive, UN & EU Have terrible coping mechanisms, UN has depression, UN has serious issues, UN hates himself, UN is addicted to cutting himself, UN is sleep deprived, UN is workaholic, UN smokes, UN starves himself, WHO doesn't know how to handle feelings, WHO is terrible at feelings, WHO is terrible at socializing, WHO smokes, WTO abuses pain medication, WTO is sarcastic, WTO's back is fucked up, Welcome to the trigger train
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-18
Updated: 2021-02-08
Packaged: 2021-03-05 03:48:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 11
Words: 44,876
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25357987
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vattenbestaendig/pseuds/Vattenbestaendig, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Velho/pseuds/Velho
Summary: UN has a problem, he neglects and abuses himself, performs multiple different ways to harm himself.Can his friends and his lover save him from himself before it's too late when they have their own problems to solve in the meantime?Every character has issues, but not everyone can solve them on their own.
Relationships: China/Taiwan, EU&EU countries, EU/UN, Finland/Estonia, Japan/South-Korea, Russia/USA, Switzerland/Austria/Germany, UN&Other countries, WHO/WTO, france/uk
Kudos: 22





	1. Character Descriptions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Edit 1: 20.12.2020  
> Added new character descriptions, new characters, modified older descriptions. -Vattenbestaendig
> 
> Edit 2: 21.12.2020  
> Modified some character descriptions. -Velho
> 
> Edit 3: 30.12.2020  
> Added a character and its description. -Vattenbestaendig

**UN/United Nations 🇺🇳**

Skin color: Light blue

Gender: Male

Age: Born in June 26th 1945.

(but as we all know countryhumans don't age the same way as humans do.) In this story he is 36 years old.

Sexuality: Homosexual

Height: 263cm or 8' 7 35⁄64" 

He is abnormally tall. He has very long legs. He is very slender as he is alarmingly skinny. His face doesn't look skinny but normal.

Sometimes if he forgets to eat for a long period of time he can faint or his bones start to show more visibly under his skin.

He has a white glowing leaf/feather crown on top of his head sitting like one Julius Caesar wore. 

He has an UN world map halo floating right on top of the crown he has.

He has white eyeballs and black rings on them as eyes. He basically has no eye color. He has black thick rectangle eyebrows. He also has violet eyebags as he usually won't sleep due to unhumane working habits.

He usually wears a fluffy cream colored long-sleeved wool turtleneck and black suit trousers accompanied by suit shoes.

On rare occasions he is seen wearing a complete suit.

Personality: Calm, caring, sarcastic, workaholic, tries to stay positive but usually fails to do so, a peace-loving bean, intentionally or unintentionally neglets self-care as he always looks after everyone else, has some sociopathic traits as he can turn off his emotions/feelings if he decides so.

He can put on somekind of a façade of normality; to sound, look and behave normally in order not to gain any negative attention towards himself. He had managed to keep his bad habits from spreading into a common knowledge of him. 

He can 'quarantine' his emotions if they are too much for him to handle. However he needs to release those emotions eventually as they will slowly eat his spirit and soul alive if he holds on them too long.

So he can pretend that everything is fine and fool others to not 'help' him. However EU knows when UN is faking his emotions.

Sometimes negative feelings get the better of him and he has to suffocate them off by drinking or practicing different forms of self-harm. Such as: burning his wrists and arms with cigarettes (he smokes), cutting, starving, self-neglet.

He has bandages on both of his arms but they are well hidden under his shirt. He cuts himself on a daily basis but has managed to hid it from others thus far. So basically his both arms are completely covered in bandages from wrists to the shoulders.

He has depression but is trying to reduce it. And to deny it.

He is well liked by all countries but he has a 'slight' issues with countries who has war on each other. He tries to reason with them to start negotiation in order to solve their conflicts.

He and EU are in a relationship.

He has little to no problems dealing with all countries who have agreed on his terms of UN membership. 

He doesn't necessarily like North Korea or Soviet Union but tries to be nice to them even though they are pretty rude to him.

**Soviet Union/USSR/СССР 🚩**

Skin color: Red with yellow/golden Soviet symbol on his face

Gender: Male

Age: Born in 30th December 1922. 

In this story he is 58 years old.

Sexuality: Demisexual heteroromantic

Height: 204cm or 6' 8 5⁄16" He is also very tall but also muscular. He has wide shoulders and very formed arms and torso.

He has an eyepatch on his left eye. It is black and has the soviet symbols on it. The leather strings holding it on place are dark brown as they are made from a real leather.

He wears a brown ushanka which has the red soviet star on it and green leaves on both of sides. 

He also wears his brownish-green military uniform on a daily basis. Under it he has a white turtleneck and brown trousers. He also wears his winter boots.

He has a white eyeball with a green eye. Under the eyepatch he has an obsidian black eyeball (it's not bruised or anything, it's just black) and he cannot see anything with that eye.

He has slight eyebags but tries to get rid of them.

Personality: Sadistic, aggressive, introvert, doesn't like anything new, everything which isn't done the same way like 'old times' irritates him. He is technophobic so he hates and fears anything which is too technically advanced such as smartphones or new computers. He has his own old ways how to raise children. He likes to see others in pain caused by him. 

He has anger issues and is very violent if he gets too drunk.

He hates almost everyone and almost everyone hates him.

He loves to be in nature and being alone.

He sometimes drinks vodka in oder to relax.

He does not want to spend any more time than is absolutely necessary with EU or Germany as they don't excactly like each other.

**EU/European Union 🇪🇺**

Skin color: Dark blue with 12 golden stars on his face formed like his flag

Gender: Male

Age: Born in 1958. 

In this story he is 41 years old.

Sexuality: Demisexual biromantic 

Height: 197cm or 6' 5 9⁄16" 

He is fairly slim but has a pot belly and he would look 6 months pregnant if he were a woman. Caused by spending _a bit_ too much time on bars drinking alcohol mostly with his German friends.

He has rectangular glasses hanging on top of his nose as his eyesight isn't the best.

He also has a golden halo floating on top of his head on a 50° angle. It has a few stars hanging from threads, some with longer strings, some with smaller ones.

He has black thick eyebrows. 

He has black eyeballs and golden rings as eyes on them. His bad eyesight is correlating with his black eyes but luckily he still has his golden eyerings so he isn't completely blind.

He sees well with his glasses but without them he only sees blur everywhere.

He wears a black suit jacket and suit trousers, he has a white suit shirt under the jacket and a red tie. He also wears black suit shoes.

He has problems dealing with stress and drinking. As drinking the stress away with his friends has been his way doing it. If he however cannot drink his stress away he sometimes smoke to get rid of the stress.

He smokes occasionally. 

Personality: Easy-going, has a good sense of humor, gets easily stressed, friendly, a bit of a workaholic but not so much that it affects his life too much, perfectionist (all what he does have to be done as good as possible, if not it upsets him), talkative, he might have a light form of alcoholism, enjoys being and chatting with almost everyone.

He and UN are in a relationship. This relationship is sometimes destroying him from the inside as UN's mental health declines. 

EU has no problems dealing with almost anyone, but due to current situations his and UK's companionship has cooled down. EU also has a slight problem with Poland and Hungary as they have disobeyed some of the terms of EU membership they had previously agreed on.

EU also has a bit of a grudge with Soviet Union and with the current Russia (his relationship will get better with Russia eventually.)

Even though he don't excactly like Soviet or Russia he still can be nice and friendly towards them.

**Germany 🇩🇪**

Skin color: Black, Red and Yellow, just like a German flag 

Gender: Male

Age: Born in 3rd October 1990. 

In this story he is 18 years old.

Sexuality: Pansexual

Height: 183cm or 5' 11 21⁄32"

He has a fairly normal bodyshape, nothing unusual.

He has white eyeballs and green eyes, and white thick eyebrows.

He has rectangular glasses just like EU's, although his eyesight is a way better than EU's. He mainly uses them when reading or working (School).

He wears a forest green hat with a couple of large oak leaves put on nicely on the right side of the hat. 

He usually wears a black suit with a white suit shirt underneath accompanied by either red or black tie. When he is on more casual company he wears the same suit shirt but without the black jacket, he either has the tie still on or is without it.

He has a tragic past and sometimes gets flashbacks about the Third Reich, he has PTSD and problems with anxiety. He has an anxiety medication to help him reduce the problems.

Despite of all this he still has an optimistic mindset and looks gladly to the future. (Thanks to Switzerland).

Personality: Energetic, friendly, optimistic, anxious, likes to spend time with his friends, extrovert, likes to dance, likes to drink beer with friends, seen as a workaholic but he actually is not but likes to finish all his work on time and that sometimes gets in a way of his social life.

He is in a relationship with Switzerland and Austria.

Germany lives with his brother EU and with UN.

**Switzerland 🇨🇭**

Skin color: Red with a white cross in the middle on her face just like her flag 

Gender: Female

Age: Born in 1848.

In this story she is 22 years old.

Sexuality: Heterosexual

Height: 177cm or 5' 9 11⁄16"

She is a bit chubby by nature but she cares about her health. 

She has white eyeballs and brown eyes.

She has black fairly thin eyebrows. 

She usually wears a white wool hat, pink and black flower styled dress, black stockings and white winter shoes.

She also likes to wear skirts and trousers but is rarely seen wearing them. Only in a special occasion she might wear those.

She loves to ski and ice skate.

Personality: She is very outgoing and friendly, kind, warm-heartened person, always makes sure everyone is having good time, very caring, animal lover, very easy going, has little to no issues whatsoever so she is always willing to help others get over with their problems or issues.

She is a trained medical professional. (Nurse).

She is in a relationship with Germany and Austria.

**Austria 🇦🇹**

Skin color: Red with a white stripe in the middle of his face just like his flag. 

Gender: Male

Age: 27th July 1955.

In this story he is 21 years old.

Sexuality: Demisexual biromantic.

Height: 185cm or 6' 53/64"

He is overweight, and he had struggled all his life to loose weight but never really succeeded so he eventually gave up. 

He has white eyeballs and hazel eyes. But usually his eyes are dull so they look gray. His eyes change color from hazel to gray depending what he feels inside. The more hazel his eyes the less negative thoughts he has, the grayer/duller his eyes the more negative thoughts he has.

He wears a brown leather jacket, a green hat (similar to Germany's) but he has common pheasant feathers on his hat. 

He wears a gray long sleeved wool shirt, under it he has light orange t-shirt. He wears black jeans and brown shoes. 

He has also black socks.

His father had abused him ever since he was little. Everything Austria did was never enough for his father and he always got punished for what ever he 'did wrong'.

His mindset slowly corrupted and he begun to think that he actually was the one to fault. But at some point he 'awakened' and realized what he was doing to himself and quitted his self-harm.

He had burned his skin with cigarettes, he has a few very deep burns and some of his raw flesh and muscles are visible if he takes off his bandages from his forearms.

He smokes cigarettes and weed.

His father always expected him to do perfectly in school and that every test and exam he has to get the best possible results. 

All that stress from his father and school eventually caused him to collapse into a depression.

Personality: Easily irritated, a bit rude (didn't mean to be, he just don't expect people to be kind to him), anxious, a bit oblivious, he is kind to people who care about him but he is wary of new people. He can fall back into a grim mindset easily but some special people can make him smile. He smiles very seldomly.

**Russia 🇷🇺**

Skin color: Red everywhere else but he has white and blue on his face as the flag is there. 

Gender: Male

Age: Born after Soviet Union ceased to be, 1991.

In this story he is 19 years old.

Sexuality: Bisexual

Height: 192cm or 6' 3 19/32"

He is very muscular just like his father Soviet.

He has white eyeballs and light blue eyes.

He has black thick eyebrows. 

He wears similar ushanka as Soviet but the leaves on his ushanka are golden, not green.

He usually wears a light blue straped white t-shirt, a black adidas hoodie with a zipper on front. Blue trousers and adidas shoes. He has bandages on his wrists but hides them under his hoodie if possible.

He wears an orthodoxic golden cross necklace on top of his t-shirt.

He is traumatized by the constant abuse his father had done to him. He still flinches if he is remembering some of the moments when his father would hit him with his belt or bare hands even though Russia rarely even did anything bad or disobeyed anyone.

His father raised all his children to be equal to one another by beating them all up equally. His younger siblings have not suffered as much abuse as him being the eldest sibling. Soviet even changed his method of raising children a bit after he caught Russia self-harming the first time.

Soviet has became more nice to Russia but the old scars of his abuse are still fading and Russia is still very vary of his father.

Russia started to cut himself when he was 12 years old but his father had always tried to make him quit it.

He still cuts himself but not on a daily basis as he once did.

He is doing a bit better now as he and America are together.

Personality: Mostly calm (sometimes aggressive), pessimistic, shy, a bit grim, blames himself often, is vary of making friends aa he is afraid that they would betray him or hurt him.

America can effectively raise his mood.

Russia and America are in a relationship.

**America/USA/US/The United states of America 🇺🇸**

Skin color: Mostly white, has some red stripes on his hands and legs but has the US flag on his face. 

Gender: Male

Age: Declarated independent July 4th 1776. 

In this story he is 19 years old.

Sexuality: Homosexual

Height: 180cm or 5' 10 55⁄64"

He is very slim but has somewhat of muscles.

He has black eyeballs but can somehow see completely fine. His eyes are however extremely sensitive to light and that's why he always wears sunglasses/shades. He has grey rings as eyes but his eyes are usually seen as completely blacks.

He wears a black NATO t-shirt and blue jeans accompanied by red sneakers. He has a gray hoodie always with him at all times with a zipper if he feels cold.

He used to have bandages on his arms but as he quitted self-harm he had taken the bandages off and only very faint scars are visible.

He also used to have an eating disorder called anorexia, he was a way too self-conscious about his looks even though he never had any excess weight to loose.

He is fairly flirtatious and likes romantic stuff. 

He also loves to steal kisses from Russia every now and then, mostly when they are in public places. He likes to see Russia blush, he thinks it's cute.

Personality: Easy-going, flirtatious, romantic, easily excited, has a great sense of humor, friendly, the supportive boyfriend we all need, very loyal, dog-lover.

He is in a relationship with Russia.

America still lives with his parents, UK and France (They will be seen a rare in this story so I probably don't need to describe them).

**Asean/Association of Southeast Asian Nations**

Skin color: Dark blue but has a white-red-yellow ASEAN logo on her face.

Gender: Female

Age: Born in August 8th 1967

In this story she is 37 years old.

Sexuality: Asexual

Height: 168cm or 5' 6 9⁄64"

She is skinny, very feminine and has very great skills of makeup.

She has white eyeballs, blue irises and pupils of magenta fading to yellow on the bottom of the pupil.

She has similar glasses on as EU and Germany but they are for seeing well as she drives, walks or when she needs to see far objects more sharply.

She is EU's cousin.

She almost always wears a light gray suit jacket and black suit trousers, a red suit shirt and a an orange tie.

She has white almost thin eyebrows.

She is very smart and gets along with almost everyone.

She has no medical conditions and has had nice childhood.

She makes no big deal about it though as she know how easily it can trigger other people who had abusive childhood or has became depressed due to hostile behaviour towards them. She is friends with Switzerland, and together they are doing good and helping people with their problems.

Personality: Calm, good person, always willing to help others, loves peace almost as much as UN does, a great businesswoman, she doesn't get stressed easily, a bit sensitive but tries not to get irritated as easily as she is able to.

**UK/United Kingdom 🇬🇧**

Skin color: Dark blue, white and red. Has red stripes on his arms and legs. The flag is on his face.

Gender: Male

Age: Born in 5th December 1922

In this story he is 54 years old.

Sexuality: Heterosexual 

Height: 185cm or 6' 53⁄64"

He is wearing a monocle and a top hat. 

He is always wearing formal clothes, mainly 17th century royal clothes but also a modern suit.

Personality: Easy-going, well-mannered, generous, friendly, pompous, optimistic and is not easily irritated but once mad he is dangerous. 

He is in relationship with France and he is always calling her nicknames such as: Dear, honey and sugar.

USA thinks it's annoying but rarely says anything about it. 

**France/French Republic 🇫🇷**

Skin color: Blue, white and red. Has red color in her left side and blue on her right side. Her abdomen and face is colored like her flag.

Gender: Female 

Age: Born in 4th October 1958

In this story she is 48 years old.

Sexuality: Heterosexual 

Height: 177cm or 5' 9 11⁄16"

She is wearing a beret, latest fashion clothes and black leather shoes.

She has white eyeballs and brown eyes. 

She has white eyebrows. 

She is always very nice to others.

Personality: Calm, kind, caring, family-oriented, friendly, optimistic, a bit oblivious and loves to cook

She is in relationship with UK

**China/People's Republic of China 🇨🇳**

Skin color: Red with yellow/golden stars on his face

Gender: Male

Age: Born in 4th December 1982

In this story he is 24 years old

Sexuality: Bisexual 

Height: 172cm or 5' 7 23⁄32"

He is wearing traditional formal Chinese clothing, sometimes a tiny Chinese hat.

He has white eyeballs and black eyes. 

He has white round eyebrows

Personality: Easy-going, flirtatious, sarcastic, has a good sense of humor, sometimes a bit too dark humor for others to enjoy.

He is in relationship with Taiwan. 

**Taiwan 🇹🇼**

Skin color: Red, blue and white. His body is red and he only has his other flag colors on his face as the flag is located here

Gender: Male

Age: 16th July 1992

In this story he is 23 years old

Sexuality: Asexual homoromantic

Height: 181cm or 5' 11 17⁄64"

He has white eyeballs and brown eyes.

He wears a traditional Taiwanese formal clothing and behaves very well. 

Personality: Sarcastic, a party animal, friendly, optimistic, loves to hang around people.

He is in relationship with China.

**WHO/World Health Organization 🇺🇳🩺🔬**

Skin color: Light blue, has WHO flag on his face

Gender: Male

Age: Born in 7th April 1948

In this story he is 47 years old.

Sexuality: Asexual aromantic

Height: 237cm or 7' 9 5⁄16"

He is uncomfortably tall just like UN but luckily a bit shorter than him. He has very long legs.

He has enormous white wings.

He is slim but nothing compared to UN. He is on the healthy weight scale. He has dark violet undereyes caused by irregular sleeping as his work sometimes gets out of hand.

He is workaholic. He knows it and as a medical professional he knows his limits and will not push them.

He is a medical professional. He is a psychiatric, a psychologist, a therapist, a doctor, a scientist, an engineer, a biologist and an inventor.

He is insanely intelligent but lacks basic social skills.

Every emotional state of his is carefully considered, he calculates everything specifically to match the situation best.

He basically never has his real emotions when he is socializing with someone. When he is alone or with someone he trust he can show his true emotions.

He has to keep his emotions in check in order to properly maintain his professional state. His patients need to feel safe when they are talking to him. 

He has a white feather/leaf crown just like UN has.

He has thick round glasses, a white long lab coat, brown turtleneck and black trousers. He also has black suit shoes on.

He has black eyeballs and white glowing rings as eyes. He has very poor eyesight but he sees well with his eyeglasses. 

Even though he's a trained medical professional he is smoking cigarettes although he is thinking about quitting. 

He has black round eyebrows.

He has bandages on his neck from unsuccessful scientific experiments as the skin was badly burned. Now the skin is extremely touch-sensitive and he has to keep it bandaged to avoid unwanted touches such as shirt collar, wind, air in general.

He is not self-harming himself on purpose.

Personality: Calculative, a bit uncomfortable to be around as he studies every little facial or physical motion and translates them to analyze the country very sharply. He is also kind, warm-heartened, peace-loving, friendly and caring. 

He wants to do his part for the better world just like UN.

He and WTO are in relationship. 

**WTO/World Trade Organization 🇺🇳📑🗃**

Skin color: Pale gray

Gender: None. They/Them

Age: Born 1st January 1995.

In this story they are 28 years old

Sexuality: Asexual, demiromantic

Height: 232cm or 7' 7 11⁄32"

They are very tall, almost as tall as WHO.

They are quite slim but a bit overweight. They have very irregular eating habits. They have purple undereyes caused by not sleeping enough. They have insomnia.

They are in constant pain caused by staying awake. Their every limb and head is hurting as they aren't allowed to rest.

They have black eyes and red/green ring on their left eye and blue on the right one. They see completely fine. The rings glow brighter when they are having strong emotions such as anger or joy.

They have thick black eyebrows.

They are a completely workaholic, barely even knows what a vacation or weekends mean.

They have had a burn out a few times but always recovered from them by taking mood-lifting medication.

They have an addiction to pain medication and to take those mood-lifting medications. They are fully aware that if they develop tolerance to the letter they got a massive problem.

They are the purest form of an introvert, they never spend any time with others if it isn't absolutely necessary. It's not that they hate everyone but to the fact that they get exhausted from socializing. 

They are highly intelligent, almost as intelligent as WHO. They master the business, trading and law, WHO masters mostly only the science and medical. They would make a great team if worked together.

They have large black wings.

They are wearing a black turtleneck, a gray suit jacket, black trousers and black suit shoes.

They are almost always feeling grumpy as they don't have much to be happy about. 

Personality: Pessimistic, grumpy, workaholic, socially awkward, has no sense of humor but enjoys to comment dark sarcastic stuff. They have some anti-social tendencies such as sometimes enjoying to see someone suffer. And to not always be able to feel when someone is hurting them.

They are still nice to be around as they have no problems dealing with people and countries when they are behaving. 

They are dangerous to be around if they are very angry.

They and WHO are in a platonic relationship. They like each other very much that they are together but they would never e.g hold hands.

**PLEASE NOTE**

More characters will be listed as soon as they are developed with me and Velho.

See you soon! -Vattenbestaendig


	2. A Stressfull Morning

It was Monday morning, 5AM. UN tiredly rubbed his eyes and sighed, he had yet again pulled another allnighter. And the tiredness was a bit too much to handle and he had to rest his head for half an hour on his desk. 

He had left his office window open so he could smoke inside without anyone bragging him about it. Not that anyone sane person would be there working in the middle of the night like UN usually does.

UN then straighetened his position and sat on his chair. He looked at his desk.

There were a couple of folders full of fininshed and almost finished paperwork. A pile of unsorted paperwork and some issues other countries had with each other. Then there were a pencase full of different kinds of pens, pencils, erasers and one ruler. An ashtray and a letter knife.

He had never used the letter knife to any other purposes than to open letters. He has one drawer on the desk which has a lock on it where he had stored several knifes...just in case life gets rough again. 

He had already cutted himself once today, somewhere around 3 and 4 AM when he started to feel like he was pretty useless as he could not figure out what to do with ongoing war between Israel and Palestine. He had eventually given up trying to find a solution and started to sob. That project has been an ongoing issue for years now and there sill wasn't any solution to it despite all tries.

He had rolled up his both sleeves a bit and opened bandages from his wrists and unintentionally made more deeper cuts than he had planned to. It had caused much more bleeding than he had expected and he had to get a clean shirt as some of the blood stained his cream colored turtleneck.

He luckily had stored many of his clothes from his home to his office as he spends the most of his time here anyways, so he had another cream colored turtleneck available.

He had put the bloody turtleneck on one bag meant for used or dirty clothes which he will wash the next time he gets home.

He had rewrapped his arms on clean bandages and pulled the turtleneck's sleeves down enough to cover up any bandages from showing in case someone might see them and start asking questions.

He stretched his arms and legs and the pain they gave him made him remember that he had not slept for a week at least nor had he laid down. He legs felt very numb and they started to tingle as the blood started to yet again properly circulate through his legs as he stretched them.

His arms mainly hurted because the cuts he had previously made had gotten partly or fully stuck on the bandages he had on his arms. They stung and he folded his arms in oder to stop them from hurting.

He then glanced at the three laptops on his desktop. Every laptop had a different issue he needed to work on. 

He had a way too much work to do before he even could imagine getting any sleep.

He litted a cigarette and started to read the papers he hadn't gone through yet.

While he read the paper he at the same time typed on another document on one of his laptops. He remembered every location of keys on his keyboard, he could write without even looking at the same direction or while he read something else.

He also remembered what the document on his laptop was all about so it helped him to finish two pieces of work at once.

He had to be careful not to accidentally burn any of the papers he was holding on his left hand as he also had the cigarette on the same hand's fingers as he didn't hold the cigarette on his lips at all times. He wasn't someone who would instantly suck all the cigarette has, he tries to enjoy it slowly.

He had accidentally burned marks on some of his papers but they were luckily on the corners of the papers so he had not ruined anything important. Yet.

About two hours later he got a text message from EU.

-"Have you yet again spent another night at your office?" It read.

He sighed and replied:

-"Yes, but I will come home tonight, I promise."

He put his phone away but another message came through reading: -"Okay, see you at work." 

He smiled a bit knowing his day might not be so bad after all. All this work could be done faster if there was two people instead of just one.

He then continued his work as usual and went with the flow.

And apparently he had lost his sense of time as his office door opened. It was EU. 

The time was 9:02AM and EU's shift had started.

He had his usual businesssuit on and a laptop suitcase with him, and apparently he had broight some breakfast as he was carrying another bag.

"Morning." UN tiredly greeted him.

EU smiled sadly at the sight he had in front of him. A very sleep-deprived being trying to continue working despite his body telling him to sleep as his eyes were half lidded, and he was apparently having hard time keeping his head up as UN was holding his head on his hand and typing with another.

"Guten Morgen, have you slept at all last night?" He asked with an obvious concern on his tone as he walked towards UN's desk.

UN sighed and shook his head as a 'no'.

"I have rested my head on my desk for half an hour if that counts..." he murmured.

EU shook his head.

"Nein. It doesn't count. You have to sleep too, you know?" He reminded UN.

"Yes, I know but I haven't really got time for that luxury." He sadly admitted.

"If that's the case again, then you need to make time for that." He adviced as he pulled a sandwich baguette from the bag and handed it over to UN.

"Mmh..yes. I will make a note of that." He sleepily told him while continuing to type on his laptop and taking one post-it note out of one of the drawers and writing to it 'clear calender a bit for sleep if possible'.

He then took the baguette and begun eating it.

He had forgotten that he was hungry but was quickly reminded as he took the first bite. He didn't even remember when was the last time he ate.

EU watched as UN ate the baguette. He looked like a starved dog who got their meal after a long waiting.

He shook his head and sat down right beside UN.

"You really need to eat more regularly, you look yet again a bit starved." He pointed out as he saw UN's bony fingers and everything else.

UN stopped chewing for a bit and looked at EU's concerned expression and then back at his fingers and arms. He continued to chew until his mouth was empty.

"Geez, thanks...how nice of you to point that out." He sarcastically yet tiredly answered.

"I don't mean to be rude.. but you literally look like a corpse right now. Ich mach mir sorgen um dich."(I am worried about you) EU puts his hand on UN's shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze and rested it there.

"Yes, I know. I am glad that I have you to reminder me the importance of nutrition." UN smiled at him.

"Good. I also brought coffee, it might help you to keep your eyes open for now." He took out a thermos bottle of still hot coffee and pulled out two mugs and filled them up with coffee.

"Thanks.." UN took the mug and took a sip of the coffee.

EU took out his laptop and browsed through all the work they have and was a bit stunned by the amount UN had done all by himself over those past allnighters he had spent there. He sometimes wondered if UN was somekind of workingmachine who can work nonstop without anything but coffee and cigarettes. But looking at him now it wasn't the case, that poor being was clearly in need of food, sleep and company.

EU had also brought himself some breakfast. Three croissants, a regular sandwich and the coffee mentioned earlier. He started to eat those and organizing all the most time sensitive works to be done as soon as possible and others not so time sensitive to be done later.

EU didn't really understand why UN felt the need to work on weekends when everyone else was having a good time with their families or alone. Or why he was so focused on completing all this work alone and a far before they had their 'to due dates'.

He really had been feeling a bit left alone as UN was rarely home or up to anything they could do together as he was always tired or at work. He had mostly been talking to Germany as his brother still lived with him and UN.

EU decided to help UN out as much as he can even though they both have some works that are marked as ones which can be completed by any officer.

"UN, what do you think about if we were to finish this all before 3PM, would you feel up to do something with me?" He asked.

UN with half lidded eyes turned to look at him.

"...like what?" He took another sip of his coffee

"When was the last time you went outside e.g on a park?" EU asked him with a genuine interest on his tone.

"I...I honestly don't even remember, maybe a month ago?" He awkwardily admitted while still typing away on his laptop.

EU frowned.

"Well...that's not healthy. You are going out with me 3PM, no arguments." He told him while continuing to organize the works.

"Okay, sounds delightful." UN forced a tiny smile on his face while mentally screaming at himself how he cannot possibly finish his work by then.

"Don't smile if you don't feel like it. You don't have to pretend when you're with me." EU sadly pointed out.

"...you're right, sorry." He apologized and litted another cigarette.

EU felt a bit sad that UN still sometimes faked his emotions around him. But UN had gotten much better at expressing his genuine emotions around him than years ago.

"It's alright. How are you feeling?" He asked.

UN yawned and took a drag of his cigarette.

"Okay...I guess. A bit exhausted, torn...my complete body aches especially my legs."

"You probably need a break. Go and walk around a bit." EU suggested. He put his hands behind his neck and looked at UN who was seriously considering it as he rubbed his chin and had stopped typing.

"Yes, I will go for a walk." UN agreed and rose from his chair. His legs felt like they were trying kill him, they stung and he started to feel like his legs were about to give in.

He quickly put his hand on a wall in order to prevent himself from falling.

"I apparently rose up a bit too quickly." He pointed out.

EU shook his head and smiled. The lenght of UN's legs still surprised him after all those years together. He just was so fucking tall.

"You better go and have something more to eat as I am fairly certain that one baguette isn't going to last long." EU pointed out and poured himself another cup of coffee.

UN nodded and as he begun to walk he started to feel lightheaded. He had to yet again stop and take hold on wall.

"Uhh...I am not sure if I am able to walk...I feel so weak." UN tiredly admitted and he slowly started to slid down on the wall. Soon he was sitting on the floor.

EU looked at him with a very concerned expression.

"You really need to sleep." 

"...I know. But I can't, I still have work to do." UN whined.

"No, you don't. I am taking you home with me." EU had made up his mind and rose up from his chair.

UN didn't have any strenght to argue so he just nodded.

EU went over UN and helped him to stand up. He pulled a chair and made him sat on it.

"I'll grab my stuff and then we can do."

UN just nodded and watched as EU put all of his equipment back to his suitcase and turned UN's laptops off after saving all progess he had made.

Then he came back to UN.

"Are you well enough to walk if you lean on me?" He asked.

UN just shrugged.

"Maybe, I promise you that I try my best to." He tiredly answered.

EU nodded and gestured UN to stand up and to lean against him.

It was a bit difficult to support UN from falling as he was so much taller than EU. But it seemed to go just fine.

As they got to EU's car UN started to feel lightheaded again. He fought back as he didn't want to fall asleep or unconscious.

He tried his best to stay awake but the harder he fought the more tired he got.

"I...don't know how much longer I can stay awake." UN admitted with a sleepy frown.

EU looked at him as he was seated right beside him.

"Just stay up for couple of more minutes so I can drive us home." He adviced him before moving his eyes back to road.

UN nodded.

He looked out from the frontseat window and saw happy people hanging out and going to lunch as the time was about 11AM now. 

He was so tall that he had to bend his back and neck forward in order to fit in the car. It wasn't the ideal sitting position but the car wasn't just large enough to fit his tall body correctly.

Luckily their house wasn't far away but he started to feel like his body wasn't responding to his commands anymore, everything felt go limp and his eyes started to slowly shut.

"Stay awake, UN." EU poked him.

UN slightly flinched and his eyes opened a bit more.

"I'm trying..."

"I cannot carry you on my own if you fall asleep." EU sighed.

Even though UN weighed practically no more than a 170cm teenager he still was a way too tall to carry alone.

If UN was made of a solid material it would be easier but if he fell asleep his body would go completely limp and it wouldn't be healthy if his head were to hang feely and shake.

EU pulled on their driveway and parked his car on its usual spot. He exited the car and opened the frontseat door where UN was seated.

UN looked like he was about to fall unconscious as his eyes didn't seem to look at anything anymore.

EU snapped his fingers in front of UN's face. He again flinched and reacted to the sound.

"I'm...awake." He murmured.

"Okay, I will support your walking. Please get up." EU instructed.

UN hastily got up and almost fell over as a wave of dizzyness went through his body, but luckily EU catched him from falling.

As they got inside of the house. They heard Germany preparing something in the kitchen as he chopped some vegetables.

Germany noticed that someone or someones entered the house and went to greet them.

But as soon as he saw UN's condition and EU supporting him from falling, his face went on pure shock.

"...ist er okei?" (Is he okay) He asked.

EU shook his head.

"Nein, er hat seit Tagen überhaupt nicht geschlafen." (No, he hasn't slept in days) EU told him with a sad tone.

"Oh no...let me help you." Germany suggested and helped EU to support UN from collapsing.

They went to their bedroom to lay UN down on the bed. As he was now laying on the bed he looked so peaceful. He immediately fell asleep.

"How did I let this happen again to him." EU sighed.

"Don't blame yourself, it was him who didn't take care of himself." Germany reassured.

"Yes, but I feel like I should have done something more to prevent this from happening again." He sadly looked at Germany.

"As soon as he wakes up, we'll talk to him."

They exited the bedroom and Germany went back to the kitchen to continue what he was doing.

EU soon followed him.

"So...what are you making?" He asked.

"A pork noodle soup." Germany brightly announced.

EU shook his head and smiled. Germany has always been into cooking.

"Sounds good. But what about school?" He asked as he glanced at the time and wondered how much more time Germany had before the next lesson.

"Don't worry about it, I have the next lesson at 2:15PM." Germany told and continued to swirl the soup and adding the last vegetables to it.

EU nodded and went sitting on one of the dinner table chairs. He then pulled his laptop out and continued his work.

He wasn't going to go back to the office as he could do his work from home. 

He mentally facepalmed as he had forgotten to put on a note to the office door announcing that he wasn't there and that anyone in need of his help would need to call him.

But propably they were smart enough to call him without him specifically telling them to do so.

And then the first one called him.

Germany watched as his brother continued to work from home. He indeed was a busy man but nothing compared to UN who would work himself to ground every single time.

EU too had became a workaholic on those past few years as he had so many responsibilities and now that some of the member countries were going against the common rules they had previously agreed on as they joined the Union. But now EU had to almost constantly negotiate with them to change their attitude and to work together better. EU was obviously stressed about all those problems those countries were constantly giving him.

And now as the Brexit has been happened he was even more stressed. He had this constant fear of the member countries going against the rules they were all agreed on when they formed the Union. Germany had tried his best to help him manage all that stress but he could only do so much as to talk to him and getting him to open up about the current situation.

Working took up most of his days and weekends were the only days he could relax a bit and empty his mind of work.

He of course did empty his head sometimes at the weekdays but it was a result of drinking himself to the state that he didn't know anything about anymore. It helped him to reduce the stress but it also had concequences such as hangovers and weight gain. Germany tried to make the foods as healthy as possible with the help of his girlfriend Switzerland. But it didn't help much if EU continued to drink the amount he does and not to cut it down a little bit at least.

As Germany tested the soup if it was ready he heard the doorbell rang. He turned the stove off and put the soup away to cool down before answering the door.

EU didn't seem to notice the doorbell as he was on the phone talking to someone who apparently wasn't very nice to him as his facial expression was annoyed.

It was Switzerland.

"Hallo." She greeted him with a kiss.

"Hallo, come in." Germany smiled and let her in before closing the door.

She put her hands on Germany's waist and nose kissed him.

Germany just laughed and took her hand and leaded her to the kitchen.

She smelled the air and looked pleased.

"Noodle soup, I assume?" 

"Yes, a pork one. Are you hungry?" He asked her.

"Yes, I didn't eat at the cafeteria as I knew you propably had made food." She smiled and took the lid off from the soup.

Germany watched her inspecting the soup and began to set the table.

The dinner table was huge so at other end could fit the plates, glasses and cutlery. And at the another end someone could have their working equipment on and it wouldn't be in a way of eating.

He then turned to EU who still was on the phone, now talking Italian.

"Che cosa vuoi dire che non sei d'accordo?" (What do you mean you disagree?) He sternly asked.

He then listened to an angry voice of Italy yelling st him and just sighed.

"Ne parleremk più tardi.." (We'll talk about it later..)He told Italy and ended the call.

He then pinched his nosebridge.

"Sheiße.."

Both Germany and Switzerland looked at him with a grin.

"What did he want, it sounded pretty intense?" He jokingly asked.

EU looked at him with unreadable expression.

"He wanted to get an extended time to pay off his loans." He deadpanned.

"What did you tell him?"

"I told him that we will talk about it later. I cannot talk to a person who won't listen and is only yelling at me." He sighed and continued his work.

"Shall we eat?" Switzerland asked.

Germany nodded and EU was about to say something as his phone rang again and he answered to it.

"Yes?" He asked.

"Hei, niistä maataloustuista, olisiko sinulla hetki aikaa?" (Hey, about the agricultural supports, do you have a moment?) Finland asked.

"Kyllä, mitä niistä?" (Yes, what about it?) He asked.

"Mietin vain, että kun on nyt niin kuiva vuosi ollut. Ja vilja ei kasva kunnolla, ei taida tulla täyttä satoa tänävuonna. Joudun luultavasti ostamaan viljaa muualta, miten verotusasiat sen kanssa?" (I was just wondering, because this year has been so dry. And the wheat isn't growning as it is supposed to, it looks like I am unable to harvest as much wheat as I need to. I propably will need to buy wheat from another country, how do I tax it?" Finland asked.

EU was silent for a moment as he had to translate everything in his head as he wasn't that good at speaking Finnish language.

"Noudatat vain tuontitavaroissa käytettävää verotusta ja vähennät siitä sen, miten paljon maataloustukia saat. Ehdotan kääntymistä verotoimiston puoleen." (You only follow the tax on imported goods and deduct from it how much agricultural support you receive. I suggest that you ask more from the Finnish tax office.) He instructed with an obvious german accent.

"Okei, kiitos." (Okay, thank you.) The Finn thanked and ended the call.

EU put his hand on his temple and felt the headache starting to form. He hated how much work it does to communicate with the member countries which has less common languages. He masters all of the languages in his Union but it still takes much effort to properly translate all they say as they just fucking continue to speak nonstop.

He then took the plate and begun to eat. He felt very stressed.

Germany was happily chatting with Switzerland. He was glad that Germany had someone he truly liked. That poor boy had been dumped by not so nice people so many times before.

Switzerland looked at EU who was obviously very stressed but tried to ignore the feeling as he continued to type with one of his hands and eating the noodle soup at another as he was using chopsticks. He looked like he just wanted to finish all the work he had as soon as possible. 

"Are you alright?" She asked him.

EU didn't first move his eyes from the screen at all.

"Yes..just stressed that's all." But then he took a quick glance at her by moving his eyes from the screen to her and then back at it.

"Maybe you should eat with peace?" She suggested.

"It's difficult but possible. I'll try." He sighed and focused his attention fully on eating

As he had ate for a while and was beginning to calm down a bit his phone rang again. As he was going to answer it Switzerland took it and rejected the call.

"They need to know about the concept of a lunch break." She smiled.

EU wasn't very pleased but didn't argue about it, but he still checked who the caller was. It was Sweden. He sent him a message telling that he'll call him back in 30 minutes.

"Have set up a time window when you only respond to people calling to you?" Switzerland asked.

"Yes, from 9:30AM to 3PM Mon to Fri. If someone needs to make a contact with me they'll need to email me and I answer them as soon as possible if they're marked urgent...and the less urgent ones I'll answer when I have time." He sighed and told her with a bit tired tone.

"Well...that's not the worst possible choice but one question...why do you not have an assistant who can handle the calls?" She asked.

"Mainly the reason is that it's very hard to find an assistant who is able to speak every language my Union has or has the ability to remember every law and term by heart." He told her as he finished eating.

"You remember every law your Union has?" She looked at him with disbelief.

"Yes, I have eidetic memory. Once I read or saw something I remember it for a very long time." He explained and filled his mug with coffee.

Germany looked at her and explained that one reason EU gets easily stressed is because he remembers every single piece of work which is undone or has a time sensitive mark on it.

She felt bad for him.

"I'm feeling awful that you have to remember practically everything."

EU sighed.

"It's tolerable but annoying."

Switzerland checked the time and it was 12:47PM. They had about an hour before they have to get back to the school.

Luckily their campus wasn't far, about 3 kilometres. Germany usually ate at home as it saved money not to eat every time at the cafeteria even though the food didn't cost much. About 4,5-7€ a meal. But Germany always insisted that he would make the food and Switzerland had nothing against it.

"So, Germany. What shall we do in the meantime?" She asked.

"I have homework on English and you have on Mathematics, we might start working on those." He suggested.

"Sounds good."

They cleared the table and put the dishes on the dishwasher.

EU continued his work and called to Sweden.

As Germany and Switzerland begun to head upstairs She quickly grabbed her backpack with her.

Germany's room was upstairs. 

Upstairs there was a small lobby where he had his PS4 and a TV. The walls were white and the floor was made of oak wood. The couch was blue and it had a few decorative pillows on it which were gray and white. 

From the ceiling was a enormous glass and crystal chandelier.

Germany had a massive amount of houseplants. A huge snake plant, a japanese palm tree, a yucca palm, many types of succulents, an aloë vera, a peace lily, some exotic plants such as a magician flower and a wild banana.

His bedroom was also full of plants. He had a red medium sized bed, black curtains, white walls with yellow horizontal stripes, yellow rugs lying on the oak floor. He had a small bookcase on one corner and a schooltable by one of his windows. He had four windows and he had some plants hanging from the ceiling.

They sat on the bed and took their books out. English homework wasn't that diffucult as he needed to translate some sentences from German to English.

Switzerland's homework was a bit harder as it was Mathematics, geometry. Specifically parables.

She didn't like parables at all. But luckily Germany did know how to they worked as he begun to teach her.

As they had almost finished their homework they heard EU calling them.

"The time is a bit over 2PM, didn't you two had a class or something?" He asked.

"Oh shit!" They both exlaimed.

They quickly grabbed their stuff and went downstairs.

"I could give you a lift as I need to start my business & economy class at there as well." He offered.

EU teaches those subjects at the College and at University as he needs to educate his member countries about those two subjects.

"That's awesome!" Switzerland smiled.

"Okay, but have you drank today?" Germany asked.

"No. Not yet." He smirked and grabbed his stuff and car keys.

As they three exited the house EU's phone rang yet again. 

He was a bit annoyed but answered nevertheless. It was France.

"Germany, you drive." He instructed and gave the keys to him, and continued to speak French and seated himself at the front.

Germany took the keys and started the car, Switzerland occupied one of the back seats.

As he drove he glanced at the annoyed EU who tried his best to understand what the fuck France wanted but couldn't as she talked so fast and started to yell.

"Vous parles trop vite, vous devez m'envoyer votre problème par email." (You speak too fast, you must send me your problem by email.) He sighed and ended the call.

"Fucking France..." He murmured.

"I hope the class is peaceful today." Germany smiled.

EU looked very annoyed but nods.

"But I am pretty sure I need a drink after it, the students usually are pretty irritable."

"Are you saying WE are irritable?" He asked with a fake frown meaning himself and Switzerland.

EU smiled and gently punched Germany on the shoulder.

"Good one."


	3. College

As Germany pulled EU's car on the parking lot the time was 2:12PM so they were in a bit of a hurry.

EU and the two parted their ways as Germany and Switzerland had a Biology class and EU had his class to teach. 

The teens hurriedly went to the classroom door and were relieved that it was still open.

They seated themselves at the front as they liked Biology very much. The reason why Swiss and Germany had the same Biology classes together was because Swiss had saved all Biology classes for her last year because she wanted to study them with Germany. As she was 22 and Germany 18. 

And Germany had chosen to take all Biology classes on his first year of College.

The teacher was ASEAN. She was pretty nice. And chill. 

As she entered the classroom the whole class went silent as they weren't pricks. She was wearing her usual formal clothing.

"Good afternoon." She greeted.

The students responded to her greet and she started to count who was absent and who had attented.

"Apparently China is absent today, what a shame." She told herself.

"Today's subject is about insect methamorphosis and their lifecycle." She announced and started to show on a dataprojector a photo of a Monarch butterfly and all its stages. An egg, a caterpillar, a chrysalis, an adult butterfly and the dead one.

Germany took notes and Switzerland drew the pictures the teacher showed. Together they made a pretty amazing team to make notes for the tests.

As the class ended time was 3:15PM. They went to listen EU's class from the outside. They were sitting on the bench the on hallway and listened him talk.

EU's class always lasted very long as he had to stop his sentences as one of the students were always asking questions or making some noise. Or his phone rang.

Then after 30 more minutes they heard him say: 

Class dismissed.

Then about 25 students exited the classroom and started chatting with each other.

Then EU came out and the first he looked very annoyed and then tired.

"I need a drink.."

"Okay, shall we go to the bar?" Germany asked.

"Absolutely, but either of you cannot drink as we need to get home too." EU told them as they walked down the hallway.

"I am not going to drink on a Monday." Switzerland stated.

"Me neither, so you got two good drivers." Germany smiled.

EU nodded, and as they exited the building he got a text message. It was from UN.

"Where did you go?" UN asked.

"I had to go and teach on the Campus, I'll head to the bar now. I'll be back at 8PM at the very latest." EU answered.

"Okay, how did your day go?" UN asked.

"It was stressful but don't worry about it, you need to rest and eat." EU answered.

"Okay, see you at the bar ;)." UN responded.

EU then put his phone away and sighed. What a long stressful day. He let Germany drive as he was too stressed and didn't want to risk anything. EU then thought about what UN had said... UN drinking wasn't excactly the best idea.

As they drove to the bar they saw Russia fighting with his father on the street. It looked pretty intense.

"Hey, hold up. What the fuck is going on with those guys?" Switzerland asked and got everyone's attention.

"Let's see why they are fighting." EU requested.

So Germany pulled the car on the edge of the street and they all exited the car.

"Чспойкойся!" (Calm down!) Soviet yelled.

Russia was trying to kick his father off as Soviet had grabbed Russia and was now holding him stable.

"Отпусти меня!" (Let me go!) Russia begged.

But Soviet's grip was too strong and eventually they both calmed down.

"What was that all about?" EU asked.

Soviet and Russia turned to look at him and spotted Germany and Switzerland too.

"Ah...it vas just a little...disagrrreement, yes." Soviet explained, obviously annoyed.

"Didn't look like one to me. You were fighting." EU pointed out.

"I got angrry and I hit my fatherr and he trried to kalm me dovn." Russia explained.

"Okay, are you guys alright?" Switzerland asked.

"I'm okay." Russia answered.

"I feel kompletely fine." Soviet flipped them off and walked away. He didn't want to be with anyone at the moment.

Everyone else were just staring at him leave.

"Russia, do you perhaps want to join us to the bar?" Germany asked.

"Surre, thanks." He shyly smiled.

"Germany, you need to park my car to a more approvable location, and as the bar isn't far we will walk to it." EU pointed out.

They all agreed, Germany moved the car and then they started to head to the bar. Then they spotted UN who waved at them. He looked very tired but he was in a better condition than in the morning.

EU frowned a bit.

"You really shouldn't drink tonight, you need to rest."

UN sadly smiled.

"I am not going to drink much, I just wanted to be with you." He admitted and embraced EU.

EU felt his face heat a bit up. He had missed physical contact with UN. They both had so busy lives they rarely got moments together.

"Very kind of you, but we shall enter the bar now. Everyone else has already gotten inside." EU pointed out.

UN took out his pack of cigarettes and pulled one out and placed it on his lips and lit it.

"I need to smoke first, then we can go." UN took a drag of his cigarette.

EU nodded and in the meantime he answered some of the emails which were marked as time sensitive. And made a few calls.

As UN had smoked his cigarette and dumped it to the trash can he poked EU to his shoulder.

"I'm ready." He smiled.

EU nodded and put his phone away.

"How long did you sleep?" He asked.

"Uhh...maybe 4 hours? Hey, I feel just fine." He tried to assure but his balance yet again told EU otherwise as UN almost collapsed as a wave of exhaustion hit him.

"I don't believe you." EU shook his head.

"I will sleep more when we get home, I promise." He offered.

EU sighed but nodded.

UN smiled and took EU by his hand and they went inside the bar.

Germany, Switzerland and Russia were already seated and they were ordering their drinks.

"Shall we go with them or have our own table?" EU asked UN.

"We can go on a date another time, let's go with them." UN smiled and winked at EU.

EU nodded and they joined the teens.

The teens didn't mind their company at all. Germany ordered a non-alcoholic beer, Switzerland ordered a coffee and Russia ordered vodka shots.

UN ordered a Long Island Iced Tea (22%). EU didn't like the idea of UN getting very drunk despite how tall he was he was still very skinny and strong alcohols got him to the ground very fast.

And the fact that he was in a such exhausted state, drinking would definitely cause him to get drunk faster.

EU ordered two beers as he decided to not get too drunk as he had to make sure UN didn't get completely wasted.

They all watched as Russia drowned the shots he ordered with an alarming speed. As he had drank all the 14 shots he ordered, at first he didn't seem to be that drunk but after a couple of minutes he had hard time to stay sitting up as his body started to get a bit limp.

Germany and Switzerland shook their heads as they watched how Russia's condition worsened right before their eyes.

EU looked a bit horrified.

Then Russia whined a bit.

"Please...don't brring me back to ma fatherr, he'll be mad at me. He hates drrunk people." He begged.

EU looked at UN.

"We cannot bring him back to his father, we have no idea how Soviet would react to him being at this state."

UN nodded.

"You're right. Russia, you can go with us, we will put you a mattress on Germany's room." He then drowned his drink at one go. EU didn't look pleased.

Russia looked a bit calmer and he nodded.

"You'll going to be wasted..." Germany pointed at UN with a bit concerned expression.

UN shook his head.

"No, I'll be fine."

"You weren't fine the last time you drowned that same drink..." EU muttered.

Germany and UN laughed.

"I know, but I was already drunk the last time before I even ordered that drink." UN smiled.

EU frowned.

Switzerland shook her head.

"I am unable to understand to why you are getting drunk on a Monday."

They all laughed.

As they all had finished their drinks the time was 7:29PM.

"We shall go to home as I have an excellent idea what to cook!" Germany excitely announced.

They all nodded and left the bar.

"So, who is going to drive?" UN asked and as he walked he almost collapsed.

EU caught him just in time and prevented him from falling to the ground.

UN realized how bad his condition was and an obvious regret was shown on his face.

Switzerland smiled.

"I can." 

Germany gave her the keys and he was supporting the drunk Russian with EU as Russia had trouble keeping up his posture.

UN sighed as he had to yet again squeeze himself to the front seat.

"I fucking hate small cars..." He muttered.

"No can do." EU deadpanned and seated Russia to the middle seat at the back and seated himself right next to him. Germany was on the another side.

As Swiss started the car and was driving she heard Russia complaining about EU's halo.

"Turrrn that thing off, it's a vay too brright!"

"I cannot just 'turn it off', it turns off if I am unconscious or asleep." EU annoyngly explained.

Russia frowned but didn't say a word.

Germany and EU looked at each other and they silently agreed that Germany would take care of Russia and EU would talk to UN.

As they got home Germany and Switzerland supported Russia and placed him on Germany's bed in the meantime as they took out another mattress from the closet and made Russia a bed on the floor.

As the teens were upstairs EU took UN's hand and leaded him to the kitchen and gestured him to sit down.

EU looked at UN with a bit sad expression.

"What's going on with you, UN." He softly asked and folded his arms.

UN looked a bit anxious.

"...wha -What do you mean?" He asked.

"You are obviously suffering, I can see it." EU sat right beside UN and hugged him.

UN started to sob.

"I..I just feel like I am not...enough."

"Why would you think that?" 

"I am unable to solve the current wars which are going on...I am useless." UN felt as tears started to dwell on his eyes.

"No no no, you're not useless. I know that you're trying your best. And that's enough. You cannot be better if you're already the best at what you're doing." EU explained and rubbed UN's back softly. EU didn't like how he could feel UN's backbone and his ribs through his turtleneck. He had to do something about it.

"I...just feel so lost." And then his tears broke and started to fall down.

"It's alright, I'll help you to find your way." EU took out a handkerchief and gave it to UN who took it and begun to wipe his eyes.

Then UN whimpered as his arms started to hurt again. Then he remembered that he had somewhen at the bar accidentally reopened some of his cuts as he had stretched his arms a bit, and now his sleeves had been a bit stained from the blood.

He really hoped that EU wouldn't notice as he had promised him that he wouldn't cut daily anymore. But as EU would find out sooner or later he decided to confess.

"I have betrayed my promise...I am sorry." He started to shiver.

EU changed the hug to an embrace.

"Have you cutted yourself again?" He carefully asked.

UN nodded and rolled his sleeves up and under them were extremely bloody bandages.

"I am not angry at you, but right now we need to clean those cuts." EU gently rubbed his thumb on UN's cheek.

UN nodded and stood up and went to the bathroom followed by EU who called Germany to prepare the food he earlier mentioned.

As they were in the bathroom EU locked the door and turned the lights on.

UN took his bandages off and there were hundreds of new cuts which he had made last week and today. And thousands of old and white scars. UN was very embarassed and couldn't dare to look EU in the eyes. 

EU sighed.

"Hey, it's alright. Let's just clean them and then talk about how we can find ways for you to the very least reduce the cutting a bit." EU placed his hand on UN cheek again and looked at him to the eyes.

UN seeing that EU really wasn't angry at him he felt a bit calmer.

Not that EU had ever done anything bad to him, EU had always done everything he could to help UN.

EU took out a bottle of isopropanol which was an antiseptic alcohol and a piece of cotton, and started to gently tap down on UN's arm to clean out all the blood first and then the cuts.

After all the cuts were clean EU suggested that UN should take a shower as he hadn't been at home for a week.

UN nodded and was taking his clothes off as EU brought him a towel.

"But as you are much more drunk than me and as you can get dizzy I'll stay here just in case." EU explained with a tiny smirk on his face.

UN smiled a bit and didn't disagree as EU's argument actually made sense.

But as EU noticed how fucking skinny UN was his smirk faded instantly. He looked like he was mainly made of bone and skin.

"...you have lost weight." EU commented with a sad tone.

"I know... but I assure you I am trying to get better." UN sighed and turned the shower on.

UN accidentally got EU's clothes wet with the shower and EU flinched at the water.

"...wha?"

"Sorry." UN apologized with a blush as he turned the shower off and begun to shampoo himself.

"It seems like I am going to have to join you." He smirked and went to get a towel for himself.

UN grinned.

As EU came back he was holding the towel on his left hand while naked and UN was completely covered in shampoo.

"Doesn't it sting your cuts to get shampoo on them?" He disbelievingly asked.

"No, I have saved them from shampoo, see?" UN shoved EU that his arms were completely rid of shampoo. The angry red lines on them looked a bit upsettling but EU didn't push it as UN looked relaxed.

"Nice." EU smugly smiled and closed the bathroom door again.

He hung his towel and turned the shower back on.

EU took a shampoo bottle and started to shampoo himself.

UN rinsed his body and glanced at EU.

"You have gained weight." He pointed out.

"Nein, you just haven't seen me naked for a while." EU smirked and continued to shampoo himself.

"Sure sure..." UN poked him and smiled.

"I am trying not to." EU a bit annoyedly announced.

UN splashed some water on EU and giggled.

EU looked at him a bit dumbfounded.

"Aren't we a bit old for this?" He slyly asked.

UN was always very playish when he was in a good mood. It was a rare trait to be seen on him. UN usually was very depressed and dull looking.

"Maybe, but why does it matter." UN laughed and started to squirt more water on EU.

"You seem to be in a good mood." EU pointed out.

"Of course I am, I am with you!" UN smiled and embraced EU.

He looked EU into his eyes. His glasses were a bit sprayed by the water. The darkness on his eyes was intoxiating as he looked a bit scary. Glowing golden rings on black eyeballs. And a glowing halo, UN too had a glowing halo but his one was bright white, EU's one was golden.

He looked so beautiful.

Then he kissed him.

EU felt his face heat up once more but nevertheless responded to the kiss and placed his hands on UN's waist.

Then UN began to gently kiss EU's neck.

EU started to shiver and then UN bit him.

EU begun to moan a bit.

"Hhh..that's going to...hhh..leave a mark." He breathed.

UN then stopped and just kissed EU on the lips again.

"We can continue this later, I'm starting to feel cold." UN requested as he was now shaking and his skin had goosebumps.

EU shook his head and smiled.

"Sure, but we should dry ourselves out and see if Germany had prepared anything to eat."

UN nodded and turned the shower off and walked to his towel. He dried himself on a towel before wrapping it around himself.

EU dried the floor and turned the ventilation to the max as the steamy air needed to be removed to ensure no mold would start growing.

He then grabbed his towel and dried himself on it as well. He then wrapped the towel around himself too.

He took a clean bandage roll out from the medical cabinet and gestured UN to dry his arms out so he could bandage his arms.

UN gently tapped the water away with a smaller towel and offered his now dried arms to EU.

EU carefully wrapped bandages around UN's arms and tucked the ends under the bandages to ensure it would stay in place.

They then exited the bathroom and closed the door, and as they were walking to their bedroom they saw Germany and Switzerland in the kitchen chopping ingredients and throwing them at the ceramic pot with an impressive speed. They looked wicked.

EU rolled his eyes and ignored them, and opened the bedroom door. UN just looked at them amazed and tried to steal a glimpse of what they were making but EU took his arm and led him into the bedroom.

Germany was chopping cucumbers and paprikas into tiny pieces. As he had a bit too much ingredients on his chopping board he started to throw them into the pot. 

Swiss had halted her chopping as she was now frying onion on a frying pan. After the onion was golden colored she added paprikas and tomatoes to it plus adding 2dl of water to it.

She them poured some rice to it and added beans.

Germany prepared the taco breads and started to bake them. He loved to bake bread and pastries almost as much as he loved to cook. France had mentored him on cooking and he was grateful to that.

And then Swiss needed to add some salsa to the pot and went to the fridge and opened it. And as she opened it she saw that there was a ridiculous amount of beer, covering almost 25% of all space.

"Uhh...Germany?" She awkwardily asked.

"Ja?" 

"Why is there so much beer?" She grinned and just stared at him.

Germany just shrugged.

"Well...I like beer and EU likes beer, so why not to store it?"

"How much do you drink?" She a bit concerned asked.

Germany was a bit humiliated by the question as it was obvious that he wasn't drinking much.

"Not much, sometimes on the weekends." He answered and continued to mix the pot ingredients.

"Okay, so it's not you who have drank all those?" She asked and pointed at the kitchen counter which was full of empty beer bottles.

"No, it's EU. He sometimes drinks daily but luckily on rare occasions gets wasted." Germany sighed but smiled.

"...I see." She replied and took the salsa bucket from the fridge and added 4 tbs of salsa to the pot.

Germany felt a bit offended but tried to ignore it as he didn't want to start fight. Swiss sometimes unitentionally offended people without realizing it. But it was okay as she always apologized when she noticed what she had done.

"Oh sheiße Germany, I'm so sorry..." She gasped as she realized her mistake.

"It's alright." 

"No it's not. I shouldn't outright blame you without checking the facts first." She seemed to be genuinely sorry.

Germany sighed and pulled her to a hug.

"I'm glad you realized that, but I am not mad at you." He promised. 

"Shall we finish this food..or?" She asked.

"Oh, yes. Of course!" He quickly went back to the pot and started to mix it. Swiss smiled and begun to set the table.

Russia had passed out as soon as he was layed on Germany's bed, so Swiss and Germany had to lift him up and place on his mattress on the floor. They had taken his ushanka and jacket off so he wouldn't overheat and neatly placed them on a chair next to the mattress.

He was snoring upstairs and mumbling something in Russian.

"I am a bit worried about Russia." 

Germany looked a bit sad.

"Me too, I am wondering what's going on with him and Soviet."

"Yes. Did you see his arms?" Swiss a bit horrified asked.

"Yeah, I think he still cuts himself."

"Still? Are you two close or something?"

"Not very close but I think we're friends. I've known him since elementary school and I think he started to cut himself at the age of... maybe 13?" Germany told her.

"Do you think Soviet is the cause for that?" She asked.

"I have a great suspicion about it as well."

They didn't notice that UN and EU had been listening their conversation, as they have been sitting by the dinner table for a while as EU had showed UN how he had organized all their work. 

UN was wearing a gray long sleeved turtleneck and blue trousers accompanied by black socks.

EU was wearing a white t-shirt and black trousers, he didn't have socks on. He felt like it was useless to try and cover up the love bite on his neck as he didn't have anything to hide. Their relationship was common knowledge.

EU had managed to organize their work so UN didn't 'need' to be at work every single day and night. He had also made sure UN's daily working list isn't too long.

UN was impressed but was mentally screaming as he was afraid he couldn't possibly finish all the needed work on time if he couldn't do as much work as possible. He would feel like he had betrayed everyone if he didn't always be at work and try his best to solve all the violence in the world.

He needed to somehow find a loophole and to continue his work as usual but at the same time he didn't want to disappoint EU.

UN fake smiled at EU who frowned at him.

EU hated to see UN faking his expressions or emotions to him as he would always know when he does that.

They had secretly been listening to Germany and Swiss' conversation about 5 minutes now.

Then Germany noticed them.

"Oh, didn't see you there." He awkwardily announced.

EU rolled his eyes again.

"Nice to see that I'm not the only one who needs to get stronger lenses." He sarcastically replied with a smirk.

Germany felt his face getting hot.

Swiss started to laugh at him.

UN grinned and decided to go for a smoke. As he stood up he yet again felt dizzy but luckily no-one noticed and he slyly exited the house.

"Hey, my eyesight isn't even that bad...not that I don't need to get my eyes checked though." Germany defended himself with a sad smile.

EU slightly frowned.

"My statement was a joke but nevertheless, have you had difficulties with your current lenses?" He asked.

"A bit, yes." Germany sadly admitted.

"You need to organize an appointement then." EU sighed.

Germany was sad and nodded before he begun to smirk.

"Is that a... love bite?" He looked at EU who's dark blue face went red like there was a switch being pulled.

EU looked a bit uneasy.

"Yes, and it's none of your business." He didn't have to the mood to be angry as he had just been bited.

Germany just laughed and shook his head.

As Swiss had set the table, Germany placed the pot on the table while Swiss brought the taco breads.

"The food is ready." She gladly announced.


	4. Broken Promises

UN was having his smoke break sitting on a chair on their back yard. The conversarion between him and EU still fresh in mind.

_When EU had leaded UN to their bedroom and they dressed up, UN felt like there was something bothering EU._   
_"Hey, if it's about my cutting..." He a bit anxiously offered._

_EU sighed._   
_"There has to be a way to reduce it." He came closer to UN._

_"...I have tried not to cut when I get the feeling that I have to cut, but I always end up doing it anyways." UN defeately admitted._

_"Tell me more about the feeling?" EU requested._

_"It's... usually very crippling, it wears me out and I sometimes pass out due to it..." UN folded his arms and looked at the floor._

_"I sometimes loose the sense of reality and it feels like...the time stops. And at the some point...my arms start to itch and tingle, the feeling won't go away unless I cut." UN sadly explained._

_"What triggers the feeling?" EU asked._

_"If there is something I cannot do, or anything I am unable to stop. The current war between Israel and Palestine is currently the main cause to the feeling." UN explained and begun to slowly slide down the wall as his legs gave in._

_EU caught UN and gestured him to sit on the bed._

_"It's the feeling of uselessness, it usually gets bad if something horrible continues because I am unable to put an end to it."_

_"What is the side cause then?" EU asked._

_"It's the feeling that I am not enough and my work is not enough. And that I am not enough to anyone -excluding you." UN closed his eyes and leaned against EU, who was sitting right beside him._

_"You are enough, you'll have to learn that." EU sighed and rubbed UN's back._

_"...it's hard to believe that." UN slightly whimpered._

_"It'll get easier, I will help you."_

UN took the last drag of his cigarette before stumping it on the ashtray which was right beside the chair, on the ground.

UN hated to be a burden to anyone, he felt like he shouldn't bother EU with his problems. But it seemed that EU wouldn't quit asking and caring until he told EU everything.

It was a good thing and a bad thing at the same time.

If he told EU everything, EU could try and help him to feel better. But if he told EU everything, he couldn't keep anything secret or to continue his work as usual.

EU always hated how much work UN does, but UN felt like the more work he did the more he helped people. And if he wasn't working, he would feel like he had betrayed everyone and left people alone with their miseries.

The more he tried to hide, the more suspicious EU would get and the more secrets he had to abandon.

The fact that he actually liked to hurt himself was a bit upsettling even to him. He knew that he had cut himself multiple times today already and the time was about 9PM but he couldn't resist it.

He took out a light purple knife from his pocket and rolled his left sleeve a bit up and opened the bandage to reveal a bit skin. As the blade dug his skin it felt... _good_. He made the first cut, then a second, then the seventh and then he stopped. He sighed in relief as the feeling was intoxiating.

The good feeling was very addictive, there was very few things that he liked or which felt good. He usually just felt miserable.

If he were to tell EU about the addictive side effect, he would get in much bigger trouble. But if he told EU the cause for his cutting was only from the wars and conflicts accompanied by a feeling of uselessness.

He could propably get away with it. At least for a while.

He put the bandage back on and watched as it slowly stained with blood. The cuts weren't very deep as he didn't want EU to somehow notice or sense the blood. He then pulled the sleeve back down and litted another cigarette.

He felt lucky that he had already pulled his sleeve down as the door opened and Germany came out.  
"Hey, the food is ready." He called.

"Thank you, I will attend you as soon as I can." UN fake smiled and took a drag of his cigarette.

Germany nodded and went back inside.

UN sighed and very slowly inhaled the smoke and kept it inside for a while until slowly releasing it. Smoking was also one thing which gave him pleasure.

When the 51 states formed him, Poland gave him a cigar and as he inhaled the smoke for the first time, he knew he wouldn't stop inhaling it.

UN had never been a child, as he came to be he was already an adult. He had never experienced childhood nor had he ever had a family. Now he kinda has a family, EU and Germany.

The 51 states who formed him weren't excactly his family as they weren't very close nor were there to guide him.

The ones who guided him were The Great Britain, France, Poland and Spain. The rest were just giving him work and issues to solve. The amount of work he had always had was a far more than any of the states were doing.

They basically just dumped their work on him and expected him to do them all just fine. They dominated him and kept him busy.

But as soon as they realized that the UN they had created was a living being just as they were, their attitude changed. They tried to give him less work and time to sleep and to eat. But the damage had already been done. UN had became an extreme workaholic. He always felt obligated to be as productive as possible and not to allow himself any time to fulfill his physical needs.

He didn't know that there were more to live than just work, he had always done work and everyone had required him to do so.

The first time UN collapsed due starvation and exhaustion was the breakingpoint. The states agreed that one of them would always be with UN to ensure he stays alive and manages to keep up his appearance on important meetings. And to maintain his health.

And at the some point he started to feel like he wasn't enough even though he did more work than anyone. The way his another form of his self-harm, cutting has been formed was an accident.

He accidently cutted himself on a finger as he sliced tomatoes and the feeling he got was good. He realized that he liked the feeling it caused. He tested the knife on his arm and he instantly fell in love with it.

Every time he felt awful he would cut himself and not feel awful anymore, for a while at least.

It became an addiction for him.

At some point the Great Britain noticed his cutting. At first he didn't say anything about it but as soon as he realized how badly his cutting had gotten out of hand he intervened.

He had tried to reason with him to quit it but UN only told him that it helped him and that he would ask for help if he felt it was too much.

The Britain wasn't convinced and kept a close eye on him but UN had became more secretive and it was harder for UK to keep on track how much UN cutted himself.

UN's rememberance got interrupted as his cigarette ended.

He then rose up from the chair and went back inside.

He looked around and saw that Germany and EU were still eating and drinking beer. Switzerland was chattering with them.

And then a smell of smoke entered the room and Switzerland looked up and saw UN who suspiciously looked at the food.

She smirked.

UN seated himself next to EU and glanced at the food.  
"What is it?" He asked.

EU rolled his eyes.  
"You haven't seen a taco bread before, have you?" He smirked.

UN shook his head.  
"No, but now I have." He deadpanned and took one with his right hand and placed it on his plate and then took some sauce and neatly stuffed the bread with it.

UN looked at the bread.  
"How do I eat this?" He awkwardily asked.

Everyone else facepalmed.

UN face went red.  
"Hey, I have never eaten a food like this before." He defended himself.

"You can either bite on it or use fork and a knife." Germany instructed.

"Okay."

He neatly sliced the bread into even pieces and EU watched as UN had sliced it perfectly.  
"You know how much I like perfect things, thank you." EU smiled and finished his beer.

UN just nodded and tasted the bread. He didn't like it at all but didn't want to disappoint Germany.  
"Very nice texture." He complimented and slightly fake smiled.

EU shook his head but luckily Germany didn't notice it.

Even though UN absolutely hated the meal he still ate all of what he had taken. He had agreed on eating more and now that EU was watching him he had no escape but to eat.

UN's left hand ached from the cutting and he did his best not to train any attention to it. EU would be so disappointed on him.

And now that the cause couldn't be the wars as he had previously told him, he would have to invent a new excuse.

Then another wave of tiredness washed his body the dizzyness came back. He had hard time to keep his head up.

They all noticed.

"You need to sleep." EU commanded.

UN shook his head.  
"No, not yet. I still have stuff to do." He tried to resist.

"No you don't. You have to sleep, 4 hours isn't enough." EU frowned.

"Fine." UN agreed and as he stood up his balance betrayed him.

Germany caught him on time as he was going to collect the dishes.  
"You need to be more careful." He kindly told him.

But as the Germany caught him he grabbed him on the left hand and UN flinched and hissed in pain. He was doomed.  
"Please not so firmly, I am sensitive." He whined.

EU eyed him suspiciously.

Germany looked sad and loosened his grip but as soon as he did so UN's sleeve was stained with blood.  
"You're bleeding!"

Then EU came closer and gestured UN to follow him.

UN looked defeated but didn't argue.

They went to their bedroom and EU closed the door.  
"What happened?" He a bit tiredly asked.

"The recent wounds must have re-opened as they are still fresh." UN explained. He lied.

EU nodded.  
"We or you need to bandage them more thickly in order to prevent that from happening." He suggested.

UN agreed.  
"Yes, I will do so." He nodded and exited the bedroom and was on his way to the bathroom when Germany and Swiss stopped him.

They looked worried.  
"Are you okay?" Germany asked.

"Yes, don't worry." UN tried to convince them.

"Are you cutting yourself?" Switzerland suddenly asked.

UN's face paled.  
"...no?" He tried to sound convincing.

They looked at him with very concerned expressions.  
"I don't believe you." Swiss eyed UN's left hand suspiciously.

UN sighed.  
"Fine. Yes, I cut myself." He deadpanned.

"...but, why?" She asked.

"It's none of your concern." He a bit firmly told them.

"We know, but we care about you." They both hugged him.

UN's annoyed expression softened and he let them hug his abdomen. It felt nice that someones cared for him.  
"...I am sorry that I was a bit firm to you, I know that you mean well..." UN sincerely apologized.

"We understand, but please don't cut yourself." Germany and Swiss begged him.

UN sighed.  
"I can't promise but I'll try not to."

"You need to promise in order to get better." Swiss stated.

"...I promise." UN tiredly lied to them.

Swiss and Germany nodded and pulled their arms away. UN awkwardily grinned as they looked at his starved body.

As they were about to comment on it UN shot them a deathly glare. Germany and Swiss didn't push it and continued to clean the table and to wash the dishes.

UN quickly escaped to the bathroom and locked the door.

He shouldn't have promised them to not cut as he couldn't possibly keep it. He took his turtleneck off and tossed it aside.

He looked at himself on the bathroom mirror and grimaced as he saw how deathly skin he was. Every bone he had was clearly visible. Only his face looked normal.

He looked at himself with disgust, he hated how skinny he was.

He then looked at his arms, completely bandaged arms.

His eyes looked very dull, his usually bright eyes were almost gray.

He had destroyed himself.

A wave of depression filled his body and mind.

He wanted to drink, he wanted to cut, he wanted to just disappear. He hated himself a way too much.

He slid down on the wall to the floor and his eyes formed tears.

He took out a bottle of 80% vodka from its hidden place and opened the cork. He took a sip and loved how it burned his throat.

He begun to drink it like it was water and at some point he started to feel better. He decorked the bottle and hid it again.

Alcohol always helped him to rid himself of bad and depressive thoughts.

He stood up and bandaged his arm better. His balance wasn't very good caused by earlier dizzyness and now alcohol, and he almost tripped a few times.

He took the turtleneck with him but didn't wear it.

As he exited the bathroom he saw Austria entering the house.

Austria usually visited Germany as he was his friend. Austria had a backpack and a green hat on.

And he was carrying something which had been wrapped in a dark cloth.

Austria noticed him and looked a bit taken back from UN's arms.  
"...what happened to you?" He confusedly asked.

UN just stared at him.  
"None of your business." He slighlty slurred.

"Are you drunk?" Austria asked with dead eyes.

"Nah, I'm fine." UN tried to convince but failed.

He continued his path back to bedroom.

As soon as he opened the door he saw EU who was sitting on the bed. As soon as he heard UN stepping he turned hus head at the sound.  
"What took you so long?" He asked.

UN shrugged.  
"I had to clear my head a bit." He tried not to slurr but failed.

EU shook his head.  
"How much did you drink this time?" He asked.

UN only drank strong alcohols if he wanted to numb his negative feelings. UN knew that he shouldn't numb his feelings by drinking or cutting but he didn't know any other as effective ways.

"Not much, only about a desiliter or two of 80% vodka."

" _Only?!_ " EU horrified exclaimed and stood up.

UN was a bit dumbfounded.

"Are you insane?!" EU asked him.

"How so?" He asked.

"That amount can kill you!"

"Nah, I'll be fine. I cannot be killed by alcohol, you should know better." UN shrugged it off.

EU didn't look convinced.  
"You need to get that alcohol out from you."

"No, I'll be fine."

EU was tired and decided not to argue and just took UN by the hand and led him to lie down.

UN couldn't be killed by alcohol or basically anything, the only way he could be killed was if every nation who had formed him and who had joined him and still is a valid member of his union signs an act to end him or he as an union.

EU was basically the same.

UN smiled a bit as he knew how much pain it would cause in the morning to him. He would have a miserable hangover at the morning. But he will still work as usual, no matter what EU says.

He lied right beside EU and looked at him with drunk eyes.

EU didn't like what UN did to himself.  
"You seriously have a problem. I might be a hypocrite but that isn't healthy." He told UN with serious tone.

"Let's not think about it now." UN put his finger on EU's lips to seal them.

"You're right, let's just go to sleep." EU recommended

Austria watched as UN went to his bedroom and closed the door.

He didn't know if he should follow him but decided against it.

He went upstairs and saw Germany and Switzerland arguing.

"What can we do with the way Russia is now?" Germany asked as Russia had passed out and unconsciously vomited on the floor.

They had of course cleaned the vomit and moved Russia to a position where he could breathe as easily as possible.

"I hope his condition doesn't worsen." Swiss sighed and pointed at the drunken Russian.

Then they noticed Austria who looked very tired and that he had traveled far in order to reach Germany's home.  
"Hallo, Österreich." Germany greeted him.

Austria just nodded and slumped on a chair.  
"My father and I fighted again. This time he banished me forever." He sadly told them.

Swiss gasped.  
"What?! Why???" She asked.

Austria shrugged.  
"He apparently hates me." He in an alarmingly casual way told them. He looked a way too relaxed.

Then they noticed that he carried something which was wrapped in a dark cloth. It looked like some kind of weapon maybe a shotgun.  
"What do you have with you?" Germany carefully asked.

"A shotgun." He casually replied. His face had been blanc the whole time and his voice monotone.

He looked suicidal.

"What are you going to do with the gun?" Germany asked with an abvious concern.

Austria formed a tiny smile on his face, he looked scary.  
"I was originally going to kill myself with it... but decided against it as I remembered I still have something to live." His smile faded and he looked broken.

"Okay, fine. I lied." He suddenly announced.

"I tried to shoot myself to the head but I missed it and it hitted my shoulder as you can see." He pointed at his shoulder with his fingers and Germany and Swiss noticed the blood on his shirt, jacket and neck.

"What triggered you trying to commit suicide?" Swiss sadly asked.

"My father kicked me out, remember?" He a bit annoyedly reminded them.

"Yes but what happened excatly?" She asked.

Austria sighed.  
"My father was always disappointed of me, but this time he hated that I failed my Philosophy exam, and I already feel bad about it but he had told me that if I fail any of my exams, he'll kick me out." His eyes dulled.

"Your father is a way too strict and unfair." Germany reassured him.

Austria sighed.  
"I know but it doesn't help much that I am now homeless." His already dulled eyes dulled even more.

Germany and Swiss looked at each other and nodded.  
"I am sure that you can live with us but EU owns this house so we need to ask him in the morning. But right now you can spend the night here." Germany promised.

Austria's eyes brightened a bit but they remained dull.  
"Really?" He asked.

"Ja, do you want to sleep on the couch or do you want a mattress and you sleep on the floor?" Germany asked.

"The couch is fine if I could also get a blanket and pillow." He requested.

"Of course, let me get you them right now." Germany smiled and went to his bedroom and Austria followed him.

Austria stared at the unconscious Russian wide eyed.  
"Why is Russia sleeping at your room?" He asked.

"Err...he drank a bit too much and as you know his father, Soviet. Soviet isn't excactly the nicest person to deal with if you are drunk." Germany a bit anxiously explained to Austria.

Austria nodded but continued to stare at Russia.  
"Why does everyone in this household have bandaged arms?" He pointed at the bandaged forearms.

Germany looked at Austria with disbelief.  
"... _everyone_?" He asked.

"Yeah, no. Not _everyone_ but two people, first UN and now Russia."

"...you saw UN's arms?" Germany asked.

"Yes, completely bandaged arms." Austria commented.

Germany frowned.  
"I knew he cutted himself but that it's this bad...I am now very worried." He sighed and took out one blanket from his closet and then begun to search for a pillow.

"Why does he cut himself? Wait -why would anyone do that to themselves?" Austria asked.

Germany snorted.  
"You are a hypocrite, you have tried to kill yourself multiple times and not to mention the habit of yours to burn your skin with cigarettes." He a bit angrily mentioned.

Austria got anxious.  
"I...I'm trying to get better." He went by a window and opened it.

He took a pack of cigarettes from his jacket pocket and pulled one out to his lips and litted it. He took a long drag of it and held the smoke inside his lungs.

"Austria, show me your arms." Germany commanded.

Austria got even more anxious.  
"Fine, but don't tell anyone. Not even Swiss." He requested.

Germany sighed and nodded.  
"I promise."

Germany went to lock his door room and told Swiss that he and Austria had something to disguss just between them two.

Swiss understood and didn't even try to spy.

Austria held the cigarette on his lips and took his jacket off revealing even more blood as his long sleeved wool shirt was stained with a lot of blood. There was a clear mark of where the bullet had went in.

The bullet was still inside his body but it was clearly visible and one could propably took it out if they were careful.

Austria then rolled up both of his sleeves and his both forearms especially his wrists were covered in bandages.

"Open the bandages." Germany looked at Austria's dull eyes.

Austria looked now even more anxious but nodded.  
"Fine...but don't freak out." He first took a drag of his cigarette and then put it back to his lips before he begun to remove the bandages.

Austria opened his bandages and took them out. Under them were hundreds maybe thousands of burn marks of cigarettes. There were parts of his skin which were completely burnt and his insides of the arms were visible. They looked absolutely disgusting and hideous.

Germany gasped.  
"Oh. My. God...what the hell?!" He exclaimed.

Austria got mad.  
"You promised!" He angrily started to rewrap his arms.

Germany looked horrified.  
"I cannot promise not to get horrified by _that_!" Germany argued.

Austria sighed.  
"I am now two months clean, don't push it." He whined.

Germany's facial expression softened.  
"I am proud of you, but your burns need to get treated."

"I know, I have washed them daily on 90% alcohol mixed with 10% iodine." He said it like it was nothing and took a drag of his cigarette and slowly exhaled the smoke through his nose.

Germany was stunned and horrified.  
"WHAT THE HELL?!" Germany exclaimed.

"...what?" Austria asked.

"You aren't supposed to burn your skin even more!" Germany explained.

"...it does that? No wonder cleaning them has been extremely painful." Austria wondered outloud. He dumped his cigarette from the window as it had nothing left anymore.

"You should only disinfect them with 60% isopropanol if they feel infected or look so, and to cream them with antiseptic cream daily to ensure they don't dry or get infected." Germany instructed.

Austria facepalmed.  
"I am an idiot apparently." He shamefully admitted.

Germany agreed.  
"At least you know it now." He smiled a bit.

Austria's eyes brightened a bit more.  
"Shall we treat my burns then?" He asked.

"Sure, I have my medical cabinet right here." He went by it as it hung on his wall. He opened it and took out a bottle of isopropanol, bandages and antiseptic cream.

He gestured Austria to get rid of his bandages and he compelled.

He then offered his arms to Germany to treat them.

Germany took also a piece of cotton and soaked it with the isopropanol and begun to clean the burns.

Austria didn't even flinch or hiss as the isopropanol went inside his wounds and got in touch with raw skin and arm insides. So Germany got to clean the burns and wounds in peace.

He then started to pour the cream on Austria's skin and gently rubbed it on. Austria didn't react to it either.  
"Those deeper burns need to get new skin and stitches." Germany looked at Austria with worried eyes.

Austria rolled his eyes.  
"Nah, they'll be fine in their own if given enough time, I've healed them before." He said like it was nothing.

"What the hell?!" Germany gasped.

"Just continue what you were doing and shut up." Austria annoyedly commanded.

Germany shutted his mouth as told.

Austria had stared Germany in the eyes for a while. His expression was very calm.

After Germany had bandaged Austria's arms as good as he was able Austria hugged him. Germany responded to the hug and they were like that for a while until Austria pulled Germany into an embrace.

He looked at Germany's green eyes. The soulfullness on them was breathtaking. Austria's own eyes were always very dull but when he was with Germany they brightened up and showed his hazel eyes.

Austria had always knewn that he felt something very special towards Germany but couldn't properly identify it before this moment.

His previous forced relationship with Hungary didn't end well.

He then kissed Germany to the lips as he felt like it was the thing he felt for him. Germany was shocked and his eyes went wide.

But eventually he responded to the kiss. The kiss deepened and they both felt like it was the thing they both have needed for a long time.

Germany and Swiss' relationship on the surface looked very perfect and that they were meant for each other. -but the reality was that they were always arguing and having trouble with their relationship and almost with everything.

Even EU didn't suspect a thing. Everyone was fooled.

Austria moved his lips from Germany's and begun to kiss his neck. Germany begun to slightly shiver and suffocated everh moan he almost made.  
"Öster, we need to halt this for at least now." He panted.

Austria halted his actions and nodded.  
"When are you going to tell Swiss...or should we have threesome?" He asked.

Germany pondered a bit and nodded.  
"Threesome would actually work. I'll talk to Swiss, you go and clean your shoulder up."

Austria nodded and pulled his sleeves back down.  
"Okay, see you in a bit." He exited the bedroom and begun to walk downstairs to the bathroom. But as he saw Swiss who looked at him suspiciously Austria's eyes dulled again right before Swiss' eyes.

Swiss was about to say something but Austria had already disappeared to the downstairs.

Swiss went to Germany's bedroom and saw Germany closing one of his windows. Then she smelled cigarette smoke and saw Austria's leather jacket on one of the chairs nicely seated by the table.  
"What happened between you and Austria?" She asked.

Germany a bit nervously looked at Swiss.  
"...uh, the thing is that I and Austria have something to ask from you..." He got a bit anxious.

Swiss didn't know what was going on.  
"What is it?" She carefully asked.

"Would it be okay for you... if we were to have threesome?" He anxiously asked.

Swiss' chin almost dropped to the ground. She looked shocked.  
"... _what?!_ " She asked.

Germany got even more anxious.  
"Well...I love both of you -And I thought we could all be together?" He tried to explain.

Swiss shook her head.  
"...Germany, how long have you felt like this?" She asked.

Germany sighed.  
"I have felt something towards Austria for years but the fact that I also feel something towards you as well made me to choose one of you...but now I realized why not to be with the both of you." Germany pointed out.

Swiss thought about it for a while until she nodded.  
"Okay...but how are we going to do this?" She asked.

Germany's eyes widened.  
"...so it is okay to you?" He asked.

She nodded.  
"If it's important to you then it's fine. But for real how are we going to do this?" She asked again.

Germany smiled.  
"Well... we could all be together as a one big couple, all sleep together and all have sensitive moments together." He suggested.

"Okay, but I need to get to know Austria better in order to fully agree on this...I don't know if I feel anything for him as I barely know him." Swiss sighed.

"It's okay...but is it okay to you if e.g I kiss Austria in front of you?" Germany asked.

Swiss nodded.  
"Yes, of course. You love also him so it would be unfair if I denied you from doing that." She rationally responded.

Germany smiled.  
"I really appreciate that you are okay with this."

Swiss nodded and looked again on the leather jacket. And noticed again the blood on it.  
"How is his shoulder doing?" She asked.

Germany's smile vanished.  
"The bullet is still inside his flesh and it apparently hadn't stopped bleeding..." He sighed.

Swiss looked worried.  
"We need to put a compression on it after getting the bullet out. Where is he now?" She asked.

"I asked him to clean his shoulder, so I think he is in the bathroom right now." Germany shrugged.

And as Swiss was going to say something Austria entered the room.

His eyes were very dull, his face completely neutral and he was shirtless showing his overweight torso. He only had a towel covering his lower half and bandages on both of his forearms. He was holding a bullet with his left fingers. The bullet was bloody and the way he had apparently taken it out was that he had basically squeezed his fingers inside the wound and ripped the bullet out.

The bullet wound was bleeding with an alarming speed but Austria didn't seem to care.

Germany and Swiss looked at him horrified.  
"Austria, your wound is bleeding!" She exclaimed.

"I know." He flatly answered.

"We need to put a compress on it in order to stop the bleeding, is that okay?" She asked while taking a compress and bandages out from Germany's medical cabinet.

Austria just nodded.  
"I'll sew it up first." He offered and took out a needle and surgical yarn from the medical box.

"Are you sure you can do it?" She concernly asked.

"Yes." He answered and at first he cleaned it up with isopropanol and then begun to sew it up. His expression didn't even change a bit. His face was stony neutral. His eyes dull and lifeless.

It seemed like he felt nothing as he sew his wound up.

Germany and Swiss looked at each other with concern.

After Austria had finished the sewing he looked at them and gestured them to do what they suggested earlier.

Swiss put the compression on Austria's chest and held it on place while Germany wrapped bandages on it and tightened it. After the bandages were put on place Austria put his t-shirt back on.

And as his eyes met Germany's they became less dull and the color came slightly back to them. Then the eyes lightened a way more and they were almost the color they would be if he wasn't feeling depressed or down.

And as Germany hugged him Austria's eyes went completely colorful. Austria felt good that the one he loved hugged him.

Swiss watched how much Austria showed life on his usually dead and dull eyes as he hugged Germany.  
"Austria, I am fine with you two being together and being threesome is okay to me." She told him.

Austria slowly moved his eyes from Germany's to hers.  
"Okay, I would like to know you better too." He a bit flatly told.


	5. Hangover

Russia woke up with a terrible headache, propably the worst ones he had ever had. His head felt like a drill was trying to get either inside his skull or trying to escape his skull. He felt dizzy.

He opened his eyes and saw himself lying on a mattress on someone's floor. He had no memory after he went to the bear with Germany and his crew... ah, Germany. He was in his house.

His memory slowly got more clear and he had remembered being in Germany's or whothefuckever's car. And apparently he had ended in Germany's house and not in his father's.

Ан блин... his father would _definitely_ be mad at him the next time he went home.

But he was glad that his father didn't see him on a drunken state. Soviet hated drunk people as he had previously been an alcoholic but managed to cut down his drinking to the point that he very rarely drank or even thought about drinking.

He would on rare occasions open a bottle of vodka and drink from it in order to relax. But drinking wasn't anymore something he felt obligately needed in order to survive on daily basis.

Russia was proud of his father even though he didn't show it.

Then he looked around the room and noticed a wallclock which showed him the time, 6:55AM. He facepalmed as he knew that he couldn't possibly fall asleep again. And everyone else will propably wake up soon so trying to sleep again was pretty much useless.

Then his eyes spotted Germany's bed and he saw three people sleeping right next to each other.

Russia sat up on the mattress in order to take a closer look on the people sleeping there.

He recognized Germany and Switzerland but the one sleeping in the middle he didn't. He wondered a bit the reason why the three of them were all sleeping together in one single bed.

Maybe they all were in love with each other, or maybe they just had decided to sleep together in order not to have to prepare individual beds for each of them.

Russia stood up, grabbed his ushanka and jacket from the chair and went to the small lobby there was in the uptairs. He looked around to find a toilet and eventually found it.

He opened the door and turned the lights on.

The restroom was pretty small, it only had one toilet, a sink and a mirror and a blue round rug on the floor for some reason.

And a medical cabinet.

He lookedat it and decided that he should propanly change his bandages to the fresh ones, as he had worn same bandages for a day and he had cutted himself yesterday morning. The cuts also needed to be cleaned.

He rolled up his adidas jacket sleeves and took the old bandages off. And as he took them off he hissed in pain as some of the cuts had dried right into the bandages and as he took the bandages off they ripped some of the cuts open.

The deepest ones started to bleed.

He took a bottle of isopropanol and sprayed some on his cuts, the cuts stung but it meant that they got properly cleaned.

He then took a piece of toilet paper and cleaned the cuts and wiped off the excess isopropanol.

As the cuts were properly cleaned he took a roll of bandages and bandaged his arms as well as he could. After he was satisfied with the results he disposed any evidence left from him using someone else's equipment and stuff.

He then pulled his sleeves back down.

He looked at himself from the mirror and saw how the dark undereyes had formed during the last few days.

He hated how they looked and always tried to get rid of them by trying different kinds of creams and lotions to lessen the puffness of the eyebags... but nothing seemed to work on them.

And it didn't help much that he suffered from insomnia time to time. Sleeping wasn't something he took for granted.

He then used the toilet and exited the restroom.

He went downstairs and didn't like it at all that it was completely dark there. He didn't have the courage to turn the lights on as he didn't want to wake up anyone who might still be sleeping.

But then he saw EU drinking coffee in the kitchen and he had the kitchen light on. He was sitting on a chair.

He only had boxers and a t-shirt on. Russia got anxious as he didn't want to disturb EU as they weren't excactly the best friends.

Then his attention went to EU's neck. Russia's face got red. Apparently EU had a rough night or something.

But then EU noticed him.  
"Guten Morgen, Russland." He greeted him.

"Доброе утро, Европейский Союз." Russia a bit embarassely greeted him back.

EU nodded and continued to drink his coffee. He also had his laptop on right in front of him and it was on.

Russia seated himself in the opposite side of the table and looked yet again to EU's laptop.  
"Do you already have vorrk?" He carefully asked.

EU didn't move his eyes from the screen.  
"I always have work, but I don't always have time to work." He smirked.

Russia's mood got a bit better.  
"I nov feel lucky that I don't have that much vorrk to do, the Sovjet's debt is still valid...but I have managed to pay some of it off." He explained.

EU moved his eyes from the screen and looked at the Russian. He looked tired, his eyes were a bit dull.  
"Are you alright? You look tired." He asked with concern.

"I'm fine. I drrank a bit too much yesterrday, that's all." He smiled.

"Would you like a coffee?" He asked.

"Yes, thanks." He agreed and EU rose up from his chair and took a coffee mug from the cabinet and filled it with coffee.

In the meantime Russia looked around the kitchen and saw multiple empty beer bottles on the kitchen counter and on the sink.

Russia had no suspicion to who had drank all those as EU looked like he could be 6 months pregnant if he were a woman.

Russia didn't know what to think about it.

He didn't know what could lead a succesful businessman to alcoholism, or at least to a heavy alcohol consumption.

For Russia it seemed like EU had everything he could ever dream of but something didn't seem right.  
"EU...vhat's vith the alkohol?" He a bit nervously asked.

EU halted what he was doing and his expression freezed. He looked a bit anxious.  
"...I...Uh, I have to somehow reduce my stress levels." He sighed.

"Does drrinking help?" Russia asked.

EU nodded.  
"Yes, I rarely drink strong alcohols as I don't intend to get wasted. I only need to get to a bit drunk to get rid of all stress." He sighed and gave Russia a cup of coffee.

Russia understood it well.  
"Да, I get it... but you do rrealize it makes you gain veight?" He pointed out.

EU folded his arms and nodded.  
"I am very aware of that. I am trying to reduce my alcohol consumption... but I find it hard to do that as I don't have any other methods to lessen my stress levels as effectively." He explained.

Russia slightly nodded.  
"Hov many hours do you vorrk a day?" He asked.

EU sat back down.  
"I usually start my shift at 9:30AM and end it somewhere between 2 to 4PM. But I still continue working as long as I have time sensitive emails left. But at the latest I will absolutely stop answering any emails is after 9PM." And as he explained he also realized how long his days were.

"A vay too long day." Russia pointed out.

"Yes, I noticed that myself too." EU replied and finished his coffee.

"...then vhy are you vorrking nov?" Russia asked.

EU nodded and saved his work before turning his laptop off.  
"You can eat whatever you find, I'll go and dress up." He smiled before disappearing into his and UN's bedroom.

Russia begun to search kitchen cabinets.

He found multiple thungs he could eat but didn't know what they all were. Then he found raw fish from the fridge. He took all meat out of it and disposed the rest (bones, organs, skin, head, fins).

He took it out and started to search for a frying pan, some flour and butter. Eventually he found them all and fried the fish.

Then he took out a bag of potatoes and poured them into boiling water and waited them to soften enough for him to eat.

As he had made the food he saw EU who was impressed with Russia's cooking.   
"Will you make more for all of us, please?" He asked.

Russia nodded.  
"Да, даваи." He agreed.

EU nodded and smiled.

EU was wearing a dark gray turtleneck, black trousers and white socks. He apparently didn't need to visit his office today as he wasn't dressed formally like he usually does.

He then went upstairs, maybe to wake up the students.

As EU arrived on upstairs he noticed how every light was off and turned the lights on. He opened the curtains in order to let the light in.

It was a sunny autumn day, leaves on the threes were orange, yellow, red, brown and green. The sunshine looked warm and as he glanced to the trees there seemed to be no wind.

There were people walking in the park near his house.

He felt glad that the lot he had purchased so many years ago was so large. He had trees, a pond, large grass and flower area, the lot was quite peaceful. The parks near his house were also helping to maintain the peacefulness. He had also planted various types of flowers and trees such as apple, pear, plum, and cherry trees.

Then he entered Germany's room and turned the lights on.

He went by the curtains and opened them. He then turned to face Germany's bed. And to his surprise there was three people sleeping instead of two as he had assumed.

"Guten Morgen." He waked them up.

They all except Austria opened their eyes.  
"Morning, what's the time?" Germany asked.

EU glanced at the wall clock.  
"9:22AM, when does your school start today?" He asked.

Germany's eyes widened.  
"Ah, sheiße! My math class started 22 minutes ago!" He panicked.

EU shook his head.  
"How about going to the next lesson then? How about you, Switzerland?" He asked.

"At 12:15PM, I have plenty of time." She answered and tried to poke Austria to wake up.

Austria mumbled something but kept his eyes shut.

EU eyed him. He knew who it was of course but he was still thinking about the reason why he was there.  
"What's the situation with him?" He sighed.

Germany and Swiss looked at each other a bit before nodding.  
"We are all three together now, so I think he can live with us from time to time?" He a bit unsurely asked.

"You three as a 'couple'?". EU asked.

They all three nodded but Austria for some reason wanted to continue his slumber.

EU first didn't say anything but then sighed.  
"Okay...if you are all happy together, then who I am telling you to stop." He told them.

"So it's okay for us to be together in your house?" Swiss asked.

"Yes." EU nodded.

Austria opened his dull eyes and stretched his arms.  
"I feel good that you all are okay with this." He sleepily told them.

As he put his hands behind his neck his shoulder begun to ache a bit. But he didn't care as the pain wouldn't go away even if he cared.

EU noticed the bandage around Austria's chest.  
"What happened to your chest?" He asked.

Austria's eyes dulled more.  
"I shot myself." He flatly told him.

Swiss and Germany looked at Austria with worried eyes.  
"He tried to kill himself yesterday but luckily he failed to do so." She told EU.

EU was shocked and upset.  
"...is it because of your father again?" He asked.

Austria nodded and his eyes went completely dull. He looked dead.

EU knew about Austria's father as Austria had sent him emails about his situation home and about his father, and EU had tried to help him. EU felt a bit helpless as he couldn't have done much about it.  
"You cannot live with your father." EU told Austria.

"I won't even think about it." He murmured.

"You can live with us if you want to." EU offered.

Austria's eyes became a bit less dull and he nodded.  
"Thank you, it means a lot to me." He thanked.

EU nodded.  
"When does your lessons start?" EU asked him.

"At 11AM." He answered and closed his eyes again.

"Okay, if any of you need a ride then hit me up as I will work from home today." He offered.

The three of them nodded and then Germany smelled that something was being fried.  
"Is that fish?" He asked confusedly.

EU smiled.  
"Yes, Russia is preparing us breakfast." He informed and took his leave. Soon his phone rang and he answered to it.

Germany rubbed his thumb against Austria's neck.  
"You can't sleep any longer." He softly told him.

Austria opened one of his eyes and yawned revealing his yellow teeth.

Swiss shook her head.  
"When was the last time you brushed your teeth?" She asked.

"Maybe two days ago, why?" He asked.

"You're supposed to at least brush them once a day." She commented.

Austria didn't care about her nagging and nuzzled his head against Germany's arm.

Germany gently pushed Austria's head away.  
"I need to dress up." He said as he stood up.

Austria pulled the bedsheets to cover his body fully with them.

Swiss eyed him but didn't say anything as Austria stole her blanket too. She rose up too and begun to dress up as she was only wearing her underclothes.

Germany looked at her and Austria.  
"What should we do after school today?" He asked.

"Shall we go to a coffee shop?" She requested.

"Sounds good to me." Germany smiled.

"...mmh, it's alright to me." Austria sleepily murmured before falling asleep again. He started to snore.

Swiss and Germany smirked at each other.  
"That guy sure knows how to sleep." They joked.

Then they saw Russia who was wearing apron to come in.  
"Еда готова иди и ешь." _(The food is ready, go and eat.)_ He informed them.

They just looked at each other as they couldn't understand Russian.  
"...What?" Germany asked.

Russia facepalmed.  
"Food, you go and eat." He annoyedly told them.

"I am very sorry that I couldn't understand you, but okay we will be right there." Germany apologized and smiled.

Russia rolled his eyes and took his leave.

"He seems to always be in a bad mood." Germany sighed.

Swiss agreed and was going to say something but Austria suddenly spoke up from his slumber.  
"Could you open a window?" He asked.

Swiss nodded and opened a window.

Austria sat up on the bed revealing his overweight body yet again, the fat was mostly on his belly and thighs. Austria usually was very self-conscious about his weight but right now he didn't care about it as he had been almost naked in front of Germany and Switzerland the whole night so they've already seen his body.

He then took out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter from his backpack. He took one out to his lips and litted it. He took a drag of it and closed his eyes.

"How many packs of cigarettes do you have with you?" Germany asked.

"I have enough for a week maybe, although I need to resupply soon." He answered and took another drag.

"I also smoke weed, just to inform you." He took a 2 kilo package of weed from his backpack and showed it to them.

"...okay, but why?" Germany asked.

Swiss just stared at the package wide-eyed.

"Mainly because it feels good." He told them and lied on the bed while still smoking his cigarette.

"Do you...you know use any other types of...?" Germany asked.

"No, not anymore. Maybe three years ago I sometimes would have used cocaine but I quitted as it begun to affect my life a bit too much." He calmly told them.

Swiss and Germany nodded and went downstairs leaving Austria alone.

Austria felt like he could sleep for eternity as his head felt like it was made of cotton. He also needed to eat and drink something.

He still decided to stay in bed for an hour more, maybe.

As Germany and Swiss arrived to the downstairs they smelled an aroma of fried fish, boiled potatoes and coffee.

They saw Russia and UN eating by the table. EU was on the balcony talking with someone on the phone. He looked stressed.

Russia had aten a lot of food apparently as he had still lot on his plate. UN however was mainly drinking coffee and trying to eat potatoes.

"Vhat's vrrong vith the картошка?" _(Potatoes)_ Russia asked as UN struggled to eat the potatoes.

"I am sorry, they're fantastic... but I struggle to eat almost anything right now. I have no grudge towards your cooking." UN politely explained.

"Did you drrink too much yesterrday?" Russia asked.

UN nodded.  
"Yes, 80% vodka is a bit dangerous to drink." He sighed.

Russia laughed.  
"Хахахахахахаха! 80% водка is the best to drrink, you kan neverr knov vherre you'll end up." He smiled widely.

UN smiled a bit.  
"I agree with you on this one, but it's still pain in the ass to sober your head up." UN pointed out.

"Trrue." Russia agreed and his good mood was boosted instantly.

Then they noticed Swiss and Germany who sat next to Russia.  
"Good morning Russia, thank you for cooking to us." Germany smiled at him.

Russia nodded.  
"Let's get along betterr." He smiled at Germany. Russia decided not to hold any old grudges against Germany anymore as it wouldn't do much good to either of them.

As Germany and Russia shook hands and smiled they both knew they'll be friends again just like on the good old times.

UN smiled as the joy of those two countries reflected to him. It had bothered him for a while that Germany and Russia's realtionship had cooled down as they could be much stronger, more peaceful and diplomatic, if they worked together.

For the first time in months UN felt a spark of hope, his eyes brightened a bit and he didn't look as gray anymore.  
"I am very glad that you two get along again." UN genuinely smiled.

Germany and Russia nodded at each other. It was a good thing that UN didn't feel as bad as he usually did, but it also helped Germany to feel better to know that he had Russia as an ally and a friend instead of as a passive-aggressive opponent.

Germany took a plate and some potatoes and fish on it. Swiss looked at the food and decided to taste the food. She didn't excatly eat heavy foods right after she had waken up.

Then EU came back inside and sighed.  
"I propably need to meet Italy today in order to discuss about his loans... Sheiße." He sounded very tired.

Russia didn't like Italy at all, he had had problems with him a way too many times. Italy wasn't someone who was rational and it seemed that he had little to no idea what he actually was doing.  
"Let me talk to him." Russia requested from EU.

EU looked confused.  
"...you? Why?" He asked.

Russia shrugged.  
"If he is a pain in the ass, I kan trry and put some sense to his head." He cracked his knuckles.

UN shook his head.  
"No violence." He told Russia in a low voice.

"Блин... okay, I'll stay out of this." Russia sighed.

EU nodded.  
"Thanks. I really hope Italy will be more co-operative today than the last _few_ times." He sighed and rubbed his temples. A headache was forming as talking to Italy was mentally very painful.

EU sat down and continued to work. UN came closer to him and asked if he could still work today despite EU earlier telling him to have a day off from work.

"No, I won't allow it." EU shook his head.

"Why can you tell me when to work and when to not?" UN a bit annoyedly asked.

EU sighed.  
"Because you are incapable doing that yourself, that's why." EU looked very tired.

UN didn't want to argue as EU looked stressed and tired.

Then Swiss checked the time. It was 10:05AM, Austria needed to be at school by 11AM.  
"I wonder if Austria is still sleeping." She turned to Germany.

Germany shrugged.  
"Probably. We should go and check on him." He recommended.

Russia's interest was gained instantly.  
"Vho again? The one vith a vhite stripe on his red face?" He asked.

"You know Austria?" Germany asked.

"Yes, I had seen him a kouple of times in skhool but never knev vho he vas." He explained.

"Now you know his name." Germany smiled.

Russia smiled and continued to eat.

Germany and Swiss finished their eating and put their dishes away before going to upstairs.

As they arrived in Germany's room they saw Austria who had hard time to fit in his trousers. Eventually he succeeded.  
"Ich hasse diese verdammte Hosen.." _(I fucking hate these trousers)_ He muttered.

Swiss looked at herself and all the extra which was on her thighs, legs, arms, waist and chest. She had succesfully lost 5 kilos last month but she still wasn't satisfied with her body.  
"I feel you, I also sometimes have troubles getting my skirts or trousers on. As you can see I don't have the smallest legs or waist." Swiss sadly smiled at Austria.

Austria rolled his eyes.  
"...I see." He flatly answered and litted a cigarette.

"You do remember that your school starts in about 40 minutes?" Germany asked.

Austria took a drag and nodded.  
"Yes, a philosophy class." He replied with an eyeroll.

"Are you going to walk to the school?" Germany asked him.

"Yes." Austria simply answered and embraced Germany.

Germany watched how Austria's eyes lightened up and all color returned to them.  
"What's with you eyes?" He out of curiosity asked.

Austria's eyes dulled again.  
"My eyes... they reflect how I am feeling inside, the duller the less positive thoughts I have, the brighter the less negative thoughts I have. I sadly cannot force my eyes to reflect anything I don't feel." He explained and his eyes dulled even more. They were gray.

Germany held his hand on Austria's cheek.  
"I remember you telling me about this once before but I wasn't sure." He told him.

Austria took another drag of his cigarette. Germany didn't like the smell of cigarettes and backed away.  
"Please don't smoke near me." He nicely asked.

"Okay, sorry." Austria flatly apologized kept the cigarette on his lips and was on his way out. Germany or Swiss didn't have time to ask him if it was okay to walk with him to the school but Austria was already gone.

Swiss looked at Germany.  
"Are you still sure this thing of ours is going to work?" She asked.

Germany sighed and shook his head.  
"...I don't know. Austria is just so hard to be with, although I love him. He is so negative all the time, smokes too much, and is a bit rude." He listed.

Swiss nodded.  
"I absolutely agree with you. We need to have him behave better or kick him out. I don't tolerate his behaviour even a bit." She told him.

Germany looked serious.  
"But if we kick him out, he'll get even more depressed..."

"We need to get him talk to a psychologist." Swiss recommended.

Germany shook his bead.  
"I agree, but I think it's not an easy thing to accomplish."

Swiss nodded.  
"But we have to get him help, it's essential."

"Yeah, but right now we cannot do much." Germany rationally pointed out.

Swiss agreed.  
"Yep, we should take our backpacks and ask Russia if he has any lessons today." She recommended.

Germany nodded and took his backpack from the floor and checked if he had every needed book with it. He had everything he needed but packed some more notebooks with him just in case as he knew his History teacher would always make students write very much notes.

Swiss took her own backpack with her and as they went downstairs they heard some Russian swearing from the kitchen.

"Ах, трахаться!" Russia sweared.

"What happened?" Germany asked.

Russia looked angrily at the remains of the fish which were on the floor. He had tried to throw them out but failed as the remains found their way out of the bag Russia had stuffed them into.  
"That fucking bag betrrayed me!" He whined.

Germany glared at the fish bones, organs and skin on the floor.  
"That's unfortunate, do you need any help?" He asked.

Russia shook his head.  
"No, I kan do this on my ovn." He begun to put all of the remains into a new not-broken bag.

"Hey, Russia... when does your lessons start?" Germany asked.

"At 12:15PM, vhy?" He asked.

"Swiss' lessons also start at 12:15PM and mine too." Germany smiled.

"Ok, and you vant me to kome vith you to skool?" He untrustfully asked.

"Yeah, why not?" Swiss grinned.

Russia sighed.  
"Fine, but don't get angrry vith me if I go vith Amerrika instead of you as ve arrive in skool." He smiled.

"Deal." Both Swiss and Germany agreed.

"... I also need to get my backpack frrom home." Russia sadly sighed.

"Ah, sheiße. I really hope that Soviet is in a good mood." Germany worriedly pointed out.

"Да, I don't vant to get beaten today." Russia admitted.

They decided to walk since they needed to get Russia's backpack from his home. They all put their shoes on and exited the house.

EU continued to answer calls and UN just watched him do that. Watching someone who had mastered all european languages talk to different countries on the phone was interesting.

EU had ordered UN to eat as much as he can and was continuously asking if UN could eat more. UN felt a bit sick as he had eaten on last two days a way more than he had aten in weeks. But he tried his best not to whine about it as it wouldn't really help.

EU had also ordered UN to sleep at least 8 to 10 hours a day. It didn't matter if he slept it all in one go or in naps. But it was important to EU that UN's health improves. UN didn't really mind that his health wasn't the best but as it caused him so many problems and difficulties he decided that it was just easier for him to imrove it at least a bit.


	6. A Weird Day

As Germany, Swiss and Russia were walking to Soviet's house they sensed that Russia was afraid.

He slightly shook but tried not to show it.

"Are you okay?" Germany asked.

Russia straightened his posture.

"Yes, only nerrvous." He admitted.

As they arrived to the lot they saw Soviet chopping down the firewood with an ax. But as soon as he noticed the teens he put his ax away, turned to look at them and folded his arms.

"Vhere have you been?" He asked from Russia.

"I had a sleepoverr vith Gerrmany, I'm only getting my backpack so I kan learrn today." He anxiously explained.

Soviet huffed.

"Good, I kould have put a bet with Ukrraine that you've been drrinking." He smirked and continued chopping the firewood.

Russia quickly went inside and took his bag and exited the house as soon as he could.

As Switzerland and Germany were quietly observing the situation they got bad vibes from Soviet who aggressively demolished huge pine tree trunks into pieces with ease. They didn't want to have trouble with a guy like that. Soviet could easily kill each and everyone of them.

So they just grinned to each other while waiting for Russia to come out.

After 2 minutes they saw Russia come out with his backpack and eating a whole roasted potato and putting some more potatoes wrapped in foil to his hoodie pockets. He for sure was a hungry boy.

"Let's go." He ordered.

Germany and Swiss nodded and they all took their leave before Soviet changes his mind about being friendly.

* * *

As they arrived to the school yard they saw that there were many countries there.

They noticed Austria who was apparently smoking weed with Netherlands and Jamaica. Jamaica was happily chatting with Netherlands but Austria just looked to the ground with gray eyes and stayed silent. Austria always looked like he could end his life at any moment, he was emotionless, cold and didn't even feel pain anymore. He could damage himself as much as he wanted without pain preventing him from doing that.

Then they noticed America coming towards them smiling. He had a gray NATO-hoodie on, blue jeans and a red backpack.

"Heya!" He greeted.

Russia's earlier gloomy mood vanished and he slightly smiled while eating a potato.

"Добрый день Америка." (Good day, America) Russia greeted him.

America knew a little bit Russian so he could guess that he greeted him back.

He looked at the Russian and saw that his pockets were full of potatoes.

"I see that you've brought your own snacks with you." He smiled widely.

Russia halted his chewing for a moment before continuing. He took one potato from his pockets and handed it over to America.

"You go and eat." He told the American who gratefully took the meal and begun to inspect it more closely.

"Thanks man." He smiled to the Russian who rolled his eyes.

Germany and Swiss who have been silently observing them decided that it was time to leave those two with each other. They waved at the two and took their leave.

* * *

As Germany and Swiss were walking through the school hallways they saw Japan chasing South-Korea and giggling. As she was running such an impressive speed she eventually knocked to Germany and they both fell over.

Germany's glasses fell and Japan was now lying right in top of him.

"Sorry! I was careless!" Japan apologized and helped Germany up from the ground.

"I'm glad that I cannot see anything as you probably would look completely red." Germany grinned and rubbed his eyes.

Japan went bright red as she noticed what she had done.

Swiss begun to laugh.

Germany smiled but had trouble finding his glasses. The only thing he saw was blur, blur everywhere.

"I can't see shit right now." He mumbled.

Japan found his glasses eventually and handed them for Germany with both hands.

"I am sorry for my mistake, Germany-kun." She held her eyes closed during her apology to show respect.

Germany put his glasses back on and was relieved that he could see again.

"It's okay, don't worry about it. But if you mind me asking: What the fuck was that running all about." He grinned.

Japan went red again.

"South-Korea stole my backpack, I only tried to get it back." She grinned widely.

Then South-Korea appeared with Japan's backpack and looked guilty.

"I am sorry too." He apologized before turning to Japan.

"ここに、あなたのバックパック。" (Here, your backpack) He told Japan and they hugged each other as a sign of forgiveness.

Germany looked at Swiss.

"What's with this day?" He tiredly asked and Swiss just shrugged.

"I have no idea, let's just go to the lesson and forget about this all." She reguested.

Germany nodded.

* * *

As the teens had left the house UN felt like he was still a bit happy about the reparation of Russia and Germany's relationship. Those two countries working together would be amazing, and effective.

Those two had hold grudges ever since USSR shifted the power to Russia. USSR and Germany's hatred toward each other was something Russia had learned and continued. Even though the Cold War had ended it didn't lessen the tension between those countries that easily.

But as soon as they both realized what they had been doing, they decided not to continue unnecessary grudges.

UN had had to work with the issues of Russia and Germany a way too much times before, he didn't want to do that again if there was a way to prevent it.

He had lost such an amount of sleep solving those problems that he would not be able to pay that sleep debt off.

His thoughts were interrupted by EU who looked uncomfortable.

"I have to visit Italy, I'll be back in an hour or so."

UN nodded.

"Alright." He simply replied.

As EU had packed all his stuff and was about to leave he patted UN to the shoulder as a sign of worry.

"Yes yes, I will eat in the meantime." UN mumbled.

EU smiled and took his leave.

As soon as EU was out of sight UN sighed. He felt relieved to be alone for a moment, he hated to be babysat.

He was just sitting on a chair for good 20 minutes doing nothing but breathe and think, he had many issues to be solved but as he couldn't work on them he would at least think about them and try to solve them on his head.

But as he could not work on any of them he begun to feel useless, numb, a waste of time.

He tried to calm down.

His anxiety levels begun to rise. His arms tingled and cuts begun to burn and ache.

He knew that if he cut himself EU would notice and he would not leave UN from his sight for a while. But if he didn't cut right now he didn't know how long he would be able to tolerate the feeling.

He stood up from the chair and escaped in the bathroom, a knife on his trembling hand.

* * *

America and Russia had an art class together.

Russia had painted a black and white, mostly gray painting about a died dog.

America had painted a colorful valley which screamed joy. He turned to look at what Russia had made and his joyful mood vanished instantly.

"...Why is it that your art is always so sad?" He asked.

Russia shrugged and turned to look at what America had made.

"Yourrs is a vay too brright, I'm going to be blind." Russia passive-aggressively complimented. At first America was offended but as soon as he realized it was a compliment he smiled brightly.

"Thanks, I like it too." He self-confidently told to the gloomy Russian.

Russia just rolled his eyes.

"I am surre that the teacherr feels verry delightful seeing your arrt." He tried to sound positive.

After class they went outside to get some fresh air. They sat under a great oak tree which leaves were bright orange and yellow.

Russia closed his eyes and stayed silent. Suddenly he felt America touching his hand and his eyes snapped open.

"...что?" He asked confused.

America bit his lip and looked at the Russian.

"Maybe it is time I confess something to you." He smiled shyly.

Russia looked terrified.

As he was expecting America to tell him something he suddenly felt America's lips on his own. He was taken back by the sudden act and didn't know what to think. He had three options, do nothing, respond to it and to reject it.

But instead of choosing any of those three, he panicked.

He pulled away, tears formed to his eyes and he shot America a sad glance, and took his leave as soon as he could without a word.

He ran away, he was a coward, he had always ran away from his feelings. 

He had to think, and to be alone.

He locked himself in one of the restroom stalls. He was shaking and he felt like he could not breathe. He opened his backpack and took a pocket knife. 

He then pulled his adidas-jacket sleeves up and opened the bandages under it.

"Блядь. Я уже порезался вчера, ненавижу делать это снова сегодня." (Damn. I cut myself yesterday, I hate doing it again today.) He whispered to himself.

He looked at the previous cuts and felt miserable. Looking at them made him hate himself even more.

He hated that he could not be a man and face his feelings, he probably had destroyed this relationship too by running away from it. He didn't care if he misses the history lesson, he couldn't focus on the topic anyway with this terrible mindset. As he had finished the cutting, he begun to sob.

There was blood dripping from his arms and eventually formed a puddle right in front of him.

As he looked at the amount of blood he had lost he felt sick and dizzy. 

He took a roll of bandages from his backpack and wrapped his arms as well as he could in order to stop the bleeding and to be able to move his hands without the cuts causing him too much pain.

He then cleaned the blood from the floor and exited the restroom only to see a bunch of other countries there.

And ...Austria?

* * *

Austria was walking down the school hallway deep in thoughts, he had been thinking about his and Swiss' relationship and how easily he could ruin everything and cause tension between Germany and Swiss. He would not feel bad about hurting Swiss' feelings but if Germany got hurt he would maybe feel bad about it.

Maybe. He loved Germany after all. It was the only feeling he had felt in years.

He hadn't felt much for the last few years and he didn't even know if he could feel again at some point of his life.

He was so deep in thoughts that he didn't realize China talking to Taiwan and holding a sharp pencil on his fingers pointing towards left. He accidentally bumped into China and the pencil stabbed and went right into his left eye.

China and Taiwan looked horrified and some other countries begun to scream.

"Austria! Your eye!" China yelled.

Austria came back to reality from his thoughts and noticed that some blood was dripping from his eye and to the floor. He put his fingers to identify the object causing the bleeding. It was a pencil. 

He casually and a bit too calmly just pulled it out and noticed the left eye had went blind. All he could see was black.

"Oh.. sorry about the pencil, it's ruined now." Austria apologized and put his hand to the eye to cover it up as it looked very brutal.

China and the other countries were looking at Austria with stunned and horrified expression.

"Austria, what the hell?!" Mongolia yelled in panic.

"Why is he showing no emotion at all?" Taiwan wondered in concern out loud.

"Yeah, that must've hurt so much. Damn." New Zealand pointed out.

Austria formed a 'what the fuck' reaction on his face. he didn't get it why everyone was so worried about him.

"No, I didn't feel anything." He flatly told everyone and continued his walking. He needed to clean the eye and put an eye patch to it.

"Austria, wait!" China yelled at him.

Austria stopped.

"Yes, I am waiting. What?" He asked.

China looked devastated.

"I want to help to clean your eye, it looks really bad." He begged.

Japan joined China and nodded.

"Let us help, Austria-kun." She softly asked.

Austria knew that it would be easier to just let those other countries help him. He didn't want to argue.

"Fine." He finally agreed.

China, Japan, Taiwan, New Zealand, Mongolia and Vietnam went to help Austria.

Austria didn't like to be with countries he didn't have anything common between. He didn't want to bother anyone else, he just wanted to be left alone and deal with his problems himself.

China and Japan gently cleaned his eye and noticed it had turned to an obsidian black lifeless eye. It looked dead but at the same time it was alive but useless.

Mongolia and Vietnam prepared an eye patch for him, it had his flag colors in it. It was very well fitting and looked nice. New Zealand had brought Austria a kiwi fruit sandwich. 

Austria eyed the sandwich suspiciously but as he didn't want to be rude he ate it nevertheless.

Russia silently observed the situation from the distance and tried to stay as quiet as he could in order not to gain any attention to himself as he probably looked like he had just cried as he had.

The other countries tried to lift his mood but as Austria practically felt nothing at all times it was no use. He appreciated that they were trying.

It had became common knowledge that Austria's eyes were special as Germany had posted a pic where he and Austria were and Austria's eyes were green. All everyone else saw was gray eyes when ever they saw him.

They watched as Austria's eye color didn't change at all. It stayed gray even though he received an affectional hug from Japan.

"I am sorry that I could not be cheered up." He flatly apologized.

Japan understood but still felt sad about it.

"Is there anything I could do to make a difference?" She asked.

Austria knew that the only country who could raise his mood was Germany. But he knew that he had a lesson and he shouldn't be disturbed.

"There is one country but he has a lesson right now." Austria lifted his eye from the ground to China.

China was silent for a while until he simply nodded and exited the restroom. He had a specific country to find.

He knew that Germany probably wouldn't mind at all if his lesson were to be partly skipped due this emergency.

As China had left the restroom Japan noticed the quiet Russian who had apparently been watching them.

"Russia-kun!" Japan excitedly greeted him.

Russia felt like as a bit of electricity had went right through him. He just shyly waved to them. He didn't say anything, he just looked devastated.

The other countries turned to look at the sad Russian.

As soon as Russia sensed that questions would be coming he tried to escape from the bathroom only to be stopped by Taiwan who grabbed him from the wrist to stop him.

Russia felt an extreme pain from the grab as the cuts were being twisted. He tried to suffocate a scream which threatened to escape but partly failed to do so.

Taiwan noticed the pain he had caused to the poor Russian and Russia immediately pulled his wrist away and held it protectively. He looked afraid.

"Are you okay?" Taiwan asked with concern.

Russia shook his head.

"No, Amerrika he... he kissed me. I feel sad." He anxiously confessed.

Taiwan, New Zealand and Japan begun to cheer.

"Finally, he did it!" Japan excitedly announced.

"Yeah, he had a crush on you for the past 2 years at the least." New Zealand informed with a smirk.

Taiwan was just happily cheering with Japan.

Russia's eyes widened.

"Ах дерьмо..." He mumbled.

He had to make things right. He thought about exiting the restroom and trying to find America. He knew that he had a history class going on so he had to wait for it to end in order to make up for his mistake.

So he stayed with them and looked at Austria who had a brand new eye patch.

"Vhat happened to you?" He asked.

Austria lifted his eye from the ground to look at Russia.

"I got stabbed to the eye by China by accident." He flatly told him.

"By vhat?" He asked.

"A sharp pencil." He formed a tiny smirk.

Russia looked at the unusual facial expression on Austria with an awe.

"You should do that more often, looks good on you." Russia Smiled.

Austria's smirk vanished and he nodded.

* * *

Germany was taking notes as the history teacher just kept talking and talking without writing anything down to the black board. That teacher was commonly disliked by this reason. And by the fact that their lessons were so long.

Swiss was reading the history book as she knew Germany would take the notes. They shifted the turns who would take notes from each and every lesson, today it was Germany's time. His focus was interrupted by a text message (his phone of course was on a silent mode but he saw how the screen lit up.

It was from China and it read:

"There is an emergency and you need to come out from that boring history lesson right now!"

Germany looked at the message puzzled and whispered to Swiss that he needed to go and that she would have to take the rest of the notes herself.

Swiss nodded and took Germany's notebook and continued taking notes.

As Germany exited the classroom he was greeted by a worried China.

"Something terrible happened and it's all my fault." China panicked and begun to lead Germany to the restroom.

"Slow down, what happened and to who?" Germany asked.

China didn't slow down, he continued to lead Germany.

China opened the restroom door and they were greeted by many countries. Germany looked around till he spotted Austria who had an eye patch on.

"What happened to your eye?" Germany worriedly asked.

Austria looked at Germany and was about to say something but was interrupted by China.

"I accidentally stabbed him to the eye while I was holding a pencil on my hand standing in the hallway. Austria walked to me and I had no time to put that pencil away." China put hands on his eyes and begun to sob.

Germany looked at the sobbing China and them back to Austria who was silent.

"Yes, now the eye is blind. I am not angry with China, it was an accident." Austria looked at China who was still sobbing.

"Are you alright?" Germany asked from Austria and put his hand on Austria's cheek to gently lift his chin in order for him to keep his eye on Germany's.

Austria didn't answer he just stared at Germany's eyes and his own eye brightened, it was more green than gray now.

"I am now that you are here." He finally answered.

Germany smiled and hugged Austria who hugged back.

Japan and the others were just staring at them and noticing Austria's green eye.

"Green looks good on you!" Japan commented.

Austria moved his eye from Germany to Japan and as he looked at her his eye went slowly from green to gray.

Germany then politely asked everyone else to leave the restroom so he and Austria could be together in peace.

As they were leaving China and Taiwan winked their eyes at them and New Zealand smirked, others behaved.

As they were finally together in peace Germany kissed Austria passionately. Austria responded to the kiss and begun to undress Germany, he took the shirt off. While Germany let Austria do that he continued kissing but had moved to the neck. Austria has a horrible stamina because he never exercises and smokes too much so he begun to pant. He felt like he needed a moment to gather his breath before he could continue and it didn't help much that Germany was now kissing his collarbone. Then Germany begun to bite Austria's neck.

There would definitely be marks appearing soon.

Austria begun to moan a bit as the sensation grew bigger.

"I...I fucking love you Germany." He whispered.

Germany smiled and moved back kissing Austria's lips.

Austria's eye screamed joyfulness and life. It was so green that one could mistake it with an emerald.

"Germany, I feel something! I fucking feel something!" Austria joyfully realized.

Germany stopped and was now focusing on Austria's facial expression.

"What is it, what do you feel?" Germany curiously asked.

Austria didn't really recognize the feeling he was feeling.

"I don't know but it feels good." He smiled for the first time in ten years.

Germany couldn't believe his eyes.

"Wow, your smile is beautiful." He softly pointed out.

Austria took his turtleneck of revealing the still healing bullet wound under the slightly bloody bandages. And his soft body. Germany begun to inspect more closely with his fingers.

"I never thought your waist to be that soft, it's even more soft than Swiss'." He pointed out.

Austria watched as Germany first nicely inspected his torso but after a while was gently squeezing his fat.

"I don't know about you but that does feel quite nice." Austria admitted.

Germany smirked.

"I am glad that I could make you feel something, it's been hard to watch you suffer." Germany admitted.

Austria was confused.

"Was I suffering, I didn't notice.." Austria's eyes went instantly gray.

Germany frowned.

"It's hard for me to notice other countries' feelings because I mainly feel numb all the time." Austria continued, and put his turtleneck back on.

Germany nodded.

"I can understand that. Maybe we should continue this when we get home. Someone could enter here at any time." He grinned.

Austria rolled his eye.

"Why didn't we think about it before starting this." He smirked.

Germany embraced Austria and continued to kiss him. He didn't care if anyone would see them.

Austria grabbed Germany from the waist in order to bring him closer. He observed Germany's body, he was very average, thin and nothing unusual. Slight abs.

Austria paused the kiss and looked at Germany.

"You should put your shirt back on." He requested.

"Don't you like what you see?" Germany joked.

"Yes but we should go."

Germany nodded.

* * *

UN was breathing very fast, he felt like walls were slowly closing up around him.

He took his turtleneck off and tossed it aside. He opened his bandages and hissed in pain as the previous cuts had dried on to the bandages and were now slowly ripping open.

He made the first ten cuts on wrists and slowly moved up, and more up until his both arms were completely full of new fresh cuts to the shoulders.

After cutting his arms full he still didn't feel finished yet.

He was thinking about cutting on his neck and thighs, he had stayed on his arms for years but now he felt like he could cut on somewhere else now.

He cut on his neck and the sensation it gave him made him feel very good. He only made seven cuts and already he felt like he was on drugs. So he stopped and was just sitting on the tile floor aimlessly staring the ceiling.

He didn't sense time at all and had no idea how long he had been there.

As the sensation eventually wore out a bit he came back to reality and was now feeling screaming pain on his arms and neck. He needed to clean those cuts and put new bandages on before EU would get back.

But as he was almost finished bandaging himself up the bathroom door opened. He had forgotten to lock it!

"Oh my god.." EU gasped. 

"I can explain!" UN panicked.


	7. Kisses and Disasters

EU and UN were just staring at each other in silence. UN looked terrified and scared; he was about to have another panic attack. He looked at EU with feral, afraid eyes. Arms and neck bleeding slowly and his bandages staining in silence.

EU looked sad and defeated.

“Are you okay?” He asked.

UN looked to the floor shaking his head.

“No, I am not okay.” He whispered and closed his eyes in shame.

EU kneeled right in front of UN and hugged him.

UN begun to sob and whimper.

“Help me.” He begged.

EU gently petted UN and rubbed his back.

“I will. Don’t worry.” EU promised.

UN felt relieved.

“Thank you.”

* * *

EU was lazily sitting on the couch, UN laying peacefully in his lap hugging EU’s abdomen.

As UN was eventually asleep EU had a chance to think things through. Maybe a beer or two would help. He carefully lifted UN’s hands from his belly and placed them on the edge of the couch and placed a pillow under UN’s head. He stood up from the couch and stretched his arms.

He had had a long day with Italy and did not wish to meet him again for a while. They hadn’t done much as Italy did not agree on most of the terms EU had set on him about the loan.

And then Italy got angry as he didn’t get what he wanted, and EU did his best to reason with him and to make a solution which could provide both of them better than just arguing and getting nothing done.

He didn’t want to think about it any longer than it was absolutely necessary.

He took two beers from the fridge and placed them on the kitchen table while he went to get the bottle opener. As he had opened the first bottle and drank a half of it the situation with UN came back to his mind.

He didn’t really know what to do with him anymore. His cutting has gotten so out of hand it was endangering his life. UN was obviously anxious about not being able to work with the current tasks he still has unsolved. But EU could not let him work unauthorized as he would likely work himself to the ground again with no doubt.

UN would have to be strictly monitored in order to ensure his own safety. EU did not have the time to do it all the time, someone else would have to do it. And all knives will be strictly prohibited, and EU would have to search for any knives everywhere UN would spend time. Even his pockets will be searched.

EU felt stressed. The state UN was currently was affecting him very much, every time he leaves UN alone, he has that constant fear of UN hurting himself in the meantime he is away.

UN should not be away from his own work either for too long, he really has important duties.

EU felt like has slowly breaking inside, he felt like something was pulling inside of him so aggressively that it would sooner or later snap in half.

Even the beer did not help much, the feeling was too strong.

EU didn’t want to break apart, his countries needed him, and UN.

UN needed medication and counseling. He had to talk to a therapist or a psychologist. His current behavior needs to stop until it’s too late.

EU knew that he had a huge responsibility hanging on his shoulders to get UN better.

He sighed and opened another beer.

Sometimes he wished that all their problems would just vanish, life would be so much easier without them. He would usually drink his problems away but right now it felt they got even bigger.

EU felt really miserable. He dialed Germany and waited for a while until finally Germany picked up his phone.

“Hey, what’s up?” Germany asked.

“Would you please get me more beer on your way home?” EU nicely asked.

Germany was silent for a while.

“...What happened?” He asked with concern.

“UN happened; I will tell you more in person.” EU sighed.

“Oh no... Sure, I will bring you beer. How much do you want it, and do you want anything else?” Germany asked.

“Would you make some food when you get home?” He asked.

Germany laughed.

“Sure! I will be home in twenty. By the way, Austria is also coming.”

“Okay, see you.” And with that EU ended the call.

EU rubbed his temples; a headache was forming.

* * *

Austria and Germany were walking through the school hallway holding hands. Germany looked happy, Austria had his usual 'stone-face' on, but his eye was a bit greener than gray.

Countries who looked at them looked happy to see them happy.

Austria was smiling under his stone-face mask; it was the best feeling to secretly have a facial expression as no-one would see it. Germany was so beautiful and kind he could not stop smiling.

Germany had helped him to see the world in full colors again. Everything had been gray for him for years until the colors came back. He felt alive again but only when he was with Germany.

As they exited the school, they saw Swiss who happily waved at them.

Germany smiled and waved back, Austria did nothing, he was just staring blankly at her.

Swiss embraced Germany and nose-kissed him and then moved to Austria who looked dead as usual. she wondered if he would feel better if she nose-kissed him too. So, she did.

Austria did not know what to think. Swiss’ nose felt nice. As he and Swiss looked at each other right to the soul, they slowly felt attraction towards each other. Swiss blushed and Austria formed a tiny, teeny genuine smile and his eye went green again.

She embraced Austria and kissed him, Austria responded to the kiss and closed his eye.

Germany was observing them and felt great, he was happy to know that they all three could love each other. It seemed to him that their threesome would actually work despite Swiss’ earlier doubts on it.

Then Russia greeted them, looking very gloom.

“What happened?” Germany asked him.

Russia sighed.

“I kannot find Amerika anyvhere. I think I ruined everything by running avay from him.” He fought back as tears were trying to find their way to exit his eyes.

Germany frowned.

“I am sure everything will be okay, given time.” He reassured the sad Russian.

Russia shrugged and kicked the rock right next to his right foot.

The rock hit America’s left foot and Russia was shocked.

“…you.” He awkwardly commented.

America looked sad.

“Why did you run away?” He carefully asked.

Russia bit his lip and blushed heavily. He closed his eyes and sighed.

“Bekause I love you. I just vas overvhelmed by the sudden akt.” He confessed and covered his eyes to hide the tears.

America smiled and moved closer to the Russian in order to hug him. Russia was still covering his eyes but accepted the hug and leaned against the shorter country.

America rubbed Russia’s back softly and felt happy.

“I thought you did not like me.”

Russia’s sobs were interrupted.

“No no no, I vould never not like you.” Russia defended.

America changed the hug to an embrace and looked Russia to the eyes, his light blue eyes.

He then softly held Russia from his wrists only to see Russia slightly flinching.

“Oh, I’m sorry! Didn’t mean to hurt you.” America apologized.

Russia looked uncomfortable and averted his wrists from America’s hands and hid them in his adidas-jacket pockets. He felt ashamed that he had cut again.

America sensed Russia’s shame and gently squeezed Russia’s shoulder to show care. Russia slightly nodded and shyly looked at America’s eyes.

Germany felt better to see those two countries make up their misunderstandment.

He then looked back at Swiss and Austria who were now making out and seemed happy. Austria’s eye was golden-green right now. The color Germany had not seen before. He wondered if it meant that Austria felt elated.

* * *

EU had drunk seven beers and still felt extremely stressed, he wasn’t even drunk at all.

UN was lying on the couch sleeping, he was comfortable and unknowing about the current worry he had caused to his lover. He did not even fit the couch properly, his legs were not hanging from the end but touching the floor very much so, they were just so long legs.

So very long legs. Uncomfortably long legs. He did not choose to be this tall if it were for him to choose from; he would rather be 50 cm shorter than as tall as he is now.

EU had helped UN to bandage himself up properly and now he had bandages around his neck too. He had a light orange t-shirt on, the cuts would have to be visible for EU the all times just in case UN planned to add more.

They had agreed on that EU would watch out for UN and trying his best preventing UN from cutting himself.

He stretched his body and woke up.

He looked around to saw EU looking miserable and all those empty beer bottles around him. UN felt guilty. He felt awful that he had yet again caused his beloved EU this much stress and worry.

He stood up from the couch and went to sit right beside EU and hugged him. EU let UN hug him but hardly showed any interest hugging him back.

UN slightly frowned and felt ashamed.

“EU, I am sorry.” He apologized.

EU turned to look at UN, he looked very worried.

“You need to talk to a therapist, this cannot continue. I won’t allow it to.” EU a bit sternly but with care told UN.

UN sadly nodded.

“I know. I haven’t been this low in a while. I need help.” UN accepted his need of help.

EU felt a bit better. Now he knew that UN was not against getting nor receiving help.

“But… There is something you probably should know…” UN anxiously confessed.

EU was curious but concerned at the same time.

“Tell ahead.” He reassured UN.

“I… I am addicted to cutting myself.”

EU shook his head.

“I suspected that, but I wasn’t entirely sure until now that you’ve been confessing it to me.” EU sighed.

UN felt better knowing that EU wasn’t upset about it.

“I really cannot say much about dealing with an addiction as I am suffering from one myself. I would be a hypocrite telling you to ‘just get over it’ as it doesn’t work that way.” EU logically explained.

UN nodded.

“I still do think that your alcoholism is way healthier than my cutting. I could literally slip my knife and end up in E.R one day.”

EU smirked.

“I would not call it alcoholism but yes, I get the point.”

UN rolled his eyes and smiled.

“Sure, sure. Just drinking every single day but not being an alcoholic.” He grinned.

EU smiled and embraced UN.

“Your halo is brighter than earlier today. Looks good.” He complimented while softly rubbing UN’s cheek with his thumb.

UN blushed. He smiled brightly and his halo grew ever brighter, and the feather/leaf crown straightened its posture and looked nice again. Earlier it had looked messy and worn.

EU was just looking at UN wide-eyed. He looked so beautiful.

UN noticed EU admiring him and looked at his dark, mystic eyes. The golden rings were very much the only light source in his dark, black eyes. Two golden rings observing his each and every tiniest motion.

UN put his hands around EU’s abdomen and enjoyed the softness it gave for his hands. He kept his eyes on EU’s and observed how his cheeks were slowly turning red as UN was now squeezing EU’s sides and sliding his fingers between EU’s fat rolls.

“If you want to, we could continue this on the couch…” EU smirked and continued to blush.

UN nodded and took EU’s hand and lead him to the couch. He gestured him to lay down and EU obeyed. Soon UN was lying right in top of EU and was kissing his neck.

EU put his hands to UN’s waist but mentally screamed when the first thing he felt was UN’s rib cage, so vivid and practically sticking out under his skin.

UN noticed that EU was suddenly uncomfortable.

“What’s wrong?” He asked.

EU bit his lip.

“Your rib cage, and you… you are just so thin, it scares me.” EU carefully told UN not to hurt his feelings.

UN sighed.

“I am trying to get more weight, but it is just so hard, I can’t just eat a bunch of food and get more weight instantly. I am not you who can increase the weight by just eating and drinking too much. As I am severely underweight and malnourished it takes time and great efforts.” UN explained.

EU nodded.

“I know that you’re trying your best, but it still sometimes scares me to realize how thin you are.”

UN nodded and rubbed EU’s neck with his thumb.

“Are you up to continue?” He asked.

EU slightly nodded and closed his eyes to feel better the sensation UN was giving him.

UN was now kissing and biting his neck and EU was slightly shivering as it felt just so good. EU felt his neck bruising slowly.

UN moved from the neck to collarbone and was leaving marks where-ever he went. He gently grabbed the collar of EU’s turtleneck and was silently asking for permission to continue his journey under it.

EU gave him permission and UN undressed EU’s turtleneck and t-shirt and tossed them aside.

UN was looking at EU’s bare abdomen in excitement. EU was smirking as he took a glance of UN’s facial expression.

“You seem excited.” He pointed out.

UN blushed pink and flashed a sweet smile.

And then they heard the main door opening and people chattering.

EU and UN’s eyes went wide, and EU hurriedly dressed up just in time before Germany, Swiss and Austria entering the living room-kitchen-area.

They both were blushing a bit but tried not to show it even though it was obvious the three had disturbed something.

Germany winked an eye at EU whose face was now a straight line and blushing heavily. UN looked happy and was smiling and had the sweet smile still on and his cheeks pink.

Germany pointed at his own neck and mouthed 'bruises' and EU realized that his own neck must be terribly full of hickeys and bruises so pulled his collar more up to hide at least some of them.

Swiss was giggling and Austria looked a bit amused as he had a very small smile on his face.

Austria opened the balcony door and went for a smoke ad UN joined him very soon after. 

Germany, Swiss and EU were just there silent and staring at each other, two of them smiling, one... not so much.

* * *

Austria and UN were both sitting on balcony chairs, smoking in silence.

Austria was secretly eyeing the bandages around UN’s arms and neck. He did not really want to ask about them as he knew how difficult it might be for one to talk.

UN was watching how Austria slightly scratched his wrists as the still healing burns were not behaving. They stung and itched. Austria was trying as hard as he could to ignore the feeling, but it slowly still crept into his thoughts as the main priority.

“Are you okay?” UN asked finally.

Austria closed his eye and shook his head.

“I used to burn myself, and now that I’m not anymore it feels like I cannot ignore the urge to burn myself even though I don’t want to.” He shamefully admitted to UN who listened.

UN sadly smiled.

“I am cutting myself on almost daily basis although I am now trying to stop it.” He confessed.

Austria nodded.

“I noticed. Your neck… are they new?” He finally asked.

UN’s expression went a bit dull and he nodded.

“Yes, I tried it for the first time, and it felt horrifyingly amazing. I would do it again, but I promised myself and EU that I’d stop cutting myself.”

Austria nodded again.

“Makes sense. But why did you begin to cut yourself in the first place?” He curiously asked.

UN sighed.

“Once I was been created, the countries didn’t at first even think about me being a living being. They treated me like I had no feelings nor needs. But as the time went on, they noticed it was a bit too late.”

“Why so?”

“Because I had begun to think about myself as nothing more than a tool to them. And as I always did the work, they dumped on me. Until I could not do it anymore, until I got too exhausted and collapsed from work, until I got too stressed and until I felt dead inside.”

“And?”

“And as they realized the mistake they had made, they tried to make it right. They gave me less work and tried to make sure I ate and slept. Mostly UK took care of me until I took care of myself for a while till, I met EU. He changed my point of view. He was always there for me, and I had not gotten used to someone else caring out for me and to love me. It felt all too good to be true and surreal.”

“But as I have become an extreme workaholic, my nature is hard to change. I am trying to but when I do not work, I feel like I am betraying everyone who is seeking refuge and advice from me.” UN looked to the wooden floor and felt depression wash all over his body.

Austria just stared at him, completely silenced. He didn’t know what to say nor what to do.

“How did you collapse?” He asked.

“Due to starvation… or rather, from lack of rest and nutrients. I did not take care of myself at all, I did not think at the time it was that relevant. I do now, I want to get better.” UN slightly smiled.

“But what about the cutting?” Austria asked.

“Oh, it was a pure accident when I was slicing tomatoes the knife slipped and made a cut to my finger. The sensation was intoxicating, and I wanted to feel that feeling again. I cut to feel good, and when I cut to feel good, I have to do it more to feel good. And that is how the addiction begun. I always cut myself when I did not feel good and cutting helped me. And did not help me at the same time.” UN explained.

Austria nodded as an understandment.

“Shall we go back inside with the others?” He requested.

UN nodded.


	8. Bruises

Germany had begun to prepare some food. He did not yet know what he would make and was open for any suggestions. Swiss was preparing a salmon, she decided that it would make a great main course.

EU watched from distance as they prepared the food and mentally slapped himself for forgetting that Germany would arrive in twenty. He did not know what to think about the situation.

He felt embarrassed. Even though if thought logically there was no reason to.

He did not yet know the extent of the bruises on his neck and was determined to find out. So, he went to his and UN’s bedroom and closed the door.

He then went by the mirror and was taken back how much damage UN had done to his neck. It was full of bites and bruised violet.

 _No wonder Germany was smiling that widely_. He thought. 

EU then remembered that he has an important meeting with UK tomorrow. He cursed his luck. Also the fact that UN would be required to attent that meeting as well made him uneasy. 

He didn't know if UN was mentally stable enough for the meeting. UK would definitely notice the bandages on UN's neck and be worried. 

And UK would ask about it from EU. UK had specifically asked EU to keep a close eye on UN.

EU had of course agreed. He loved UN and would do anything to help him. Even if it made him suffer sometimes. 

And now he felt terrible as he was supposed to help UN to get better, not worse.

He would have to tell UK the details. 

Then his mind came back to his neck. He did not know how he would cover up his neck.

He would likely have to bandage it and hide it under the collar of his suit shirt or if he manages to make a turtleneck work well with his suit jacket, he will absolutely use that combo.

He opened his dresser and searched for a white turtleneck and found one. It had been buried under a dozen of other turtlenecks and sweaters. He did not even remember owning that particular turtleneck at all.

No wonder it looked so small…

He sighed and looked at the turtleneck. He would definitely not fit in that turtleneck for sure. He had gained a lot of weight during the last 10 years as his life had got much more stressful. So many crises, and problems with his member countries, the Brexit, the situation in Poland...Scotland wanting to join EU after UK exits it. 

And UN unknowingly causing him stress.

As he looked himself from the mirror, he noticed how bloated his belly was. It literally looked like he could be 6 to 8 months pregnant. His love handles had also grown since the last time he had really paid any attention to the matter.

Then he remembered UN’s comment earlier.

_“You have gained weight.”_

UN was right.

EU just hoped that the issues with his member countries would get solved up so he could finally breathe in peace and not to be overly stressed out all the time.

Then maybe he could cut down his alcohol consumption a bit, and maybe to lose some weight too.

But then a different memory from earlier today came to mind. He remembered UN’s fingers between his fat rolls, and all the squeezes. He wanted to feel that sensation again and if he lost weight it would be impossible.

He sighed.

He at least would not gain any more weight if he did not want to lose any.

And then UN entered the room and as soon as he noticed that EU didn’t have a shirt on the sweet smile from earlier came back to surface.

EU rolled his eyes and watched as UN slided next to him.

“How’s your neck?” He asked with a grin.

“I would not mind at all if I did not happen to have an important meeting with UK tomorrow.” EU sighed before continuing. 

“...not to mention that you would also have to join the meeting as your presence is required.” EU added

UN grinned. He felt very guilty and a bit anxious. 

“I am sorry if that will ruin your meeting some way.” He apologized.

“I am working with a solution to the problem. I still do not know which option would be a better one; to bandage my neck and wear my typical suit, or to wear a turtleneck to cover up my neck and still wear the suit but without the suit shirt.” EU explained rhetorically.

UN thought about it.

“Why won’t you just use a dark blue make up to cover up your neck?” He asked.

EU’s expression paused and he slowly lifted his eyes from the mirror to look at UN.

“…that might actually work if it weren't for the wounds to get infected by the makeup.”

UN watched how two glowing golden rings very slowly and smoothly moved from the mirror to him. He just looked at them with awe.

“Damn that was smooth.” He thought out loud.

EU looked a bit puzzled.

“.. what again?” He asked.

UN smiled nicely.

“I really love how smoothly your eyes moved… so magical.”

EU just stared at UN with an unreadable expression.

“Ok.” He simply responded.

UN went to relax on the bed and looked at EU with a flirtatious smile.

EU’s cheeks went red.

“Are you sure you won’t mind others hearing you?” He asked and had a tiny smile on.

“I’m sure they’ve heard me before, I won’t mind.” UN flashed a sweet smile.

EU locked the bedroom door and noticed how UN was following his every move with his eyes. He stripped UN from his clothes before he tossed his own clothes to the floor.

UN looked excited. As he was lying on the bed with all his bones showing under his skin. He looked like a corpse.

EU was yet again anxious as he saw how dangerously thin UN really was. And the extent of his bandages which were covering up now almost 25% of his body.

“Are you sure you have enough energy? Maybe you should eat something first?” He asked with concern.

UN’s happy mood was gone.

“You may be right. I should probably have something to eat first.” He sighed, got himself to a sitting position and looked at EU with sad eyes.

EU opened his secret cabinet full of different kinds of candy, chocolate, nutrition drinks and apparently some old Scottish whiskey.

He gave UN a bottle of nutrition drink and gestured him to drink it up.

UN obeyed and did his best to finish the drink even though he felt like suffocating as the drink was a bit too much for him. He hadn’t eaten today much, and this meal was huge for him.

“It’s alright if you don’t finish it up completely, you can continue later.” EU reassured him and sat right next to him.

UN nodded and put the bottle aside. His earlier flirtatious smile was back.

EU was just red. He felt a bit happy.

UN observed how EU’s eyes widened as he slowly moved closer to him until their noses touched. Then UN kissed him and they both closed their eyes. UN slided his hands between EU’s love handles to hug him more intensively.

EU held UN carefully as he did not really want to touch his bones, but soon realized he could not avoid it. He then softly placed his hands-on UN’s ribs.

Then they just looked at each other in the eyes. They have been too busy to show any affection in these past seven months of their workaholic lifestyles. It usually won't get this badly out of hand but as UN's condition begun to decline they simply didn't have as much time together anymore. 

“We definitely need to have a romantic evening sometime soon.” EU softly rubbed his thumb on UN's neck.

UN nodded.

“Wine, roses, sex, bubble bath.” He listed with a smirk.

EU formed a tiny smile.

“Sounds good to me. How about something to eat too?” He requested.

UN fake smiled.

“Yes, and I will promise to eat.”

EU frowned.

“You know how much I dislike when you do that.” He softly cupped UN's face.

UN sheepishly smiled and buried his face on EU's chest. It looked a bit odd as UN was so much taller than EU. UN was always the one to bury himself to someone else's lap or chest, he didn't know why but it felt safe and comfortable even though he had to bend down and crook his back in order to do so.

EU was always anxious to hug or to bury himself onto UN as everything he could feel was bones, bones and bones everywhere. UN was definitely hard to hug.

* * *

Germany watched as UN and Austria went for a smoke and noticed that they were having a conversation. But as they were on the balcony Germany could not hear them.

It looked like UN had told Austria something very personal as his expression looked very fragile and hurt. 

Austria looked dead as usual, he showed little to no facial expression but his eye spoke in behalf. 

After a while UN came back inside and disappeared to his bedroom.

Austria decided that it was time to smoke some weed, so he pulled a weed-cigarette from his pocket and lit it up. He inhaled the smoke slowly and looked like he enjoyed it very much.

Germany had not ever even thought about smoking weed. He had always thought of it as a terrible habit. His mind didn’t change even though his boyfriend was smoking it regularly.

After he had prepared potatoes and vegetables it was time to just wait for the salmon to cook.

It was very quiet for a while until they heard UN giggling and slightly screaming.

Then it was quiet for a great twenty to thirty minutes until they heard UN gasping in a very suspicious manner. 

Swiss and Germany grinned at each other.

“Oh, come on! Do they really have to do it now…” Swiss rolled her eyes and smiled.

Germany shrugged.

“We disturbed something earlier so it’s only fair to let them continue.” He pointed out.

Swiss looked at Austria who was still chain-smoking weed and cigarettes.

“Maybe we should just join him and not to listen UN having an orgasm.” She requested.

Germany exploded to laugh.

“Yeah, I absolutely agree with you.”

Swiss grinned.

* * *

As the three teens all were sitting around the dining table, eating. The atmosphere was warm yet a bit tense. Swiss eyed Austria a bit mad as she absolutely hated weed.

Swiss was also mad about the fact that UN and EU had decided that it would be an excellent time to have sex while others were trying to eat in peace. 

Austria reeked from weed and his eye was red. He had a tiny, teeny, almost invisible smile on.

Germany noticed Swiss' expression and frowned.

“I know that you hate weed... but is it really doing much harm for him.” He softly pointed out.

Swiss rolled her eyes.

“I guess I just don't accept any drugs.” She sighed.

As Germany was about to say something, his phone rang. It was Russia.

“Hello?” Germany greeted.

“Hey, vould it be alrright for you for I and Amerrika to visit you?” Russia asked.

“Yes, of course. Why?” He asked out of curiosity.

Russia was silent for a while until he responded.

“UK and Frrance are sleeping, and Amerrika forrgot his key home. Ve kan't norr vant to vake them up.” He explained.

“I see... yes, you can come here.” Germany sadly smiled and ended the call.

Swiss and Austria were staring at him with questioning expressions.

“USA and Russia will be here soon.” Germany informed.


	9. Depression Meltdown

UN was lying on the bed, exhausted. He felt like every muscle in his fragile body was torn. He couldn't move. He focused on breathing and closed his eyes for a while until opening them again to observe his surroundings.

EU didn't look any better as he also was looking very exhausted. He was sweating and slightly panting.

EU has a bad stamina mainly caused by being a quite overweight.

He then very painfully sat back up and looked at UN.

“We should take a shower.” EU recommended with a tired tone.

UN nodded and as he tried to sat up his body failed to complete the task. He had a pained look in his eyes.

“I can't move.” He admitted in panic.

EU's tired mood was instantly gone.

“Are your energy levels lower than usual?” EU asked him.

UN nodded.

“Yes, I think so.”

“Are you able to take any nutrients in at the moment?” EU asked.

UN yet again just nodded. He was too exhausted to talk if not absolutely needed to.

EU stood up and took another nutrient drink from the cabinet, opened it and gave it to UN who slowly drank it.

He drank it all.

“Another one?” EU asked.

UN nodded.

He drank another and waited for it to 'kick in'.

After about 20 to 25 minutes later UN begun to feel a bit more energized, so he sat up.

“Are you able to carry me to the bathroom?” He asked.

EU thought about how difficult it would be and sighed.

“I will definitely try to but there's no guarantee for success.” He looked at UN with doubt and put a towel on.

UN slowly nodded and tried to get himself to standing position but as he was standing he felt his legs to give in.

EU immediately supported UN from falling and handed him a towel to put on.

UN took the towel and put it on.

“I might be able to walk if you support me.”

EU nodded and they slowly but steady exited the bedroom.

The first thing they saw was Russia laughing at obviously embarrassed USA who was hiding his face with his hands, face red.

Then Germany noticed them and a smile found its way to his face, EU's neck was so full of bites and wounds that it was a miracle it wasn't bleeding much. He knew that it was always EU who ended up bitten but it still sometimes surprised him.

But as he saw how bad UN's condition looked like his smile vanished immediately. He went to help EU to support UN.

“What happened to him?” Germany asked.

EU shook his head.

“We shan't discuss this now, at the moment UN needs our help.” EU replied with a frown.

UN was on verge to fall unconscious but fought back and managed to stay awake during the walk to the bathroom.

“UN needs proper nutrition and water, are you able to fetch those for him while I help him to wash himself up?” EU asked Germany.

Germany nodded and left the two alone while he went to the kitchen.

EU locked the bathroom door and helped UN to sat down on a chair.

“You need to tell me immediately if your energy levels are too low the next time.” He made sure UN understood what he said as he looked like he wasn't really there.

UN nodded.

“...I'm sorry that I am like this.” He shamefully apologized.

EU frowned.

“There's no need to apologize. We will get you better in no time.” 

UN sadly looked at EU.

“It's glad that at least you feel this way. I am sorry to admit but I have already giving up to rise from this hole.”

EU's eyes went wide.

"No, don't give up. There's hope for you. Remember that I will help you to get better and I do not plan to let you give up." EU's glare was pure determination.

UN opened his eyes to their normal state and studied EU's eyes.

“You really do believe that there's hope for me, don't you.”

EU placed his hands on UN's shoulders. He was silent for a while until he softly spoke.

“Yes, and I will not stop until you're whole again.” 

UN was yet again stunned by the love EU had for him.

“You really do love me.” 

EU smiled.

“I do and always will. Now, let's get you cleaned up.” 

There was a small smile forming on UN's face.

* * *

Germany was searching for something that was easy to eat, energy-rich and had vitamins.

He decided that protein bars and orange juice would do the trick.

Swiss came to see what Germany was doing.

“What are you going to do with those?” She asked.

Germany halted what he was doing and turned to see a curious Swiss observing him.

“Those are for UN, he's alarmingly low on energy.” He explained.

Swiss smirked.

“No wonder. It sounded intense after all.” 

Germany smiled and face palmed.

“Yeah, but right now it's not even funny.” 

Swiss looked concerned.

“Did you see the state of EU's neck?” 

Germany looked haunted.

“I wish I could unsee that. It looked like someone or something tried to kill it.” Germany shuddereed.

Swiss laughed.

“I didn't know UN had that sharp teeth, the man looks like he couldn't hurt a butterfly.”

Germany looked disgusted.

“Can we not talk about this, okay?”

“Oh, I'm sorry Germany. I should know better than talk about your family like that.” She apologized.

Germany sighed.

“it's okay.”

They then turned to see what USA and Russia were doing.

* * *

The salmon was finally ready to be eaten and Germany had set the table. Most of them were present at the moment.

UN was struggling to drink his fourth nutrition drink but tried not to show it too much. 

He had bandaged EU's neck, and cleaned the wounds on the neck he had made as he bit EU a bit too hard, _again_.

EU was on the balcony calling countries back as he had by mistake silenced his phone and now it was just a disaster to get everything done. 

Russia was happily eating the fish and potatoes, America was mainly eating the salad as he had eaten a snack not very long time ago.

Austria was still at the balcony, smoking weed.

“How are you feeling?” Germany asked UN.

UN fake smiled.

“Better, I wish eating would be easier.” He sighed.

Swiss looked at UN and then took out her phone to search something. After a while she found what she was looking for. A picture of UN taken at the 1982 and he had large angel wings.

“UN, may I ask you a question?” She bit her lip, she didn't know if it was a sensitive subject or not.

UN nodded.

“You had wings at some point, what happened to them?” She asked.

Other countries' eyes went wide and Russia looked like he was remembering something.

UN had hoped that no-country would ever ask about that.

“If I may ask, why are you interested about them?” UN nervously asked.

Swiss and Russia exchanged a glare and they asked together.

“We have a memory of you having them, and no memory of you losing them.” They asked UN.

UN was having trouble keeping his fake-neutral expression on. He felt it slowly cracking.

“I do not wish to talk about it at the moment.” UN mumbled.

USA's interest was granted.

“I didn't even realize you once had wings to be honest.” 

Russia gave America a warning glare to tell him to back the fuck off.

America nervously smiled and pretended to have a particularly high interest on the tomato he had on the plate.

UN was putting an effort to keep himself calm when he was panicking and screaming internally.

Swiss showed Germany the photo she found.

Germany carefully studied the photo and saw UN wearing a short-sleeved suit but had bandages on his wrists, his arms were clean from cuts, his eyes didn't look as dull as they looked now. His wings were proudly lifted up, he looked pretty healthy. He was already too thin but nothing compared to today's him whose skeleton looked like it was trying to escape his skin. There were other countries standing right next to him: Soviet Union and EU.

Soviet had a neutral expression and hands on his hips, UN was slightly smiling and had folded hands, and EU had a formal smile and was apparently smoking a cigar. Soviet looked as muscular as he is today and EU a lot thinner.

Germany would definitely show EU this photo.

“Russland, your father is also in this photo.” He informed.

Russia's attention was granted and he came closer to see better.

“He looks the same, imprressive.”

* * *

EU hated the burning and tingling feeling of his neck. UN had really destroyed his neck this time, he really was into biting EU's neck such an aggressive way.

He then noticed Austria who was happily smoking weed.

“How much do you smoke weed a day usually?” EU asked him.

Austria slowly turned his head as he heard someone speaking to him.

He had to really use his brainpower to listen as he was insanely high as the moment. 

“Oh.. It depends. Hard to say.” Austria just shrugged.

EU frowned. He didn't like to talk to countries who were high as they would not really understand what they were being said to.

He sat on a balcony chair right next to Austria. He itched for a cigarette, he hadn't smoked for a while.

He only would smoke in special occasions such as events and formal meetings. And to perish the stress away sometimes.

He had once promised Germany to quit smoking but they both know that it was always useless to promise that.

But the good news was that he had managed to banish the most of the addiction and wasn't smoking regularly anymore.

It was still hard for him not to relapse to smoking on a daily basis.

Now the stress was trying to eat him alive.

He took out a pack of cigarettes and pulled one out. He placed it on his lips and lit it up.

* * *

The teens were all looking at the photo together. Even UN. His gloomy mood was gone as he was now remembering some not so bad memories as he looked at the photo.

“About the question about my wings, I suppose that I could tell you the story behind that.” UN slightly smiled.

The teens' eyes lighted up and they gathered around him to listen better.

“I earned my wings by spreading the message of peace worldwide.” UN told them.

“Spreading peace is still one of my main priorities even though it is nowadays a bit harder than back in the day.”

Russia looked a bit surprised.

“..But if you earrned yourr vings by sprreading peace, did you lose them by failing at peace?” He asked.

UN looked a bit haunted.

“... I am failing at it all the time. So, no.” He admitted and felt a bit more depressed than usual now. Even his halo dimmed noticeably.

Germany placed his hand on UN's shoulder.

“No, you're not failing at it. You are doing an amazing job at it.” He reassured him.

UN didn't believe him. He knew that he fails at his duties, but not to gain any unwanted suspicion he slightly nodded as an understanding. 

“I had my wings for decades until they slowly were decaying away.”

“What caused the decaying?” USA asked.

UN sighed and looked very sad.

“I suspect that it was my feelings of helplessness and depression which caused them to fade away.” As he was telling the story behind his wings the realization of his depression becoming a common knowledge was now inevitable in this situation. 

His stress and anxiety were slowly rising up inside of him. He was slightly shaking already.

The teens' eyes went wide.

“How come that we didn't know about this?” USA asked. 

UN looked very uncomfortable. 

“I didn't want to worry you nor did I wanted it to affect my duties. If I told you, you would have tried to help me and get hurt in the progress. And just you to know, I have great problems with anxiety so it doesn't help much that I know I should have told about those ages ago.”

“WHAT?” The teens except Germany asked in loud at the same time.

Germany was now hugging UN as he noticed the signs of anxiety on him. He grimaced as all he felt was UN's skeleton but was hugging him nonetheless. 

“We know countries who could have helped you!” Swiss exclaimed. 

Germany for a moment halted hugging UN placed a hand to her shoulder to silently tell her to stop. As she turned to look at Germany she saw him shaking his head a a 'no'. And then returned hugging UN again.

“I didn't want you to get angry that's another reason why I didn't tell.” UN told them in a defeated tone.

Swiss' anger was gone and what she now felt was sadness. As she looked at UN she saw how broken being he was. His eyes looked dead.

“I am sorry, I shouldn't have yelled at you like that” She apologized. 

UN accepted her apology. 

“I understand your reaction. I know that I should have told you about my problems, I just felt like I could manage on my own.”

“I am surprised that you managed that well considering the amount of work you were given.” Germany pointed out and was now rubbing UN's back. UN seemed to like that and was slightly calming down.

“...I had my ways to temporarily escape the negative feelings.” UN admitted.

Germany and Swiss shook their heads. 

“You need to find healthier ways.” Swiss recommended. 

USA was looking at others and and he had the facial expression on when one feels like they have missed something very important. 

“What are you guys talking about?” USA asked.

“You do notice his bandages?” Germany asked USA whose eyes went wide.

UN folded his arms trying to not gain more attention to his completely bandaged arms. He had no free skin left to cut at the moment.

“Ah shit. I thought they were from the sex. I haven't seen you in a t-shirt for a great while so I couldn't have known.” USA grinned.

Everyone else facepalmed at the same time.

“Now as the truth is out I might as well say it. I am addicted to cutting myself, I can't help it. Even if I don't want to do it, I have to do it. The negative feelings won't go away on their own.” UN confessed and felt like he was slowly breaking apart.

Germany hugged him more intensively.

“All I feel is either the constantly emptiness or negative feelings.” He told them with a sad tone.

“Even when someone is caring about you?” Swiss asked him.

UN wasn't sure.

“It is hard to describe. I just feel like I am a burden to the one who happens to care about me even though I greatly appreciate it.” He tried to explain.

“How is EU managing with all of this?” Germany asked. He had been worried about EU's mental health for a while as he had noticed it to decline immediately when UN begun to collapse from depression yet again.

UN sighed.

“He is trying his best to help me I know it. He loves me a way too much, he gets hurt in the progress as I am constantly feeling down. It is very difficult to him.” He admitted. 

“What I can say is that if you want to get better you need to talk to a professional about your feelings.” Swiss told him the obvious. 

UN nodded.

“I have already agreed on talking to a professional, I promised EU that.”

“Kould you tell us the rrest of the storry of yourr vings?” Russia asked. 

UN nodded.

“The decaying didn't happen overnight. At first I saw that I was losing feathers, then a large segments of the wings were becoming bald. Until I had no feathers left, only the bones and skin.”

“Where did the skeleton of your wings disappear?” USA asked. Others looked horrified.

“I tore them apart, it hurted like hell but as they were practically already dead they were useless and so darn ugly.” UN explained.

“YOU PULLED YOUR OWN BONES APART BY FORCE?!” USA was horrified.

“Yes, I have done worse things to myself so it wasn't that difficult to accomplish.” UN said it like it was nothing and realized it a far too late.

“What else have you done to yourself?” Germany asked with great concern. He halted hugging him and turned to look at his eyes.

UN knew that he had messed up and lying won't save him anymore.

“I have on purpose shot myself to the head. As I do not die of anything else than if all of my member countries decide to end my life, I could do as much harm to myself as I wish to. Although that was very long ago, in the year of 1977” He admitted in shame.

“...but, why?” Swiss asked.

“Because I feel like I am nothing but a failure.” 

The other teens now noticed how anxious he was. He was shaking and was struggling to breathe easily.

Germany felt helpless that even him hugging UN, and him trying to calm him down would not prevent him from having an anxiety attack.

UN desperately needed to calm down.

His earlier cuts began to itch violently and he was battling the urge to scratch them too much to avoid opening them.

He needed to cut. He needed to smoke. 

He really wished that he was dead.

But he knows the even more effective way to handle this.

One way to escape his anxiety and negative feelings is to ignore them completely and not to feel anything. He accepted the request to quit feeling and was now numb to avoid an emotional burnout. His skin tone turned to gray.

Teens gasped.

“What is going on?!” Germany asked UN who surprisingly showed no reaction to his asking.

“UN, what did you do?” Germany tried again this time succeeding. 

UN lifted his eyes from the floor to Germany's.

“Sometimes I need to completely quit my emotions to survive. Don't worry I am fine.” UN unconvincingly told them.

They didn't not worry, they began to worry even more.

“No no no, you kan't just shut down yourr emotions and feelings like that! It isn't healthy!” Russia exclaimed in panic.

“I am fully aware of the consequences, I will have to face the feelings later on when I decide to feel again.” UN told him with his now monotone voice.

Germany had made up his mind about asking help from EU and was now going to the balcony.

And as he opened the door and stepped outside he saw Austria sleeping on the balcony couch happily, and EU looking very stressed and smoking apparently his fifth cigarette.

Germany frowned and went to stand right in front of EU and made an eye contact with him. 

“Bro, I need your help.” Germany asked him in panic.

EU's eyes widened.

“It is about UN, isn't it?” He asked in a tired toneand took a drag of his cigarette.

Germany nodded.

“He turned gray!”

EU paled a bit.

“Ah Sheiße, I really hate when he does that. It takes very long time to get him to release the feelings as he obviously don't want to feel those things. It is his defense mechanism to avoid the complete feelings meltdown. Not a very healthy one but effective as shit.” EU explained.

Germany calmed down.

“How do you help him to release the negative feelings?” Germany asked.

“I usually let him hug me for hours until he slowly decide to let the negative emotions out and I will be there for him if he wants to talk. I cannot force him to feel again, it has to be his own willing to do so.” EU sighed and took the last drag of his cigarette and placed it on the ashtray.

“Seems like I have work to do.” He stood up and gestured Germany to come with him.


	10. An Important Meeting

As EU and Germany stepped back inside the house they stopped on their tracks instantly.

The teens were hugging UN who was as gray as one can be. UN looked like he was dead inside, his eyes weren't really looking at anything. He just stared.

EU felt cold shivers ran down his spine as he was silently observing the situation.

"Oh boy, it's even worse than I thought." EU sighed and shook his head.

Germany looked horrified.

"What are we going to do with him?" He asked.

EU looked like he knew the answer but was trying to deny it even from himself. It was a painful decision.

"We are going to have to send him to WHO, only he can help him the right way." EU closed his eyes.

Germany's eyes widened.

"You know... I was thinking about WHO earlier today when UN told us about his depression..."

EU snapped his eyes open and turned to look at Germany with a doubtful glare.

"He told you about that? What else did he tell you?" He asked in pure interest and concern.

Germany didn't know what to think.

"We were only discussing about his lost wings when he apparently by accident told us the real reason behind it,"

EU cued him to continue.

"And he told us about his cutting." Germany carefully added.

EU didn't think UN would actually tell the teens about his problems as UN very much so was ashamed by them himself.

"Okay, you take care of him for a moment when I go and get WHO here."

"it's 11 PM, would it be wise to get him tomorrow?" Germany pointed out.

EU glanced at his watch and cursed his luck.

"Scheiße... I have an important meeting with UK tomorrow, I can't miss it." EU sighed.

"Then you go to that meeting and we others get WHO here in the meantime." Germany reassured him.

EU was a bit uncertain about Germany's suggestion but as he didn't think of any better option he accepted it.

"Fine, you do that."

Germany smiled.

* * *

EU had been awake for the most of the night, he couldn't sleep. UN sleeping peacefully right next to him wasn't calming, not at all. He was gray, unfeeling. He looked like there wasn't actually anyone inside. He looked like an empty husk.

He checked the time, it was 6:01 AM, luckily it was already morning, he didn't have to wait any longer. He got up, dressed himself and went to brush his teeth. As he was brushing he looked himself from the mirror. His halo was a bit dim, his under eyes were a bit darker than usual, he looked very tired.

Maybe a few cups of coffee would help him.

He exited the bathroom and went to kitchen. Germany was having breakfast with Austia, they greeted him. Then EU took a mug from the cabinet above the sink. He prepared the coffee beans and turned the coffee machine on. He leaned on the kitchen counter and closed his eyes. He rubbed his eyes from his left hand. He felt very tired.

"Long night?" Germany asked.

EU nodded and opened his eyes.

"Ja, didn't get much sleep."

Germany felt sad.

"I will have WHO to check UN today, don't worry about it." He reassured.

EU nodded and noticed the coffee was brewed. He poured his mug full and left it on the counter to cool a bit of before taking a sip.

"I should have alerted WHO a much earlier, I had thought UN would get better without professional help. I was wrong." He felt defeated.

Austria's eye went gray as he thought about UN's whole body becoming gray.

"I unfortunately or rather, fortunately didn't see him turning gray, I only saw the result."

EU felt hurt as he thought about it. UN was so precious to him and he would never forgive himself if UN wouldn't heal.

"It's just... so difficult for me to watch and do nothing about it. But, I can't, I am not able to make UN heal." He closed his eyes.

Germany rose up from the chair and went to hug EU.

"You need to acnowledge the fact that it's not your fault. You can't blame yourself over this." He made sure EU took in the words he spoke.

EU hug Germany back and nodded.

"Vielen Danke." EU thanked him and Germany pulled away.

* * *

It was 11 AM and the meeting should take place on 12:00 PM. He should be going soon.

EU was adjusting his bandages around his neck to hide them under the collar of his turtleneck. He managed to hide them, well most of them.

He put his suit jacket on, took his stuff and left the house.

He felt very horrible. His neck was in pain, his heart ached whenever he thought about how bad UN's condition was becoming, and the Brexit. He had to get Brexit over with, he and UK hadn't managed to get an agreement of almost anything they discussed earlier. But now EU had a plan, a plan not even UK would disagree with.

He started his car and drove.

He felt a bit worried that UN's presence was pretty much required but right now it was out of question. He was thinking about calling one of UN's agencies. Perhaps there would be someone who could compensate UN's authority well enough. 

Then someone came to his mind, WTO. A World Trade Organization. They could help him to negotiate with UK. EU decided to make a few calls about the matter.

* * *

WTO was on their office, going through different aspects of paperwork and was almost on their zen-zone like state which would allow them to work very efficiencily. But it was interrupted by a phone ringing. 

WTO groaned and put the paperwork aside, rubbed their tired eyes and answered the phone.

"Hello, is there anything you would need?" They answered.

"Hello, yes actually. UN is unavailable to be present in an important negotiation, would you be able to be there?" EU asked.

WTO rolled their eyes.

"At first I need to know what the negotiation is about, then I can think about it." They pinched their nose bridge in frustration.

"Oh, yes. Brexit. This is the last chance to make a deal with UK. I really need someone to help me." EU asked very nicely.

WTO thought about it. They had already enough work to begin with, no more work was needed to add to the pile. But as they thought about Brexit and the way it was going... They decided to help EU.

"Fine, I will be there in twenty." 

"Nice to hear that. Thank you." 

And with that WTO ended the call.

They rose from the chair, stretched their limbs and flexed their wings, and grimaced when they heard their spine popping a bit. It hurt like hell, they had sat for a way too long and in wrong position.

Their head hurt like there was a drill inside it. They sighed and took some pain medication to get rid of the annoying sensation. WTO looked at their stuff and the pain it would cause them to back everything they needed. It annoyed them to no end to collect stuff from the floor as their back was obviously protesting. 

WTO had injured their back when they had carried a box of paperwork up the stairs, mis-stepped a step and fell to the stairs. It felt like the spine had been damaged very badly but they hadn't had the time to visit WHO yet as the accident had happened only two or three days ago.

They got themself ready and exited the apartment and was heading to the location the Brexit negotiations would be held at.

* * *

EU arrived to the UK's and exited his car. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes a bit but opened them very soon after as he heard someone flying near him. He looked up and saw WTO.

"Hello there, we ready?" EU asked.

WTO rolled their eyes and landed right next to EU.

"Aye, alloweth's receiveth this ov'r with." He flatly answered and landed their eyes on EU. Their icy glare made EU very uncomfortable. WTO would use old English only when he was in a bad mood.

EU had some bad vibes about them.

"I know that this is a lot to ask from you especially this fast. But it means the world to me that you are here." He apologized.

WTO halted the icy glare and nodded.

"Andgitfullíc."

And with that they entered the house and were greeted by Scotland.

"G'day lads." He smiled and closed the door behind them.

EU felt stressed and now WTO staring at him didn't help him at all.

"Could you please not do that." He tiredly asked them.

WTO turned to look away but was now staring at him from the corner of their eyes.

EU gave up. He didn't want to put any more energy to that.

Soon they arrived to UK's office.

"Good day, please have a seat." UK smiled a bit rudely but as he saw that there was someone accompanying EU his smile vanished as he noticed who it was.

WTO stepped inside the room and proudly lifted their folded wings a bit and looked down at UK with despise.

"Thee shalt beest asham'd of thiself, Thee has't only **thyself** to censure." WTO ominously levitated right in front of UK, eyes full of hate.

UK's eyes widened to the max. It was indeed his fault that the negotiations hadn't made any progress. UK was always the one to reject any offer EU had for him. UK's actions had been illogical.

"I am sorry, I really am." UK apologized and cued EU to take the Brexit agreement papers out and to put them on the table for him to sign.

UK signed the papers and looked miserable. But felt better that the Brexit didn't escalate to the Hard-Brexit when no agreement would be made.

"I will keep a close eye on you, don't thee to even think about doing anything irrationally stupid again." WTO touched UK's shoulder with the tip of their wing and pushed him aside and exited the room, EU following.

When they got outside EU looked thoughtful.

"What's with the anger?" He asked.

WTO was levitating in air and slowly lifted their eyes too EU.

"I was not even _that_ angry this time." He was staring right to EU's soul, this time not piercingly. 

EU nodded.

"Nevertheless, thank you for your help." He thanked and was preparing to leave until WTO stopped him.

"If I am allowed to ask, what's with UN?" They asked.

EU frowned.

"He isn't well. He turned gray yesterday."

WTO eyes widened.

"He turned gray? Thee mean he went numb?" They asked again.

EU looked uncomfortable.

"I do not prefer talking about this when we're in public, you could go with me and I can show you." He recommended.

WTO nodded and as they got to EU's car they looked at the car and shook their head.

"How I am going to fit inside of _that_?" They asked.

EU smirked.

"You will be fine, UN can fit inside of it too."

WTO's eyes went wide.

"... _what?_ "

EU laughed.

"It's been while since we have talked." He smiled.

WTO nodded and slightly smiled. They felt happy to meet old friends but at the same time they felt like screaming. They didn't like to be around others if they could be alone and work.

* * *

Germany and Austria were having a conversation until they saw Russia walking towards them.

"Morning, Russland." Germany greeted. Austria nodded to Russia.

Russia smiled.

"Доброе утро, Германия." (Good morning, Germany) He greeted.

Germany looked at the time, 11:22 AM. He could now call WHO.

"Austria, can you make sure USA wakes up, we have a lesson in an hour. I need to make a call." Germany requested.

Austria nodded and drank the rest of his coffee and went upstairs.

Germany went to the balcony and took his phone out. He browsed his contacts list and finally found WHO's phone number. He pressed 'dial' and waited for a while until WHO picked up the phone.

"Hello, Germany." WHO answered.

"Hey, we have a situation going on here." Germany begun to explain.

"Yes? What is it about?" He asked.

"It's about UN, he turned gray yesterday. Could you please have a look at him?" Germany asked nicely.

WHO was silent for a while.

"I'll be there soon, it sounds like I need to do some tests at him. I need to grab my medical kit and then I am on my way."

Germany felt relieved.

"Thank you very much." He thanked.

"It was important that you called me, I will see what I can do." 

And with that WHO ended the call. Germany put his phone away and felt as the tension slowly was lessening in his body.

He stayed on the balcony for a bit before going back inside.

As he opened the door he saw that Austria had indeed managed to wake USA up. They were chatting and Swiss was in the shower. They turned to look at him as he stepped inside the house.

"Is WHO coming over?" USA asked.

Germany nodded and others seemed to be in much relief hearing that. UN was sitting on an armchair, unfeeling, gray and dull. He didn't seem to even notice that the others were talking as he kept staring the wall. He looked creepy as he was so dead-like.

"I really feel sorry for him." Germany shook his head as he looked at UN.

Others agreed.

"I rreally hope that WHO guy gets him betterr." Russia sighed.

Soon the doorbell rang and Germany went to open the door. It was WHO, he looked very serious.

"Is UN here?" He asked Germany.

Germany nodded.

"Yes, follow me."

The teens watched as a tall figure approached them and as he saw the state UN was at his wings lowered.

"It looks like UN had managed to get in an apathetic state. His mind is kind of locked and he cannot access it without struggle." WHO explained.

The teens were thinking.

"Why is he not struggling then?" USA asked.

WHO turned to look at him and shook his head.

"He has lost his spark to battle against it. Simply said: He is too tired to fight it on his own, he needs help with that." He explained.

USA nodded.

"Will you help him?" Germany asked.

"Of course, but keep in mind that it will take time for him to 'open up' the so said lock I told you earlier." WHO sighed.

He opened his medical kit and took his notebook out, made some notes, inspected UN closely and tested if he was still aware of his surroundings. He was but wasn't into reacting any of it at all. He was numb.

"I will at first try to get him to open the lock and after that he will start therapy sessions with me." He pointed out as they were obviously wondering about what UN would need to go through to heal.

The teens nodded.

After a great while they noticed that EU had came back. But not alone. With someone tall and scary looking. As soon as EU noticed that WHO had arrived he went to ask about the healing progress of UN's. While WHO explained EU the matter, WTO was observing the teens.

"Who are you?" USA asked.

Others facepalmed. WTO formed a smirk.

"I am WTO, who did thee think I was?" They levitated in front of USA, their glance piercing.

USA's eyes widened.

"Oh, ..I didn't think you'd be that tall." He nervously laughed.

WTO put the tip of their wing to USA's chin and forged him to put his eyes on their eyes.

"I will as tall as I am meant to be. Is that an issue for thyself?"

USA shook his head in shame and looked down. WTO's smirk vanished and they continued to watch as WHO and EU were talking.

"I will have to take him to closed ward to ensure he won't be able to harm himself in any way." WHO explained.

EU looked sad.

"I know it's best for him but I cannot help feeling sad that he would be gone for months."

WHO placed his hand on EU's shoulder.

"You can visit him when his color is back. And it shouldn't take very long, maybe from six weeks to twelve weeks. It all depends on his will to heal, proper medication and right counselling." He reassured.

EU nodded.

"I am sure that now that UN gets professional help his condition will get better."

WHO nodded.

"It would be best if I were to hospitalize UN right now. I will call staff to help me get him to the mental hospital." He excused himself to the balcony to make a phone call.

Others were just looking at each other and back to UN.

"We will give you our support, EU. It must be very hard to you." Germany hugged EU.

EU hugged him back.

"I am not sure if I am able to handle this... but I will try to."

They watched as mental health staff came to their house, WHO came back inside and asked the staff to safely transport UN to the mental hospital. And as UN was out of sight WHO turned to EU again.

"Whatever you will need, just call me. I will help." He promised and took his leave.


	11. Mental Hospital

WHO walked down the hallway in deep thoughts. He had to organize a plan to get UN back to shape mentally as well as physically.

UN would of course be monitored very closely 24/7 just in case something were to happen.

He would have to eat everything he was brought with. He needed to gain weight, his current weight wasn't ideal to say at the very least. UN barely weighted more than a 170 cm teenager, a very skinny teenager. He didn't blame EU as UN was obviously having some very concerning self-destructive anorectic thoughts. 

UN was still gray as ash but showed signs of potential.

His eyes were eerily dead-appealing. WHO had never seen anyone alive with such an eyes before.

He had diagnosed UN with severe depression, PTSD, anxiety, anorexia, and an addiction to hurt himself in various ways such as starving- and cutting himself. UN really was medically a though nut to crack. It took WHO days to get UN to talk to him and after he decided he had told WHO everything, he chose selective mutism towards WHO.

WHO was very concerned about that.

He had prescribed UN with very aggressive medication to take down the depression, PTSD and anxiety. UN was closely monitored and every pill had to be taken. After the medication would improve UN's mental condition enough he would begin therapy with WHO.

WHO had everything planned and was pleased with his plan.

They had to give UN nicotine patches to keep his nicotine withdrawal at bay. He would of course be allowed to smoke as soon as his mental condition was improved enough. The best option of course would be to quit smoking but asking that from UN now was out of the question.

When comes to UN's self-harm addiction, it had been able to limit to the minimum by medication. Even the medication wasn't able to keep them 100% at bay. UN would daily have panic attacks caused by the withdrawal of cutting. He was so addicted that his fingernails had to be removed (painlessly of course) to ensure he would not be able to scratch himself. UN's room would be free of any sharp edges or objects which he could use to harm himself. His previous cuts had been professionally cleaned and bandaged. The bandages would be changed every day and the cuts be inspected to avoid them from getting infected.

UN didn't look pleased that he was not able to harm himself anymore but eventually accepted the decision and stopped resisting.

UN showed little to no facial emotions and he kept his emoting at minimal. It wasn't from his choosing, he just felt nothing.

WHO had calculated that UN's full recovery would very likely take up to at least six to eight months. And even after recovering, his health would occasionally be monitored to ensure it wasn't declining.

WHO felt sad that UN's spirit had been demolished to pieces, he and UN had so many good memories back then. He and UN were very close, they basically were doing the same thing as job but different aspects. UN always had a passion towards peace and justice when WHO had a passion to healthcare.

WHO remembered how similar looking him and UN once were. They both back then got wings, now only he has wings when UN doesn't. He had seen the signs of UN's wings decaying away but was unable to do anything because UN had asked him to not put his nose to his business.

WHO felt like such a fool that he had once listened to that request so illogical. He felt guilty. But he had had time to process his guilt and had found inner peace with himself with that.

He remembered the times when he and UN would fly on the sky together and feel the purest form of freedom there is.

WHO hadn't flown in ages and was tempted to fly once again. 

He stepped outside the building and walked on the grass. He opened his wings and lifted them up and flapped them a few times to get the feathers on their right places as they were a bit messy caused by lack of usage. But as he flapped them he felt them becoming sore. He noticed that he barely had any muscles left on the wings and he would need to practice if he wanted to use them someday.

He sighed and lowered his wings so that they touched the grass. He didn't fold them as he felt like they could use some air conditioning.

He looked at his surroundings and saw that the weather was actually very nice. The sun was shining, there were barely one cloud in the sky, it was autumn and the colors of the trees were very breathtaking. He had always loved autumn because it was the season of changes and flora and fauna preparing for dormancy.

He decided that a walk for do him good.

As he walked he kept his wings lifted up enough not to touch the ground as he didn't want them to get dirty. The mental hospital had a park right next to it and the park was huge. It was a bit more a garden than an actual park but it was named as 'The Hope Park' so he stuck with calling it a park. The park had a large pond in the middle of it and three huge fountains evenly placed on the water. Large oak and maple trees, pink and peach-colored roses, cattails, green lively grass, large bushes of Hedera helix and a couple of benches.

As he was admiring the roses he saw that there were little and big bumblebees working on the roses, they were pollinating the flowers, eating their sweet nectar and pollen. And buzzing loudly as they used their special talent called "Buzz-pollinating" where a bumblebee would vibrate her body to get access to the pollen inside the pollen pockets of the flower. The flower would only give the pollen out if it was vibrated a certain way. Fascinating indeed.

Then his attention was on the trees again.

Those beautiful red, orange, yellow, brown and green leaves were very beautiful. It was caused by the tree withdrawing all of its chlorophyll out of the leaves and store it on the stem and roots to grown new beautiful leaves the next spring. Trees fascinated him too.

There was hardly anything which would not fascinate him. The world was so full of unsolved mysteries and misunderstood information. He had obliged his life to learn and share his discoveries with others as much as he can. Even though he was socially alarmingly awkward.

He knew all about psychology, behavior and nature of beings but was still unable to behave 'naturally' to others. Others did not find his way of behaving normal and was usually crept out of his clumsy socializing. He would never stop trying but it still upsets him a great deal.

He is fully aware that it is caused by autism, his brain just isn't functioning as it should be and he has accepted that. He is fine with it.

He thought about sitting on one of the benches but realized that his legs would be too long to sit comfortably so he dismissed the idea and instead sat on the soft grass.

He found himself observing other countries who were hanging around the park as well. He saw Poland, Belarus, Kazakhstan, Mongolia, China, Taiwan, Estonia and Finland there. They seemed to be having good time. Poland and Kazakhstan were flying and apparently playing. They laughed and chattered. The others were having peaceful conversations.

WHO looked at the time and noted that his shift would continue in ten minutes.

He rose up from the grass, dusted himself off and was walking back to the hospital when he was stopped by Poland accidentally crashing on to him while flying. WHO managed to keep his balance adjusting it by moving his wings in a certain way. Poland was on the ground and he looked like he got hurt.

"Are you feeling okay?" WHO asked.

Poland tried to get up but winced and hissed. He could not stand. His leg seemed to have gotten injured.

"I kan't move my leg!" Poland noticed in panic.

WHO knelt down and inspected the leg. His expression neutral and curious. His eyes, unfeeling.

"From what I can see it looks like you have sprained a joint. Nothing serious but we need to get you to the hospital where I can treat it correctly." He softly spoke to Poland to calm him down.

Poland nodded and with the help of Kazakhstan they managed to get Poland to the hospital.

* * *

Poland was sitting on a chair and WHO was doing tests to the leg. He diagnosed him with a sprained joint, like he had suspected earlier.

"I am going to clean the wound, bandage it, and put your knee a support bandage on it. You shall not put any weight to the leg for two weeks. You shall not perform any athletics in the meantime nor shall you try to use your knee. I will prescribe you pain medication, take one pill every morning for a week if you feel pain. I will give you crutches to help your walking. I will allow you to fly if you feel like it but do be careful, a fall could sprain it to the point when it needs to be operated." WHO explained with professional tone and made sure that Poland understood everything he was said.

Poland nodded.

"I am very sorry that I crashed into you." He apologized and looked to the ground.

WHO was cleaning the wound.

"It does not bother me, it wasn't me who got injured. Do not feel bad about yourself, it was a pure accident." He reassured Poland and placed a hand on his shoulder to give him a friendly squeeze.

Poland nodded and a smile formed to his face.

"You are a very good doctor." 

WHO noted the compliment and finished cleaning the wound.

"Looks like I have to stitch this wound. It will feel uncomfortable but it should not hurt." He informed.

Poland nodded and watched as WHO got the equipment needed and then came back.

As he had successfully closed the wound up he took a roll of bandages. He wrapped the leg well, then put the support bandage on it and gave Poland crutches.

Poland thanked him and his friends were there waiting for him to return and as they saw him they hugged him. WHO observed them and saw how happy they were that Poland was alright. The joyfulness made him sad. He wished that he had friends. He wished that he could feel that kind of joy. He shook his head and leaned against the left side of the doorway and continued to watch the teens' group hug.

He remembered when he was newly formed and he was new to everything. But he had never been a child. He wished that he could have had a childhood but had a long ago accepted that things are how they are and some things that cannot be changed.

The teens were now staring at WHO and were wondering why would he be feeling sad as he had by mistake allowed his face to reflect his true feelings.

"Why are you sad?" Poland asked.

WHO blinked his eyes and realized that he had zoned out a bit.

"It's nothing for you to be concerned about. I am not sad, I was just thinking." He explained.

The teens just looked at each other and nodded.

"Oh, okay." Kazakhstan shrugged.

WHO nodded.

Poland looked WHO in the eyes.

"Would you like to join us in the garden? You look a bit... lonely." He asked.

WHO lifted his eyes from Kazakhstan to Poland and was a bit surprised by the sudden request.

"I would, but I need to finish my shift first." He explained.

Kazakhstan came closer to him and tried to look him into the eyes but it was very difficult because he was so tall and he so short.

"I know that I am a short one but god damn you're tall." He smiled.

WHO just blinked.

"Well, I guess you could put it on that way.." 

Kazakhstan rolled his eyes and smiled.

"Why are you and UN so tall?" He asked.

"Usually the height of a country is determined by the population and history. But honestly, I have no idea. I haven't been able to find the answer." He admitted and folded his arms.

The teens nodded and looked to be very curious.

"We want to learn more." They looked to be curious and excited.

WHO nodded.

"Of course. I will probably be free at 8 PM." He slightly smiled to the teens not to ruin their mood.

The teens waved him goodbye and he nodded at them before leaving to get his remaining work done.

* * *

He went to his lab, opened a window, took a cigarette from the pack which was sitting on the window ledge. He brought the cigarette on his lips and lit it up.

He took a drag and closed his eyes, he felt the nicotine rush in his brain, it felt very good. He smoked to relax but in reality the dependence of nicotine caused the urge to smoke in the first place. He knew that he should quit but had yet not done anything.

He took another drag and opened his eyes. He looked at the still on progress new medicines and sighed. He really wished he had his team right now as they could bring up new ideas on how to continue this progress any further.

He decided to continue it when he had more time, he moved to work with paperwork. He kept the cigarette on his lips while he typed. Only occasionally holding it on his fingers as he could work faster using both hands to write than just one.

After 4 hours of working, the paperwork was finally finished. He stretched his arms and yawned. And then his phone rang and he answered to it immediately.

"Yes?"

"It's me, WTO. Look, I need your help."

"I'm listening."

"It's my back, I hurt it days ago and I feel like you should have a look on it. It's very aggressively painful."

"Why didn't you tell me the last time you saw me?" WHO asked and pinched his nose bridge in annoyance.

".. I, just uh. Let's not talk about it, okay?" WTO sounded a bit anxious.

"Ok, would you like to come to my office now or.. In fact I will be in the hospital garden, meet me there."

"I'm on my way."

And with that the call ended.

WHO leaned back on his chair and just stared the ceiling. He had had a long day and the sun was already setting.

But he couldn't have told WTO 'no' when they needed his help.

He then glanced out of the window to see that the sun was slowly setting, the sun glowed golden but the teens were still playing on the grass outside. That brought a small smile to his face. 

He opened the window again and lit another cigarette and observed the children. They apparently heard the sound of a window opening as they were now looking at him and waving. WHO waved them slightly back and enjoyed his cigarette in peace, and after he was done he closed the window and wasn't long until he stepped outside.

As he approached the teens he noticed that they were playing soccer. Everyone else but Poland of course, he was sitting on a bench, reading.

He sat next to Poland on the bench.

"You seem to like reading."

Poland nodded.

"Yeah, I love to imagine the stories they have as a movie inside my head." He smiled widely.

WHO nodded. He begun to feel a bit anxious. He was horrible at socializing and was looking for clues to continue the conversation.

Poland noticed that and was a bit uncomfortable.

"What are you doing?" He carefully asked.

WHO noticed that the action must have disturbed Poland's reading.

"I am sorry. I will stop immediately if that bothers you." He apologized.

Poland didn't know what to think.

"I just isn't used to anyone doing that. Why are you observing me?" He asked.

"I was trying to find something to discuss about." WHO simply answered and lowered his wings.

Poland nodded.

"It's okay." He smiled and continued to read.

WHO after a while rose from the bench and walked over a small garden fountain. He admired how the water danced, very calculated, symmetrical, a mathematically perfection. He flexed his wings as they ached from being closed for too long in one go. He stretched his arms as well and felt instant relief as the tension easened.

Poland watched as WHO lifted his wings fully open and admired how large they were. Pure white, just like angel wings. The same color his feather crown was. And his long lab coat.

Poland rose from the bench and decided to fly next to WHO. As his presence was noticed WHO's neutral face formed almost non-existent smile. Poland noticed it and smiled too but something was bothering him.

"Why do you always smile like that?" He asked.

WHO was yet again taken back by the question.

"What do you mean?" He asked and his smile vanished.

Poland rolled his eyes while levitating right next to him.

"That smile so small it is hard to even find it."

WHO was silent for a while.

"Would you like me to stop?" He asked.

Poland was just staring at him with wide eyes.

"No, of course not. What I meant to ask was, are you able to smile any wider?" He asked.

WHO was silent for a long time.

"I won't smile any wider if I do not see a reason to."

Poland just stared him.

"Do you not have feelings?" He asked.

"I do feel, but I haven't yet felt that great sensation of joy for a while which would make me smile any wider." He explained.

Poland felt really sad.

"Why not? That must be so sad."

"I suspect is has something to do with the fact that I do not usually have much people to socialize with. Chatting with patients doesn't count as it is about their recovery; I am only to help them, not to talk about my own interests." WHO rubbed his chin.

Poland felt awful.

"You must be feeling lonely then."

WHO nodded. His facial expression neutral, not showing any signs of any regognizable emotion. His eyes revealed that he was hurting inside.

"I guess I sometimes feel a bit lonely." He finally admitted and lowered his wings to show his mood.

His eyes weren't showing much emotion anymore, but his wings told a different story. He was definitely feeling a bit uncomfortable now. But the way he kept himself from barely expressing any of it was concerning.

"Why do you hide your feelings?" Poland asked.

WHO just stared at him and thought about it.

"Must be a habit. I cannot show any of my real feelings when I am treating my patients as it shall not intervene the process of them telling me about their feelings." He logically explained better than the last time Poland brought the subject up earlier today.

"You are a psychiatrist, right?" Poland asked.

WHO nodded.

"Among the other medical degrees I currently possess, yes."

"Then you should know better than to torture yourself by not allowing yourself to feel when you're not treating a patient." Poland placed his hand on WHO's shoulder.

WHO smiled genuinely at that.

"Thank you for reminding me that."

Poland looked excited and his cheeks were pink.

"You look nice when you're smiling." Poland complimented.

WHO was haunted by that reaction. But as he was about to say something he noticed that Poland's friends were all gathered around them and were smiling.

"You are welcome to talk with us any time." Kazakhstan offered.

WHO was internally panicking. He had no training for situations like these. He then calmed himself down and gave himself the same advice he would give a patient in a same situation.

"Very generous offer, I am delighted." He nodded. His social battery had ran out, he felt exhausted. He had to get out from the teens. He then checked the time and realized it was almost 8 PM.

WTO would be arriving very soon and almost like magic WHO saw them approaching him. Levitating as usual. Their wings lazily drooping.

They looked very tired.

WHO folded his arms and looked at the children.

"I have to attend to a business now, I will see if I have any free time in the next days." He nodded.

The children waved him goodbyes and continued their playing.

"You seem to enjoy spending time with children, huh." WTO sarcastically assumed.

WHO just shook his head.

"I do not especially like nor dislike them. I am not very good with them, that's all."

WTO looked at the children playing and shook their head.

"If I were a child I would definitely not play around like that, I would rather read statute books under a tree."

WHO laughed.

"Definitely, that's what I would imagine you doing too."

WTO just smirked and folded their arms.

"Let's head up to your office and see what the fuck is wrong with my back."

WHO nodded and they took their leave.

* * *

As they were climbing the stairs WTO begun to feel exhausted. Their back hurt like hell and their legs didn't want to function any longer. They have forgotten how hard it was to simply climb stairs when they usually just levitated instead of climbing.

"I hate stairs." They tiredly announced.

WHO looked a bit concerned.

"Why don't you levitate right up and I'll meet you there?" He requested.

WTO nodded and begun to levitate the stairs up.

They felt the fatigue on every muscle. Suddenly it was becoming hard to stay conscious.

Then everything went black.

As WTO opened their eyes they realized that they were lying on a couch and WHO was on the balcony, apparently smoking as usual.

Their back hurt like it was trying to kill them.

"WHO, what happened?" They asked.

WHO turned to look at them.

"You fainted."

"Yeah, I got that."

"When was the last time you ate?" He asked.

WTO was silent for a while.

"Maybe this morning, why?"

WHO shook his head.

"You need to eat regularly. And besides eating irregularly and unhealthy makes you gain weight."

WTO rolled their eyes. Sat up and put their hands on their belly. The excess weight there had formed insidiously without them even paying any attention to it. They then spotted the mirror on the wall and looked sad. The love handles and the now bloated sight of a belly didn't look very pleasing to them. To say at least. Even as they weren't that much overweight it would highlight as they barely had any muscles and was very skinny everywhere else but the abdomen. His bones would almost show up from some parts of their body as there weren't muscle tissue to keep them hidden.

WHO was very concerned about WTO's health as that would definitely not be considered as healthy, not at all.

"Yeah, yeah. I just... didn't really think eating right was that important."

"You have worked for days non-stop, right?" WHO sighed.

WTO nodded.

"Apparently so." They slightly grinned in embarrassment. 

WHO face palmed.

"You need to have something else to do besides working. You will kill yourself if you won't do anything about it."

WTO didn't want to hear any of that. They just nodded and pretended to be planning to change their lifestyle. 

"You aren't really listening, are you?" WHO raised an eyebrow.

"Of course..." WTO rolled their eyes.

WHO lit another cigarette and turned away from WTO. He felt frustrated that they didn't even try to listen to him.

WTO felt guilty. They knew that they had a problem.

"WHO, look. I am sorry."

WHO sighed.

"You need to take care of yourself. You cannot continue like this." He turned back to look at WTO. Folded his right arm around his abdomen while holding a cigarette on his left hand.

"I know. I just... I am too keen on my work. I can't 'just do something else' on my time than work." WTO admitted.

"Then you need help with that. Lucky you, I am a medical professional." He smirked and took a drag from his cigarette.

WTO shook their head and smiled slightly.

"A medical professional who intentionally wants a lung cancer."

"Let's not talk about that, ..instead, let's talk about how we can lessen up your workaholism to even a barely acceptable level." WHO smiled smugly.

WTO nodded.

"But first, I will have a look at your back."

* * *

WHO had gestured WTO to take their shirt off as it would make it easier to inspect the back more closely.

WTO had been hesitant removing their shirt. And as they removed it WHO found out why.

They had bandages on both of their wrists, they looked clean but their biceps were full of needle marks. The kind of ones from injecting something into one's bloodstream.

"Oh god.. " WHO silently commented.

"I can explain." WTO looked very anxious.

"Proceed."

WTO took a breath to steady themself up.

"I have been injecting morphine. It is not for to please me, it is to ease up the pain. You have no idea how much pain I am having every day." They tried their hardest to not break down.

WHO looked concerned.

"Which kind of pain are we talking about?"

"My every limb hurts all the time, especially my back. It's very unbearable, I have to somehow make it less... _painful_."

"Do you have any idea what might be causing the pain?" WHO asked and made tests with WTO's vertebra and as he touched a few particular ones WTO flinched and hissed. 

"It must be from multiple things. I work too much, I don't exercise, I have a horrible posture, I have hurted it by falling down the stairs and I'm overweight." They admitted.

WHO was still inspecting the backbone and the vertebra which hurted the most.

"Please quit touching them, it's very painful." They pleaded with obvious pain in their voice.

WHO withdrew his hands and folded his arms.

"I need to take röntgen and magnetic to find out exactly what's going on with your back."

WTO sighed and leaned back on the couch and grimased when their back popped a few times.

"I fucking hate that."

WHO checked the time, it was already 10 PM. It was too late to take any of those tests. It would need to wait until tomorrow.

"It's late. I can't perform any of those two tests mentioned earlier today, it will have to wait till tomorrow." He told them.

WTO just nodded.

"I would not like to move anywhere if that's okay with you."

"Of course, you can sleep on the couch or next to me if you wish to." He offered.

WTO considered their options and chose to sleep next to WHO as the couch wasn't exactly the softest one.

"I choose to sleep with you, prepare yourself with that." They winked.

WHO just smiled and went to hung his lab coat. Finally his day was over.

Now he needed to find a blanket and a pillow for WTO. And as he had made everything ready for them to sleep he returned to the living room only to saw WTO about to inject himself.

"Would you like me to show you the correct way to do it?" He offered.

WTO lifted their eyes and nodded.

"Yeah, why not."

WHO was silent for a moment as he was obviously thinking about something.

"What are you thinking about?" WTO asked.

"I was thinking about how dangerous is to constantly inject morphine to one's bloodstream. You can become seriously dependant to the drug and that can.. _will_ lead to problems." He explained.

WTO just stared at him and then back at the needle.

"You're right, but I don't know how I can tolerate the pain without any substance to relief the pain."

"I might just have the medicine for you. It's called AT-121, a morphine-like drug but not addictive and not opioid-based."

WTO's eyes brightened.

"Sound's amazing, can I try it?"

WHO nodded.

"Certainly. I need to get it for you, I'll be right back. And, I will take this bottle of morphine away from you as you won't be needing it anymore."

WTO handed him the bottle and felt a bit anxious to 'just give it away'. But they could purchase a new one quite easily if they really wanted to.

And with that WHO was gone.

WTO took the time to have a look at WHO's apartment.

His apartment located on the 4th level.

His apartment wasn't very large, it had a bedroom, a living room, a kitchen, a bathroom and a small balcony. Nothing very special but as he lived alone it was enough for him. The apartment luckily had ceilings high enough that he could stand comfortably without needing to put his head down to fit inside. 

The walls were plain white, everything looked very modern and sterile. It had no colors other than green from the various types of houseplants of his. He had one very large Monstera deliciosa which was almost as tall as him, leaves as large as taking each up to 1 m on diameter and they had very nice fenestrations and holes on them. The plant was very mature, it even florished once. And other smaller houseplants with big, green leaves. The plants were everywhere, it suited the apartment nicely and gave it a natural taste.

They haven't been there very often, they felt a bit guilty for not being with WHO more often. They were a couple after all. 

They stood up and almost screamed when their back hurted again, it felt like someone had a knife inside of one of the vertebra and was now trying to slice it open. They quickly switched into levitating and the pain lessened a bit but still stayed very strong.

As they looked in the fridge and saw that there was a vanilla cake their stomach reminded them that it was time to eat. They knew that it would be okay to eat a few pieces of the cake.

As WHO came back he was invited with a sight of WTO eating cake and drinking a soda.

"That's a... nice healthy snack there." He joked.

WTO just rolled their eyes.

"Didn't bother to check for any other variables. Did you bring the medicine?"

WHO nodded and handed them the bottle.

"It's dose will have to be calculated specifically. You have to be weighed to ensure you don't take a too high dosage. It's over 100 times as effective as morphine."

WTO just stared at the bottle.

"Okay, fine. Let's."

WHO pulled out the scales and gestured WTO to step on it. They obeyed.

WHO watched the result and did math.

"128 kilos, okay. That's on a healthy weight scale but considering that you have almost zero muscle mass and you obviously are overweight you need to take a bit smaller dose than recommended."

WTO rolled their eyes and stepped out.

"Fantastic, now show me how it's done."

WHO nodded and prepared the dose, took a needle, filled the needle with the dose, tapped it a few times to get rid of any potential air. He took a rubber band to lessen the blood circulation a bit. Wiped the spot clean with alcohol and injected the substance, and after that he cleaned the spot and put a bandage on it.

"And that's how it is professionally done." He smiled.

WTO nodded as a thanks. But almost instantly they felt the effects of the drug.

"Oh wow, it feels amazing. Thanks!" Their rings as eyes dilated a bit and they really looked like they were in some substance as they were.

WHO just nodded and went to look if WTO had spared him any cake.

There was ONE piece left. WHO turned back with the piece to WTO who just smiled widely. WHO wasn't sure if it was only from the act or the substance.

"How nice to leave me a piece. Very generous." He sarcastically pointed as he was eating the piece and smirked.

* * *

They needed to rest. 

His bed was very long so they could lay down on it easily and comfortably.

As they was lying on the bed, WHO's glasses on the nightstand, all he could see was blur. He felt like every limb hurt and it didn't help that his wings were also sore. Eventually he was asleep and receiving the very much needed rest.

WTO felt like heaven as the drug had gotten a hold of them. But the fear of the pain returning still fresh in mind.

* * *

As he woke up the next morning at 5:08 AM he was still tired as hell, everything ached but not as much as they did yesterday. He got up and made the bed, put his glasses back on, opened curtains, stretched himself and flexed his sore wings carefully. He didn't bother to wake WTO up as they were peacefully sleeping so much needed rest. They looked like they haven't slept in days which probably was the truth anyway.

He noticed that he had been such in an exhausted state that he had slept with his daily clothes on. He shook his head and changed to new, clean ones and tossed the used ones to the laundry bin. He had apparently also forgotten to brush his teeth so that's the first thing he did next. After he had washed his face and used the toilet, he begun to make himself some coffee.

As he was drinking his must have morning coffee on the balcony, sitting on a chair and smoking a cigarette he begun to 'really wake up'. Without caffeine and nicotine he literally would not be able to start his day.

He sighed in relief as his head begun to work again. 

He looked down at the grass and saw no-one. No sane soul would be up this early if they didn't have a good reason to. WHO had a good reason, his shift would begin 5:30 AM.

The thought about actually eating something healthy came back to his mind as he had just ate a little piece of cake yesterday. Now he wasn't too tired to cook but not exactly too well rested to be able to enjoy doing it. He sighed and stumped the butt of the cigarette to the ashtray and rose up from the chair and went back inside closing the door in the progress. He took out a bread, took three slices and placed them on a plate. He then put the rest of the bred away, and made double layer sandwich. He felt a bit more energized after eating that sandwich and felt like he was ready to start the day.

He washed the dishes, put them to the drying rack, exited the kitchen put his lab coat back on and exited his apartment. WTO would wake up sooner or later and when they did, they would likely call him.

As he was walking down the hallways UN came back to his mind. He has an appointment with him today and he had been thinking about taking UN to the Zen garden. WHO hoped to get something out of UN today. He had been avoiding answering any questions or comments WHO would bring up to him. It would brighten up his day very much to see UN showing some signs of emotion or feeling.

But right now he got a vaccine to develop with help of several other scientists of course.


End file.
